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MetalWolfBruh
Guest
Less interactions, more distractions.
Anyone else who is suffering from crippling loneliness?
- Thread starter AceQuorthon
- Start date
AceQuorthon
International Man of Mystery
God I’m so alone, I’m so so alone. I don’t wanna be alone anymore, I want to feel happiness and like I belong somewhere for once.
AceQuorthon
International Man of Mystery
I’m having such a terrible anxiety attack right now
Tallow_Phoenix
Totally not a vampire
*hugs the goat* you wanna talk about it?
AceQuorthon
International Man of Mystery
Everything just feels wrong, like every thing I’ve ever done in my entire life. I feel so worthless and ugly like a piece of garbage. Nothing means anything to me.
Tallow_Phoenix
Totally not a vampire
Ouch, that's all too familiar a feeling for me.
There's no good advice I can give besides to push through it, maybe take a nap or alternatively work on something that will improve yourself, like art or programming (that's what I do, anyways). Just stay safe, okay?
AceQuorthon
International Man of Mystery
I’ll try my bestOuch, that's all too familiar a feeling for me.
PercyD
Lover of Beasty Baes
I know that feel~. I have seasonal depression around this time every year. Myself, I try to rationalize through it. The weather is changing, everyone is trying to get things done before the holiday, so its harder to just hang out.
Take your time and be easy on yourself~~
Take your time and be easy on yourself~~
Nintencats
I gained all of the levels. ALL of them.
I relate so much to this thread I am terrible at talking to people so I feel unable to start conversations or make friends with anyone. I tend to feel like people only interact with me when they have to or out of pity, which is ridiculous and probably not true but that doesn’t stop my brain from telling me that. Even online I feel unable to connect with anyone and usually drift from one site to another without getting to know anyone, which I’m really trying to change.
I hope y’all can feel better sometime, even if I can’t really say anything to help
*hugs everyone in thread*
I am terrible at talking to people so I feel unable to start conversations or make friends with anyone. I tend to feel like people only interact with me when they have to or out of pity, which is ridiculous and probably not true but that doesn’t stop my brain from telling me that. Even online I feel unable to connect with anyone and usually drift from one site to another without getting to know anyone, which I’m really trying to change.I hope y’all can feel better sometime, even if I can’t really say anything to help
*hugs everyone in thread*
AceQuorthon
International Man of Mystery
Hope everyone is having a good day
Foxy Emy
Polygenic DID System. Life is wild.
I was very much the same way at age 21. I felt like I lost all my friends to physical distance or to marriage.
It was kind of a period of change and uncertainty in my life where I struggled to figure out the whole adulting thing while losing friends and not having a stable job where I could make new ones. 21 sucked almost as much as high school did.
It was kind of a period of change and uncertainty in my life where I struggled to figure out the whole adulting thing while losing friends and not having a stable job where I could make new ones. 21 sucked almost as much as high school did.
Cosmonaughty
Finally comfortable in my fur!
Ive been alone since I was 19. I only recently began to realise how much of my life had slipped away! My friends wouldnt understand, my love life is none existant and I cant seem to fix the problems with my confidence! This forum has helped, but Im beginning to notice that we are all a little lost!
Just gonna put it out there, I had a moment of despair on my birthday a few days ago!
This is so god damn relatable. I miss comfort! Im embarassed to mention it, but recently turning gay has really messed me up. Seriousely if you (or indeed anyone) wants to talk about it, please dont hesitate to give me a shout! Ive discovered helping other people to be like a form of self therapy!
I dont like seeing people this lonely! Please dont be, my heart goes out to you all! I love every one of you!
Just gonna put it out there, I had a moment of despair on my birthday a few days ago!
This is so god damn relatable. I miss comfort! Im embarassed to mention it, but recently turning gay has really messed me up. Seriousely if you (or indeed anyone) wants to talk about it, please dont hesitate to give me a shout! Ive discovered helping other people to be like a form of self therapy!
I dont like seeing people this lonely! Please dont be, my heart goes out to you all! I love every one of you!
Water Draco
Well-Known Member
It can be hard but things are always moving and nothing stays in the same place.
Friendships change over time for many reasons. And although it is daunting it is important to find ways to go out and meet others.
I have found that this fandom can help with this by traveling to meets and getting to know others.
Friendships change over time for many reasons. And although it is daunting it is important to find ways to go out and meet others.
I have found that this fandom can help with this by traveling to meets and getting to know others.
dragon-in-sight
mane diva
I also live a quite solitary life lately. Most of my family relatives are dead and I don't have an own family or mate to share my life with. But at the same time I don't feel lonely. I'm used to be on my own and enjoy the freedom and peace this kind of life brings with it. I never was a party or adventure kind of guy. But at least I have some good friends that visite me from time to time on a cup of tea and some talks. That's all I need.
