Make your favorite game sound as shit as possible

Discussion in 'PC and Console Gaming' started by Yakamaru, Nov 2, 2016.

  1. Lcs

    Lcs Well-Known Member

    You start as a country of your choice in the 1830s, of which some are objectively impossible to survive as. You want to avoid democracy, entrepreneurs and decent living standards, but totalitarian governments, 100% taxes on the poor and middle classes, and war are pretty great though. Never ending waves of rebels are expected while as the possibility of you getting back any money you lent out to an AI country is not. The vanilla version of the game is broken and the total cost of the DLCs to fix it are together priced higher than the base game itself.
  2. INCtastic

    INCtastic Digimon Poster

    Prisoner gets entrusted with the emperors holy necklace and carries it to jis bastard son to save the world from hell
    ChapterAquila92 likes this.
  3. Iovic

    Iovic Member

    And your friend playing as Brazil loses his entire army (including guards) to an inferior force due to sticking them on 0 maintenance, because "it costs him money" even though he has literally millions in the bank. We checked afterwards and found he had 1 gun per 1000 men.

    He then accidentally becomes a puppet of Japan.
    Yakamaru, ChapterAquila92 and Lcs like this.
  4. Yakamaru

    Yakamaru Logically chaotic and twice as charming

    Space. Whatever the hell you find, you're going to get raped. Doesn't matter if it's some cunty neighbor(s) whose technology levels are higher than you, some ancient xenophobic empire having a hardon for you, some random ancient Leviathan having a hardon for your planet, or a shitty starting area.

    Resources available are at times at garbage levels, and so is your species. Well, if you can make them being not-so-garbage, it does tend to help. Weirdass and annoying "end-game" events. It's either huge tentacle monsters from planet "Totally Hentai" who rapes entire planetary systems, or energy beings from another dimension going "Let me succ your..ENERGY". Either way, you're fucked.
    Abyssalrider and ChapterAquila92 like this.
  5. septango

    septango ᴓᴥᴓ

    a game with about 300 pieces of micro transaction dlc, newest game barely worked at launch, you have to exploit bugs to get the most out of it, and the community is flooded with scene/emo kids who steal credit from other players
  6. GreenZone

    GreenZone Well-Known Member

    you kill Bambi's mum and sell her to buy more bullets then return return later to finish off Bambi only to find he runs around you in circles and kills you because he's moving at the speed of a thousand cats who have just seen a cucumber
  7. Yvvki

    Yvvki Sassy lesser panda.

    You play as a hipster girl, and your objective is to screw around in people's lives to maybe find your druggie "best friend's" real friend who may or may not be alive- while the town serial killer may or may not have a photograph fetish.
    kidchameleon and Yakamaru like this.
  8. ChapterAquila92

    ChapterAquila92 Resident Bronze Dragon Kasrkin

    Einstein shows why going back in time to erase Hitler from history is a bad idea. Years later, some Russians show why going back in time to erase Einstein from history is also a bad idea.
  9. Titanic-Wyvern

    Titanic-Wyvern Dat Ace Lizard

    You're just minding your own business, about to graduate and become a protector of the galaxy... Then a gigantic tentacle monster thing shows up and fucks everything up. Plus Earth is torn apart, and you manage to survive by escaping on a ship that looks conveniently like something your culture would make, and now are flung into space where you basically go on fetch quests to unlock some gate and defeat the monster that screwed everything up. But you could care less and instead just build houses and kill innocent creatures on random planets without a care. :V
    Yvvki likes this.
  10. Yvvki

    Yvvki Sassy lesser panda.

    Starbound. XD
    Titanic-Wyvern likes this.
  11. Titanic-Wyvern

    Titanic-Wyvern Dat Ace Lizard

    :D You got it!
    Yvvki likes this.
  12. Rystren

    Rystren Call me FLUuFFFFEH

    You start on a special mission to find the source of extreme EM radiation on an island just off the coast of Russia. Your helicopters are downed by an emp, and it is only downhill from there. After wandering around this deserted island, you find yourself inside a burnt out building. And then you immediately find yourself back in time inside the burning building. And just so happen to save the main antagonist of the game. Back to the present and surprise. EVERYTHING HAS CHANGED. Run around some more, be hunted, find a super overpowered weapon, and never save the world. The only way to save the world is to go back in time and murder yourself. Or you could rule the world.
    ChapterAquila92 likes this.
  13. ChapterAquila92

    ChapterAquila92 Resident Bronze Dragon Kasrkin

  14. PlusThirtyOne

    PlusThirtyOne What DOES my username mean...?

