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coffee wars

Red_Lion _

Member
Somethin' weird happened this morning.

I was in the kitchen pouring myself some coffee and I stopped to put a splash of milk in it when my mom came stomping over to yell at me. At first I didn't know what she was so bent out of shape about then she started going on about how I was drinking my coffee wrong. Apparently I'm supposed to use creamer and not milk. Milk is wrong! Milk is bad! Milk is incorrect! And she kept badgering me until I poured out my coffee and got a new cup, which I opted to just drink black. Apparently this is also wrong as she shoved past me and tried to pour cream in it. I put my hand over my cup and told her it would be milk or nothing. She insisted one more time that you don't put milk in coffee, that's what cream is for. I told her no cream one more time and she stomped off, knocking a bag of apples off of the bar on her way out. As I returned to my computer chair it hit me how absolutely stupid everything was. A cup of coffee shouldn't be a source of controversy. I just don't even....

What the actual fuck.
 
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Charrio

Artistic Mouse
You better be buttering your bread right side up too!
It's stuff like this that starts wars.

Shit! Now I'm just pissed....I'm going to go punch my cat for this, Thanks!

Seriously, it's to the drinker's tastes.
I like mine with cream and sugar, but no creme milk works too.
I have to use splenda too since I'm a type2 diabetic
 
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Red_Lion _

Member
I tend to use milk because the creamer we get is too thick and too sweet for my liking, even a small amount seems to dominate the cup and leave an unpleasant thickness behind it when I drink. I use a splash of milk purely to curb the acidic sourness that most coffee has without diluting the flavor overly much and I generally skip the sugar all together. My coffee is serious business yo.

But yeah, I'm still trying to process this whatthefuckery that took place at the coffee maker this morning.
 

Astrium

King of the Noodles
That is basically me with people who put sugar in cornbread.
 

Crunchy_Bat

Incoherent Babble Master
That sounds about right, family arguments are always stupid as shit in my experience. Just the other day when I was visiting my mother I got a scolding for putting on sunblock inside, apparently, you do it outside, and ONLY outside. It amazed me how long she was able to yell about it. wtf.
 

Red_Lion _

Member
That sounds about right, family arguments are always stupid as shit in my experience. Just the other day when I was visiting my mother I got a scolding for putting on sunblock inside, apparently, you do it outside, and ONLY outside. It amazed me how long she was able to yell about it. wtf.


Families: making molehills into mountains is what they do best.
 

jtrekkie

Feathered
I use milk, either powdered or regular, for the simple reason that I am too cheap to buy cream. Even artificial creamer is too good for me. I don't use sugar because I'm too lazy to get it out of the cabinet.
 

Astrium

King of the Noodles
I used to drink the shit out of coffee as a kid, and then when I was about five my parents cut me off. I can't stand the stuff now, I can never get it sweet enough.
 

Red_Lion _

Member
I use milk, either powdered or regular, for the simple reason that I am too cheap to buy cream. Even artificial creamer is too good for me. I don't use sugar because I'm too lazy to get it out of the cabinet.

Cream is overrated and sugar is for pussies!

I used to drink the shit out of coffee as a kid, and then when I was about five my parents cut me off. I can't stand the stuff now, I can never get it sweet enough.

Embrace the bitterness! I actually like the bitter coffee flavor. Unless it's iced coffee, for some reason I find I prefer that to be sweet.
 

DoomsdayBear

New Member
Cream is just a heavier, more sweet version of milk.

I don't use cream often because of how sweet it is, gotta be milk. My parents use powdered cream, I feel like I'd be drinking powdered clumps if I tried it.
 

Zop

hai guiz wuts goin on in hur
How anyone gets that upset over a beverage is beyond me.

You should tell her that coffee elitists often used frothed milk. That's more or less what cappuccinos and lattes are made with.
 