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SLB-Portu23
Guest
Without close irl friendships and no means to get in personal contact with the community, yeah, its hard to feel any other way. I can't do much with the online aspect alone unfortunately, there's not a lot of material to build around. "I'm good friend's with X person just because they're nice"...this never actually happens as far as friendships go, people become close because they share interests and visions on top of whatever character traits each one might possess. I have little in common with most of the people I've met at this point so there lays an harsh lullaby for remaining in the cold grasp of loneliness.
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MetalWolfBruh
Guest
This. It feels like my existence is merely to upset people, or make them feel uncomfortable one way or another. And on top of that, having myself and everything/one around me crumble apart in every way imaginable while I have fewer people to lean on as time goes on.
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MetalWolfBruh
Guest
What pisses me off is when not being in the right state of mind and people see you acting a little off, and then they get mad at you or uncomfortable, instead of acknowledging that the behavior is influenced by negative emotions or mental illness, they just use that to belittle you even more and call you a freak to others behind your back. Or, like when doctors see me nervous and anxious, they get mad at me and blow me off instead of trying to be understanding, being mad at me for being nervous, like I'm intentionally trying to annoy them, that should be a fucking clue for you to help me. Yeah, it's a very lonely world, and no second chances, because once you made the wrong impression the first time, you have to face some sort of repercussions and/or neglect.
I have crippling depression.
And loneliness.
Sometimes I wish the world just ended. I have felt so much hate, towards others and towards myself.
Sometimes I feel like I just don't fit. No, even worse than that, I feel like I'm a walking disappointment. I feel like I should have never been born. Like I don't belong anywhere.
The pain is mild but it's breaking my mind. I hope I don't have a soul, that way if I die I can just disappear and end this suffering that is existing.
But hey, sometimes it gets better
And loneliness.
Sometimes I wish the world just ended. I have felt so much hate, towards others and towards myself.
Sometimes I feel like I just don't fit. No, even worse than that, I feel like I'm a walking disappointment. I feel like I should have never been born. Like I don't belong anywhere.
The pain is mild but it's breaking my mind. I hope I don't have a soul, that way if I die I can just disappear and end this suffering that is existing.
But hey, sometimes it gets better
Heppi
The happy one~
It may sound strange, but I feel even more lonely since I'm active within the fandom. I can endure so much physical pain, but the loneliness is like tearing me apart. And participating in a community makes me realize that even more. I met some really nice people, but in the end everyone lives their own lifes, which means we are alone most of the time anyway. My realization is, that no one really cares about me or you, because that is natural. For the most part. People talked about this before and probably will always do. What do you do when you realize nobody truly cares about you? - Quora
It's easier for me to accept the reality and actually being alone, than trying to not be alone and feel even worse because of it.
I guess a lot of people struggle with feels like this. An artist whose art will not receive attention... A musician... Really, it could be everyone. We are hoping to find something and exactly that hope is the reason why we feel the despair. It's probably better to live a life without expectations. How can we feel happy, when we always want something that we not have? Blending everything else out because of it.
Hope sucks. I'm tired of it.
It's easier for me to accept the reality and actually being alone, than trying to not be alone and feel even worse because of it.
I guess a lot of people struggle with feels like this. An artist whose art will not receive attention... A musician... Really, it could be everyone. We are hoping to find something and exactly that hope is the reason why we feel the despair. It's probably better to live a life without expectations. How can we feel happy, when we always want something that we not have? Blending everything else out because of it.
Hope sucks. I'm tired of it.
Z
Z-ro
Guest
I couldn't agree more to be honest, cause he's right
MissNook
Well-Known Member
@Heppi
I may be wrong but don't you think that being part of a community here or in real life is something that allows you to have a place to share things? Like you just did actually.
It can make us meet new people and they can actually become friends. And even if I think that online friends are great, I think that to actually meet the people in real life is what brings you really close to each other. And well that's how a online community can help to ease your loneliness in my opinion.
I've met my closest IRL friends and my boyfriend in or thanks to online communities. I'm not that good to make friends IRL but finding people with common tastes or interests really helped me to overcome the shyness of meeting new people. Since we had all the keys to have a conversation with all our common interests I could overcome the anxiousness of not having anything to say, of being too weird for "normal" people and so on. (and yeah I tried to imagine the conversation we would have for hours and feeling all anxious about meeting them for hours too but I always chose public places and often meetings with more than one people to feel safe enough to go and it went well most of the time)
And I agree that we all live our own lives, that's normal. In real life too you won't stay all the day with your friends, you and them have usually other things to do and other people to see. But in my opinion that's great because it's great to talk to a lot of different people and not stay stuck in your own world! I guess you also have times where you want to do your things and not have someone disturbing you.
