Search results

“I respectfully disagree. Though I cannot deny the value of cuteness.”

“No. I just personally wish to be manly. Not because manliness is objectively superior to anything else, just my personal preference. Which is why this EEVEE VIRUS IRKS ME SO—“ *the rest of the letter is blotted by ink spills*

“Sipping? Sounds French and unmanly.”

“Eevees are brown last I checked?” Besides I’m already orange

“Fair enough. But do you have... coffee?” *accepts through window* *burns mouth* I’m not an experienced tea drinker...

“Picard is best captain. Tea is indeed better than Borg.” *laughing too hard to reply*

“Well... I splash potioned me. Ben909 sabotaged the brain bleach I’d acquired to attempt to kill any virus remains within my brain, only to end up introducing infinitely more pathogens.”

“Nay, the Borg were the ultimate adaptability machine, assimilating other species and absorbing their unique technology and attributes for their collective. ...Now I want to see a Borg Eevee. But that’s beside the point! The point is, the only species that managed to thwart them was HUMANITY...

“Very poorly. Trying to enjoy my last hours of humanity. Particularly nasty is that I don’t know how long I’ve left on the clock. And yourself?”

“Monsieur.”

“Ahhh, I love Star Trek TNG! Nice reference! The episodes with the Borg were my favorites. And I’ll have you know that the Borg were wrong about resistance being futile.”

Food poisoning.

“I will never join you. ...in spirit.”

“A. I’m an omnivore and not forced to any particular side, so it’s not betrayal. B. It’s the only way I can get the slightest bit of vengeance on Ben909.” “I don’t remember, but I hope not.”

*contemplates setting principles aside and only fighting for prey just to oppose you*

“I picked a poor day to sleep in. Sounds like I missed a boatload of activity. I pray y’all fare well.”

Welp, this ritual’s off the recipe! We’re only allowed to burn 66k fanfictions at a time, enlightened denizen!

“I know a friend with a dog who jumps on me and does its best to rip me to shreds with its claws (while smiling, happy for the attention and company). I sympathize with the desire to hide.”

“Who are you and what have you done with the real Dergen.”

“Ah, excellent.”