Is "coming out" really such a big deal in America?
I live in Wales and I and several friends "came out" as gay/bi at 14. Some parents got slightly freaked out but bullying seems to be more rare here. Only one person I know has been bullied for their sexuality :S
*Probably not right at all but in all honesty it's not taken as lightly as other places.
✞ OFWGKTA ✞
*sigh* I still have to come out :P
Not lookin forward to it terribly, but whatever, it'll work out.
talking to your parents about your boyfriend is much harder than the initial coming out, at least if one of them has hangups
I sorta don't feel any reason to come out to my parents while I'm single. I mean my sex life isn't their business anyway, and if I was dating a guy I actually liked enough to introduce to them that seems like the most obvious time to bring it up.
Well after reading all 130 pages of this thread I guess it's only fair that I at least try to contribute to the discussion. First, though, I have to thank Discord Nova for linking this on page 76. Honestly, that article was actually an answer to a prayer of mine that I've been looking out for for a while, now. For years I've noticed that there really is no argument against homosexuality even though the Bible supposedly condemns it. I wondered if perhaps it was a misinterpretation or even an incorrect translation, and that article actually pointed out AND defended both of these possibilities well.
I myself am bi, and looking back I can see that developing somewhere around when I was 13 or so. However, I didn't really think about my orientation (or relationships in general for that matter) until early May this year (I was 16 then, 17 now). I finally concluded that I am bi a little more than a month ago when I noticed that a longstanding "straight" online friend and I had developed feelings for each other. That was also the time we became long-distance boyfriends. ^_^
After reading this thread, I've decided to come out my closest friend, Allen, when I find an appropriate time. I know he won't mind because I won't be the first bi friend he knows. We actually kinda idolize the other bi guy we know. It doesn't have much to do with him being bi, but the fact that he is known to be bi and is still considered awesome around us is important. There's also the fact that Allen once told me that he suspects our other friend of being bi and hasn't treated him any differently. You may wonder why I feel the need to tell him. My reason is that is the fact that my friends are some of the gayest straight(?) guys I know, and I feel guilty every time they "no-homo" something when I myself am in a gay relationship. They are comfortable with the "gayness" because they're all comfortable in the knowledge that we're all straight, which they don't realize is not entirely true...
However, despite having a boyfriend (which many bi's here have stated as a criteria for coming out to their parents), I am NOT coming out to mine anytime soon. I live smack in the middle of Mississippi, and my parents are both from a small rural town in Louisiana. Just driving to school, I pass by at least seven churches (I probably forgot a couple, so there may be more). In the car, my mom has already told me that she'd kill me if I was gay. I know she was strongly exaggerating (which she does a lot), and it's very unlikely she'd throw me out; but I still get the message. She would NOT approve at all, and I doubt I'd be able to change her mind. The scary thing is that I'm more comfortable telling my mom... I'm more afraid of what my dad would do considering he has never voiced much of an opinion on the matter. You may think this means he may not care, but his dad (my grandfather) regularly rants about LGBT's and how they're some kind of abomination. I don't think my dad feels quite that strongly about the matter, but I don't think the apple fell too far from the tree.
At the very least, I'm not going to come out to my parents until I am entirely independent of them. Thankfully, though, this will be easier for me than others, because I qualify for a LOT of scholarship money. I may actually be paid just to attend, which means I don't rely on parents for my education or future. At the moment, though, it's not worth the risk even though I'd have several places to go if I did get kicked out.
Hehe, sorry about the wall. Despite my attempts to summarize, this still ended up being longer than I intended. xD
I'm starting to think I should finally do it sooner or later...
That'd be a horrible thing for parents to do, luring you out specifically for the purpose of stabbing you in the back. That doesn't sound like something they'd do to you, does it? I personally can't imagine anyone's parents, no matter how homophobic, being THAT cruel; but you know your own parents better than I do. >.>
Eh, I think all celebrities act a bit more flamboyant, on our side of the pond as well. I don't think Brits sound any gayer than Americans. Now the french sound very gay though. I'm not saying this as a stereotypical gun-toting frenchy-hating redneck American. I have endless respect for the french. I like their politics, and I think they're pretty cool, especially when they riot. I also love house. But I can't help it... the language... it really does use a lot of intonations that are considered flamboyant when an english-speaker uses them.Originally Posted by greg-the-fox
They really can't help it. Conversely, German is an incredibly asexual language, and Russian, Italian, and Portuguese are just sexy languages in general.
Last edited by Spatel; 09-25-2011 at 07:30 PM.
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