    Start game, crash to desktop, start game, crash to desktop, check mod load order, start game, crash to desktop, change mod load order, start game, game loads, "New game", get stuck in infinite loading screen, ctrl+alt+esc, kill game, change mod load order, start game, "New game", game successfully loads, create new character, name new character, save game, quit game.

    Repeat again in a week.
  15. Norros

    Norros Guest

    Some nerd gets involved in a dangerous experiment, kills aliens and saves the planet, but in the next game everything begins again.
  16. 2dozen22s

    2dozen22s (☞΄◞ ิ۝ ิ ‵) ☞

    You download the latest patch to see if they finally fixed that game breaking bug or exploit they added last update, then you hit play and pray, hoping the game's performance has not gotten any worse. Of course by the time you log on, the only platoons are asian zergfits overpoping bases & abusing their 750ms ping to instagib you. Later in the day as more skilled players arrive you begin to wonder if the bullets even hit the guy who killed you, or if its the server. A yell chat confirms the server hamster is dying. Lucky the fight is going wel- the continent locks, now you must wait 20 minutes to find a similar fight.

    Rise and repeat untill the salt consumes you.
  17. voxuan

    voxuan New Member

  18. zombieraptor

    zombieraptor New Member

    stupid fucking detective answers a call to a hospital and finds everyone straight up murdered, manages to let his guard down enough to get knocked the fuck out. then gets plunged into nightmarish hell, only to get out of said hell like nothing happened. Also his co workers are assholes.
  19. ChapterAquila92

    ChapterAquila92 Resident Bronze Dragon Kasrkin

    You use enslaved magical animals to bully people for fun and profit. Not to be outdone, your competition consists of a street gang, Yakuzas, eco-terrorists, doomsday cults, PETA, and a crazy woman with a thing for aliens.


    As a park ranger, you deputize magical animals into fighting a rock band, an oil company, and mercenary archeologists.


    You wake up in a non-MLP version of Equestria as part of a self-insert TF fanfic.
    zombieraptor likes this.
  20. real time strategist

    real time strategist "What's an airport, again?"

    It's not uncommon to have loincloth cave your skull in. Also changing the mode of the game makes the game go from feeling finished to feeling like it has only one way to play and that way is really bland and boring. The game, despite having no graphics, kills your computer and I have yet to see a computer that can handle this game at full speed later on in the game.
  21. WolfoxeCrevan


    The graphics are crap.

    I'm talking about pixel gun.

    And like, it's not even a joke.

    Edit: I did this wrong... didn't I?
  22. MinhtheMage

    MinhtheMage Closet Furry

    Surrounded by all manner of small children ages 9-12, insta-locking DPS and pretending they know how to play the cyborg ninja or magical dragon archer whilst also begging for healing and making my eardrums bleed. I'm always forced to play healer and I feel my IQ drop a few points each time I play it, as well as my skill rating. I usually barely scrape wins together amongst all the shitty players out there.
  23. SveltColt

    SveltColt NANI?!?

    Why does everyone like this game.
    I mean all you do is click circles thats it.

    Last edited: Sep 30, 2017
  24. Mabus

    Mabus Well-Known Woofer

    Stellaris needs wolf race... ò^ó
  25. Iovic

    Iovic Member

    The king of Serbia got the Pope to Excommunicate me for no reason whatsoever. Then my second son kills me in a plot, splitting the kingdom in half.
    Wait. Why isn't the Pope living in Roma anymore? Why is he in Uppland? WHY IS THE POPE ALSO THE PRINCE OF SWEDEN*??

    *Well, Svea Rike anyway.
    Lcs likes this.

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