I don't know you personally but I've found people here that I feel can become friends one day. And I care for them even if I feel like we need a lot more time to build a friendship.
There are a lot of cares degrees in my opinion. So what do you mean by "really" cares? Does that mean that if I care about you as a human person that seems desperate, I'm not caring enough?
You said in the end that living a life without expectation is a way to feel less desperate. I would say that depends. If you don't have any expectations, you may stop doing projects and trying to improve things you would have wanted to improve. But maybe some of the things that make you anxious are actually what is keeping you from living things and that having too much expectations make you feel disappointed in your everyday life.
I often think of what is the worse that could happen for something. Not over-thinking it (well I try at least), just keeping it in a side of my head. Then I live that something and I'm usually not disappointed since it goes better than what I had thought. And I often don't make expectations cause a lot of things that happen to me are just not things I can have any control over so it's kinda a waste of time. I just go with the flow trying to have just organized myself about the things I have control over. For example when I go see my family, I take care of my bag, my stuff, my train tickets. I call all the people who should know I'm going and I go 1 hour ahead of time to be sure I'll catch the train. Then if there's a issue with the train, well I just keep my calm and wait. Nothing I can do to change that so I don't bother too much (just calling my family so they would know I'm late).
To summarize I think that having expectations on what you can change is good, and for the rest going with the flow is less anxiety-provoking in my opinion.
I may be wrong but don't you think that being part of a community here or in real life is something that allows you to have a place to share things? Like you just did actually.
It can make us meet new people and they can actually become friends. And even if I think that online friends are great, I think that to actually meet the people in real life is what brings you really close to each other. And well that's how a online community can help to ease your loneliness in my opinion.
I've met my closest IRL friends and my boyfriend in or thanks to online communities. I'm not that good to make friends IRL but finding people with common tastes or interests really helped me to overcome the shyness of meeting new people. Since we had all the keys to have a conversation with all our common interests I could overcome the anxiousness of not having anything to say, of being too weird for "normal" people and so on. (and yeah I tried to imagine the conversation we would have for hours and feeling all anxious about meeting them for hours too but I always chose public places and often meetings with more than one people to feel safe enough to go and it went well most of the time)
And I agree that we all live our own lives, that's normal. In real life too you won't stay all the day with your friends, you and them have usually other things to do and other people to see. But in my opinion that's great because it's great to talk to a lot of different people and not stay stuck in your own world! I guess you also have times where you want to do your things and not have someone disturbing you.
I don't know you personally but I've found people here that I feel can become friends one day. And I care for them even if I feel like we need a lot more time to build a friendship.
There are a lot of cares degrees in my opinion. So what do you mean by "really" cares? Does that mean that if I care about you as a human person that seems desperate, I'm not caring enough?
You said in the end that living a life without expectation is a way to feel less desperate. I would say that depends. If you don't have any expectations, you may stop doing projects and trying to improve things you would have wanted to improve. But maybe some of the things that make you anxious are actually what is keeping you from living things and that having too much expectations make you feel disappointed in your everyday life.
I often think of what is the worse that could happen for something. Not over-thinking it (well I try at least), just keeping it in a side of my head. Then I live that something and I'm usually not disappointed since it goes better than what I had thought. And I often don't make expectations cause a lot of things that happen to me are just not things I can have any control over so it's kinda a waste of time. I just go with the flow trying to have just organized myself about the things I have control over. For example when I go see my family, I take care of my bag, my stuff, my train tickets. I call all the people who should know I'm going and I go 1 hour ahead of time to be sure I'll catch the train. Then if there's a issue with the train, well I just keep my calm and wait. Nothing I can do to change that so I don't bother too much (just calling my family so they would know I'm late).
To summarize I think that having expectations on what you can change is good, and for the rest going with the flow is less anxiety-provoking in my opinion.
Heppi
The happy one~
Man... I feel like I should apologize for my latest reply. It wasn't helpful at all.
The Forum is a good place to find people, but I still think it is not enough to fight against the loneliness. I understand now that having friends, people you can directly talk to, is really important. At least that's what helped me to fight against the pessimistic thoughts.
If anyone still feels lonely or is looking for someone to chat with, I'm here. Hit me up and let's just write on Discord. I think a direct chat is so much better, especially with this kind of feelings.
The Forum is a good place to find people, but I still think it is not enough to fight against the loneliness. I understand now that having friends, people you can directly talk to, is really important. At least that's what helped me to fight against the pessimistic thoughts.
If anyone still feels lonely or is looking for someone to chat with, I'm here. Hit me up and let's just write on Discord.
I think a direct chat is so much better, especially with this kind of feelings.