@Whimsycal @Morning-mouse @Daithi Aaron Radcliff
Okay, I revised Diamonds on a Lake of Silver. Feedback is more than welcome; as I used to say when I would share drafts with other poets: shred it to pieces!
Diamonds On a Lake of Silver
I float alone,
sitting on this lucid lake of sterling silver.
Not a footprint breaks
the immaculate silver snow, bright before me.
The sterile sting of icy iron fills my noble nose,
the only fragrance the freezing cold can carry.
I cast my gaze up the woeful, wizened oak
watching the solar song’s beauty perched playfully.
It waves and wets the cold, crystalline treetops;
showing the diamonds’ rainbow fire freed in the illustrious ice above.
The diamonds formed from last night’s assault of sleet,
slicking the road’s surface and that of the silvery snow.
It bound and bittered the bitumen
causing even careful cars to be crushed.
The breeze blows; it tickles my skin, today,
touching and teasing the tips of the treetops.
It laps the diamonds loose,
leaving them to fall, fragile, broken before me.
Striking the silver, they shatter,
shimmering into existence many millions more dancing diamonds.
Click. Click. Click. The clacking sound surrounds me
as they fall; the broken diamonds’ dust glistens as my evergreen eyes.
Their deaths are birthing new thoughts
just as their births caused other thoughts to cease.
I float alone
watching diamonds dance and die together
lucidly lying upon an unlabyrinthine lake of sterling silver.