Your most profound personal changes

Discussion in 'Community Discussion' started by KimberVaile, Oct 22, 2017.

  1. -..Legacy..-

    -..Legacy..- Sergal Mafia :P

    Lol. I don't along in civilian workplaces. Zero sense of teamwork and the bigger picture usually.

    You had me confused at first when I seen the M4 rigs in that video lol. I was like: where's that .308 plastic fantastic?
     
  2. GreenZone

    GreenZone Well-Known Member

    that's either airsoft or simunition we use it in training before moving onto the Augs because you're waving your guns around a fair bit its for safety

    also lol are you talking about the old SLR? that's not been used for millions of years
     
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  3. ChromaticRabbit

    ChromaticRabbit lagomorphic

    When my dad died without warning at age 62. It was a tough circumstance capping a tough twenty or twenty-five years of profound familial dysfunction. I had been estranged from him at that point for the better measure of a decade; I literally couldn't recall the last time we spoke or what it was about. I always knew I'd circle around when I found my own peace with my childhood and was ready to reconnect with him in spite of that evil second wife screening our interactions. But, we found out after his passing that he had late-stage pancreatic cancer, he passed away on his "first night of chemo," and that was that.

    We found out about it because someone posted a condolence to my sister's Facebook page, and she had no idea until then. She read it to me and my other siblings at our brother's wedding reception on the west coast. Evil second wife had scheduled the funeral for the next day, literally across the continent the day after the man's eldest son's wedding, a wedding he had been invited to. We had to decide to not tell our older brother because, after all, it was his wedding night. I broke the news two days later myself on the drive out to airport to head back home.

    When I got home, for the first time I felt I was in a safe space to actually process everything that had just transpired, and so I sat out on my front deck and I wept aloud that night. My at-the-time roommate came out and denigrated me for crying, and I was so incised that I went to my room and wrote a letter inviting him to move out or be a decent human being. He decided he'd move out. In the coming weeks and months after this, I discovered that while holding memory of my father and feeling the pain of his loss, it unlocked all these memories of my childhood that I had all-but-forgotten about, and I deep-dived into my past in this manner, pulling back up pieces of myself, and suddenly, somehow, feeling free to become myself. My identification as non-cisgender followed quickly, and the rest has been like this new life, with new challenges and battles, friends and predators, and a new approach to so much. I've left a lot out, so this may not seem to make rational sense, but actually it's quite reasonable. I'd simply have to be way more autobiographical than I'm ready to be to explain fully. But this is probably the biggest impact on my life because it was a catalytic trigger that dislodged a 24 year-old psychosocial developmental logjam...
     
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  4. ChapterAquila92

    ChapterAquila92 Resident Bronze Dragon Kasrkin

    That was pretty much what my father advised as a former infantryman-turned-geomatics-technician. And so I took up engineering.
     
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  5. Furyou;)

    Furyou;) New Member

    Being a furry has changed my life. The first time I changed my perspectives on everything was at a furry convention. I had never really considered myself gay until I went for the first time. I was only 18 at the when I went and I didn't know anyone there really. I was nervous but excited at the same time. Seeing everyone as an animal made me feel more welcome. A tall slender wolf walked up to me and interduced himself. His name was scruffy. He liked the tail I had on. He couldn't tell if I was a girl or a boy cause of my costume. I was dressed as a small brown dog with a collar on. He began telling me about himself, the more I spoke the more I felt comfortable in my new skin. We talked for about 3 hours before he asked me back to his room. The furry convention was connected to rooms so people could stay over night and be there the next day. At first I was surprised but I began to feel like something was telling me to go. I said sure and bit my lip..
    He glanced back at me in his suit and put his hand on my thigh. I felt helpless, like I couldn't resist. He kissed my lips and said follow me. I couldn't help but to walk behind him. After about 5 minutes we arrived at his room. He opened the door, lead me in, and locked it behind him. My body was num. After that night nothing has been the same.
     
