Animal Jokes (sorry if it was already posted)

[Juste Wolf]

I was wondering what jokes people have heard about animals.

Like, "A horse walks into a bar, and the bartender ask's him what's with the long face?" or

"A bear walks into a bar, the bartender ask's him how he's doing and the bears like I'm.....Ok." The bartender then ask's whats with the long pause? Then the bear looks at his Paws and says I don't know Ive had them all my life.


(Sorry about loss of punctuation twords the end I got lazy xD)

 

[NekoFox08]

it's funny how jokes this lame are laugh worthy xD

sry, I got none... I grow up around very serious Mormons... scary stuff o_o

 

[Jarz]

Sorry... i just remember one but it's in spanish >.> cant find the words i want to translate it well

 

[x_panther]

its sorta animal related XD

a judge walks out of his chambers, his robe partially unzipped as the bailiff calls the empty courtroom to order. the judge plops down in his leather chair and looks at the bailiff at the back of the courtroom "im at a loss, my schedule for today is missing. call in the first case." A man walks into the room and up to the judge. "youll have to pardon me, but my schedule is missing. whats youre name?"

'david, sir'

"and what are you here for?"

david blushed brighty, 'well, i was arested for blowing bubbles in the park.'

the judge blinked, looked at the balif at his right which shrugged. "well then... this seems a bit of a waist of my time. your free to go. the court secritary will have the forms for you to sign." david sighed sharply but didnt say a word as he quickly scooted out of the court room. "Balif, next case." a blind man with his german shepard service dog walks into the court guiding himself with a cane. "youll have to excuse me sir, but my docket is missing. whats your name?"

'John'

"well john, what are you here for?"

'well, im here because of my dog caused some problems'

"oh? whats your dogs name?"

'Bubbles'

 

[Beastcub]

why did the circus lion eat the tight-rope walker?
.....he wanted a balanced breakfast

what is red and green and goes about 1000 miles an hour
.....a frog in a blender

one snake asked the other snake "hey..um are poisonous?"
the other snake asks "why?"
the first snake pauses and says "i just bit my tongue...."

 

[pheonix]

its sorta animal related XD

a judge walks out of his chambers, his robe partially unzipped as the bailiff calls the empty courtroom to order. the judge plops down in his leather chair and looks at the bailiff at the back of the courtroom "im at a loss, my schedule for today is missing. call in the first case." A man walks into the room and up to the judge. "youll have to pardon me, but my schedule is missing. whats youre name?"

'david, sir'

"and what are you here for?"

david blushed brighty, 'well, i was arested for blowing bubbles in the park.'

the judge blinked, looked at the balif at his right which shrugged. "well then... this seems a bit of a waist of my time. your free to go. the court secritary will have the forms for you to sign." david sighed sharply but didnt say a word as he quickly scooted out of the court room. "Balif, next case." a blind man with his german shepard service dog walks into the court guiding himself with a cane. "youll have to excuse me sir, but my docket is missing. whats your name?"

'John'

"well john, what are you here for?"

'well, im here because of my dog caused some problems'

"oh? whats your dogs name?"

'Bubbles'

this joke is great I lold for awhile I wish I knew some but I'm dry on animal jokes.

 

[Juste Wolf]

Haha those are all pretty good ones. I'll have to try them out sometime