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Small comfort! +1 -17

That’s right! In fact, eating this Vaporeon is endorsed by your local Knight and will earn you commemoration. +1 -16

*fights ceaselessly* +1

*removes helmet* Owwww my ears +1 -14

Hey look, a tasty looking Vaporeon! *points at @ben909* +1

No! My sword! *wins coin flip, smacks you* +1 -12

Ben909 sure as hell ain’t! +1

*is knocked down* Wha—what happened? *tries to stand and slice Ben909* *too dizzy, hurts self* +1 -12

Nooo! More preds?? Why must the universe torment me so? What evil have I committed to deserve this plight? +1 -9

Yea, cuz I found you. *axe swipe* That’s what you get for hiding in a cowardly, dishonorable manner! +1 -9

*lets you have it* *pulls out axe* A good Knight has at least 5 weapons on his person at any given time.

FOUL PLAY! TREACHERY! FIGHT ME LIKE A MAN, YOU COWARD! Yes, I know you aren’t one, my point stands! *walks aimlessly through smoke* +1

Is this some sort of joke to you? How would you feel if you got Eevirused? The continuing, mounting dread over time as you know that slowly, you’re losing your—... *smacks Ben909 harder* +1 -7

Low key that’s brilliant, if I wasn’t pissed I’d probably ask to try some. *continues attacking* +1 -6

I’m not trying to kill you, I’m trying to pound you into submission so you’ll get an early start on helping me retain my apparantly-fragile humanity! *smacks again* +1 -6

Lemme fix that for you. *hits you with the broad side of the sword (AKA False Swipe)* +1 -5

If “spear stab” were a move it would be steel type, yes. But I am not steel, thus the strikethrough text. +1 -4

Fair enough Do I get STAB for attacking with a metal spear while wearing armor? +1 -3

Thank ye kindly. +1 -3

*ponders what a human’s speed stat would be* *gives up* *slowly begins repairing crossbow* +1 -2