  6. RuffusTheLynx

    RuffusTheLynx Pff... just a casual lynx...

    My personal deepest changes were before I found the fandom, I think ... I recently left elementary school and lived horrible things that I want to forget ...
    All the children harassed me, I did not make friends, I tried not to pay attention, that worked for a while, but then they started attacking me physically, they were the most horrible years of my life, I became a sad person ... but then, I found the fandom and my life changed, now, I am very happy, and then my personal state changed, I gave my family problems because of my conduct, but now that changed, now i do not give a fuck what they say about me, I was the "intelligent weak" of my class, but now i can be the "intelligent bad boy that I am not a bullying target". And I realized that it is they who have real problems in their lives, I do not know to get angry or sad for them.
     
  7. Dalirous

    Dalirous New Member

    I was a bad asshole
    People told me to stop being a bad asshole
    I became a good asshole
     
  8. My most profound personal changes have happened to me over the last six-plus years. I used to have a bad diet, hated learning, was shy, had little self-discipline, was immature, and was pretty dispassionate about life. Now I am the complete opposite.
     
  9. BahgDaddy

    BahgDaddy Voice of reason

    Not something I'd write on a public forum.
     
  10. aloveablebunny

    aloveablebunny don't pull my ears!

    Hmm. I'll keep it short and sweet.

    Overcoming (for the most part) crippling social anxiety, that was a result from being bullied in elementary-high school.

    I was on antidepressant/anti-anxiety medication for about a year, plus seeing a therapist from grade 10-12.

    I decided to get off the medication because I wanted to deal with things organically, and not be dependent on it to function.

    It's been almost 10 years, and while a handful of situations (namely public speaking or extremely crowded places) still are triggers that cause me to have a hard time, I have been able to hold jobs for long periods of time, do well at them, and work through understanding the root of the anxiety in order to cope with it.

    I never thought I would get past that, but I learned that I have to be bigger and stronger than my anxiety. It's not always easy, and I have bad days where it feels impossible, but overall the understanding I have now of it helps me to continue to be a functional person.
     
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  11. dogryme6

    dogryme6 Destructive Faffer

    I was insane in my junior high school days. No idea what came over me, but things that were happening at the time REALLY didn't help. The Playstation Network hacking by the Lizard Squad, and how that took out my connection to my online friends and buying new games and stuff for like a month on frikken christmas. Coulda done something reeeeeeal bad because of that. But taking your woes out on innocents just because your own life is a joke is a terrible thing to do.
    I got sick of people and how things we used to be able to trust are failing us now for a few years now. This sickness has stained my view on what the world outside of my local area looks like. Basically, everything in america sucks.
     
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  12. I've gone through a similar phase from long-term social isolation and just being generally lost in this chaotic period of life, which not only made me feel cynical and pessimistic about people in general but also led to me driving recklessly to vent those feelings. A lot of times people experience personal frustrations that make them more reckless and can change their worldviews, but getting over these problems requires time and personal confidence in that things will get better. It takes a lot of small steps that can make a frustrated person impatient and weary.
     
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  13. Jay98

    Jay98 The violent man-eater

    I've never been much of a reactor, more like an instigator. I was born with this personality and nothing in my life has changed it. I'm stubborn as hell but my heart is in the right place. People say I was born an adult. I've always been the mature one. The way I see it I must be on the new game plus of real life. i'm already leveled up and experienced before i hit go. it is cool though when you see the noobs struggling and you get to tell them all the cheat codes.
     
  14. dogryme6

    dogryme6 Destructive Faffer

    Yikes... Driving recklessly's probably one of the worst things you can do.
    ... Personally, I'm not really confident that things will get better considering the way the current systems in america are. You're in space, there's no steps to take because you're already screwed.
     
  15. The world could be in chaos, but it doesn't mean our lives have to be. Any small steps to improve our lives can go a long way to giving us a sense of direction.
     
