Before I get into this, I do not mean anyone is literally punching/being punched in this situation. I figured after writing that it might be construed as a bit of a red flag for a title.
Also, there's a TL;DR at the bottom if you want to skip all the rambling.
So, I know this is definitely a situation a LOT of people are in. Who knows how it happens, perhaps it's just people who have a generally level-headed attitude, but we end up as the people that everyone dumps all their problems on. This is not a bad thing, per se. I myself enjoy being able to help my friends (or complete strangers who profess their horrifying life issues. It happens.). In general, you can bounce their ideas back and forth, help them figure out how to get through tough times or offer an outside opinion, and they will walk away better off and with more perspective.
But then, you get the folks who are just looking for someone to use as an emotional punching bag. You may be familiar with them, they like to rant and rave and scream and shout, but whenever you offer advice they completely disregard it and then respond by talking about how helpless they are, how much you probably hate them for having problems, etc. This just happened to me today, and it hit an extreme that I can't even handle anymore.
So, TO BEGIN THE POINT OF THIS POST: There's a girl I've been talking with online/via text for awhile, she's lovely, we click, we were beginning to sorta dip a toe into the possibility of a romantic relationship, et cetera. And apparently she's going through a really tough phase. It's understandable, it happens. I made the assumption that it was a simple extended downward mood swing- the sort of thing that happens to everyone now and then. Well, now it has come to light that there's self mutilation and suicide pondering/attempts possibly going on. I made it clear to her that, while I will be a supportive friend to her, I will not get involved romantically if she's in such a vulnerable state. romance is just too much of a wildcard to throw around when you're battling severe depression and suicide. Apparently I should have mentioned that a lot sooner, because she's already considering us "practically dating" and each time I try to explain that we are not, she thinks I'm just being silly. So, getting back on point with the emotional punching bag bit, today I missed almost everything that was going on in my classes because I was back-and-forth texting her trying to convince her not to cut for hours. I told her to see a doctor, to see a therapist, to call a hotline, to talk to someone in person, and it was all met with responses like "You're mad at me, now I hate myself more".
There is just no. fucking. winning. I want to be supportive, I want to help her, but I've got my own shit to deal with. I can't be on-call 24/7 to help someone who won't seek any help and instead sends me pictures of the razors, the cuts, and then waxes on about how pathetic I think they are now (which I do not). I either need to find a way to get her some help (I can potentially get in contact with a friend that knows her in person, but I do not have an address to warn the police with if she's attempting suicide) or I need to know a way to cleanly detach myself from her without sending her into another self-harm spiral.
TL;DR - Suicidal friend who has become romantically attached to me. Wont seek professional help. How can I get her to find help, or somehow remove myself from the situation without making them do something harmful to themselves in response?