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  16. Sarachaga

    Sarachaga You gain Brouzouf

    This really speaks to me, as someone who's affected by SA.
    I'm really glad you manage to cope with it.
     
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  17. dogryme6

    dogryme6 Destructive Faffer

    Well... I guess...
     
  18. Sarcastic Coffeecup

    Sarcastic Coffeecup Hand. Cannot. Erase.

    There was a time I was full of life and I thought I could be anything.
    Then I developed a lovely gift of mood disorders.
    It got me good, but later I came to terms with me not making it through life in one piece and realised I had a means to get out if I really can't go on.
    That choice, when there doesn't seem to be any, is liberating, and nowadays I go on life reasonably calm most days with the knowledge I'm not supposed to win in this life anyway.
    So I don't know, I embraced the reality of things and found solace. Sure it's made me cynical and perhaps a defeatist, but that realisation alone has helped me and it's made me carry on.
    In a way, I've already given up. Flying on fumes as far as I go.
     
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  19. StolenMadWolf

    StolenMadWolf resident Lab Wolf

    Initally I was a talkative, overly emotional kid at primary and early years of high school who was your classic school idiot/awkward kid. Alright for primary but when I went to high school I got bullied to no end. Got hulmilated a few times and ended up transforming into a guy who was far more withdrawn, quiet and even downright unemotional at times. When I went to college and uni, with no more asshole bullies the old personality started to reemerge and merged with the new one. I was still quiet, but showed more emotion and started turning into a right snarker. That's where I am now.

    On an other note, During education I changed from having a very clear, if unrealistic goal in life to having absolutely no idea at all.

    Then there was anger. I used to be a right easily annoyed sod, then I reigned and had better control over it... now I'm losing my rag more often again to the point where I've delibrately stopped myself from doing things that trigger me for the time being.
     
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  20. dogryme6

    dogryme6 Destructive Faffer

    Huh... Besides the bullying part that's kind of how I am too.
     
  21. aloveablebunny

    aloveablebunny don't pull my ears!

    Compared to where I was when I first started understanding this was a serious issue, I have come a LONG way. I still much prefer to do introverted things most of the time though. Parties/crowded scenes aren't my cup of tea, luckily I know my limits pretty well so I can remove myself from most situations that start giving me that familiar panicky feeling. Others, I have to just breathe and understand that this is temporary and will pass.

    Public speaking is an instant trigger, or basically being put in the spotlight. Because of the type of work that I've been doing for the last 8 years (customer service, management, leader-type roles), I've kind of been forced outside of my "safe zone" a lot. As uncomfortable as it was, it absolutely helped to minimize my anxiety and to learn to become stronger than it. Also, talking to people about it has helped both in seeing it's a real, tangible thing that can be worked with, and for having other people understand better why certain situations are tough for me.

    If you ever want to talk about your own struggles, you are always welcome to shoot me a message and I would be happy to either listen, or share some things that have helped me over the years, or both. :)
     
  22. JJPaw

    JJPaw New Member

    Gaining my sona. The Furry Fandom was one of the few life-changing aspects in my life. By developing, harnessing and establishing my sona. It allowed me to dump things I couldn't be IRL into something I could project easily through other means. For the longest time, I was an extremely closeted person. I was closeted about my identity, my sexuality, my futures and everything in between. I still progressed in life, but every step I took, it was like a battle to decide the next course of action. It was tediously stressful.

    So, in came my sona that I'd allow to become a part of me. Through it, I was more confident into the idea of dating guys (I'm bisexual and I got my first boyfriend through the fandom), I was able to be more assertive and find comfort into the idea of socializing. Moreso, I was able to come through and enact on fantasies I robbed of myself experiencing through my sona.

    I like being fluffy and warm. I can't imagine now a life where I didn't have a sona and whether or not I'd keep some parts intact or recoil back into stage one.
     
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  23. Telnac

    Telnac Fundamentalist Heretic

    The event that changed me more than anything else was converting to Christianity. Before I was a Christian, I was in the occult. I practiced divination and believed I was psychic. I had a spirit guide who taught me these practices and eventually led me to others who believed as I did. At that time I was extremely arrogant. I didn't consider myself human, for I believed that my third eye was open and most humans didn't even know they had a third eye. I saw them as blind fools but those I despised most were Christians. Others could at least acknowledge that they didn't know the truth but Christians were worse than lemmings. In my eyes, they were following a path that leads off of a cliff. They were so blinded by their faith in a flawed book and their dead savior that they not only didn't see the cliff they were heading toward, they would judge anyone who didn't follow them off of that cliff.

    I won't bore you with the details but I ended up insulting a good friend of mind who was a Christian, which ended our friendship. She moved away shortly after that and I lost track of her for 20 years. For the first time in my life, I was aware of sin. This was someone I intentionally hurt but who I couldn't apologize to. There was no way to right that wrong. For someone like me who was so arrogant as to believe I was nearly divine that was a shock to the ego I couldn't reconcile. I was a sinner. Karma couldn't blot out that stain. That one sin weighed heavily on my heart and ate away at my towering ego like termites eating away at the support beams of a fortress.

    When I was in college, I was more "powerful" than ever. I even was part of a divination ritual where we relayed a message written in German from the dead grandmother of a friend. Only that friend (who was a witness to the ritual but not a participant) knew German. No one else in the room did, nor did we know that her grandmother lived & died in Germany. However, the more "powerful" I became the more that one sin gnawed at me. How could I be this great & powerful being and yet be a sinner? I didn't know it at the time, but the fortress of my ego was on the verge of collapse.

    Some Christians would occasionally open-air preach on the campus quad, and I enjoyed making fun of them. However, one time they had a message that cut through my armor of arrogance: Jesus loves you. Wait... what?! If Jesus was alive as Christians believed, surely He'd hate my guts! Yet they claimed that Jesus loved me. I was so stunned I had no response. One of them handed me a flier to their Bible study, which I attended. That's where they laid open the Gospel and for the first time I really listened to it. I had mocked it for so long but I never really paused to listen to it. The teaching that Jesus lived a sinless life and yet chose to pay for our sins by dying on the cross was the answer I was looking for. I could be forgiven.

    Since then, I walked away from the occult. I learned that my spirit guide was a demon and I had an exorcism done to expel it. (It's nothing like in the movies!) I had the humbling experience of having my entire worldview come crashing down, and having to build up a new worldview, which took several years and was challenging because I had some anti-science Christian friends saying one thing and yet I was a science major and I still believe that the scientific method is the best way to explain physical phenomena. The worldview I ultimately accepted was a blend of scientific teaching and Christian theology.

    I no longer believe I am better than anyone, although Christians who are judgmental still annoy me. I've earned my one-way ticket to Hell many times over. It's only by the blood of Christ that I'm saved, not my anything I've done other than simply accept it. Who am I to judge anyone?
     
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  24. Pipistrele

    Pipistrele Smart batto!

    For me, funnily enough, it was a complete opposite from the poster above - the day I finally settled down with my atheism. On one side, I live in the country with Othrodox Church being a dominating worldview around our populace, and on the other, while I didn't believe in God that much already, as a teenager I was always a bit scared about things like afterlife punishment, or whether we even believe in right religion, and all that stuff. After reading various science books, I eventually became more sure of my beliefs (or lack thereof), and "The God Delusion" by Richard Dawkins was a final nail in the coffin when it came to my religion-related self-doubts, since it offered me a lot of good and detailed answers on all the questions that were in my head on the topic. It's not something I'm usually being an asshole about, of course - it's more something that finally gave me opportunity to sleep well at night. Learning how to be confident in my atheism was very liberating to me .u.
     
  25. Mikazuki Marazhu

    Mikazuki Marazhu Hawaiian Pizza!

    I've changed because of the old FaF members

    Only very few will understand
     

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