Gator

Uncledaddy
i'm just waiting for the day the men with the butterfly nets come looking for that one.

my own mother was similar. i was making lunch for school and she came up and threw a fit at me because i didn't put mayonnaise on my sandwich. i don't fucking like mayo, never have. but she took the damn sandwich and put mayo on it. that and american cheese, which i also hated. needless to say, i didn't eat much those days. she also acted like i was crazy when i tried to eat tuna without adding mayonnaise. "YOU DON'T DO THAT, NOBODY DOES THAT" this bitch and her mayonnaise... my first childhood attempt at cooking box macaroni ended in tears, because i apparently wasn't doing that her way, either. and i got a broken finger from my stepdad when i wasn't washing the kitchen counter just right. then i'd get yelled at for the order in which i removed things from the dishwasher... list goes on.

i don't understand control freak parents who need everything done THEIR way. i really don't. nor do i think people like that should be allowed to raise kids in the first place. and you being a fucking adult? i'd pour my damn coffee in her face.
 

Red_Lion _

Member
Yeah, the coffee thing is a pretty small deal compared to other things she's done in the past. Personally I don't understand why anyone would care about things like how you eat or food or drink your beverages. Parents who need that much control over their child don't need to have children. I can't think of any reason they'd be so controlling unless they have something seriously wrong with them mentally. You don't make someone eat mayonnaise, you don't make them put cream in their coffee. Anyone who feels a NEED to do that is fucked in the head.
 

Torrijos-sama

The Artist Formerly Known as Jesusfish
No creamer, no milk, no sugar or sweeteners.

I enjoy my coffee as burnt water, thank you.
 

Jambalaya

Member
Somethin' weird happened this morning.

I was in the kitchen pouring myself some coffee and I stopped to put a splash of milk in it when my mom came stomping over to yell at me. At first I didn't know what she was so bent out of shape about then she started going on about how I was drinking my coffee wrong. Apparently I'm supposed to use creamer and not milk. Milk is wrong! Milk is bad! Milk is incorrect! And she kept badgering me until I poured out my coffee and got a new cup, which I opted to just drink black. Apparently this is also wrong as she shoved past me and tried to pour cream in it. I put my hand over my cup and told her it would be milk or nothing. She insisted one more time that you don't put milk in coffee, that's what cream is for. I told her no cream one more time and she stomped off, knocking a bag of apples off of the bar on her way out. As I returned to my computer chair it hit me how absolutely stupid everything was. A cup of coffee shouldn't be a source of controversy. I just don't even....

What the actual fuck.

I'm lactose intolerant, but I don't go for either creamer or milk. I drop a piece of dark chocolate into the brew and that serves as my "sweetener" and acid killer.

The real question is what was your mother really mad about that she had to project it at your coffee habits?

That is basically me with people who put sugar in cornbread.

As a southern girl it is honey or nothing, sugar does not belong in cornbread. *prepares for inevitable cornbread fallout*
 

Red_Lion _

Member
No creamer, no milk, no sugar or sweeteners.

I enjoy my coffee as burnt water, thank you.

You heathen >8[

I'm lactose intolerant, but I don't go for either creamer or milk. I drop a piece of dark chocolate into the brew and that serves as my "sweetener" and acid killer.

The real question is what was your mother really mad about that she had to project it at your coffee habits?



As a southern girl it is honey or nothing, sugar does not belong in cornbread. *prepares for inevitable cornbread fallout*

the dark chocolate thing actually sounds good. Once I added a cup of strong coffee in place of a cup of water for a brownie mix recipe. It turned out to be a great decision and I try to do that for every batch I make.

And I have given up trying to figure out what her problem is. I'm moving out as soon as possible and then she won't be my problem anymore.

Cornbread in general is just good, I like mine with some cinnamon or red pepper. Never both at the same time though.
 

Mikazuki Marazhu

I hate you all
I read on a men's magazine that cow's milk is not designed for human consumption. Studies shows that 1 out of 4 children develop allergies to it.


BUT FUCK IT! I'M STILL USING MILK FOR EVERYTHING!
 

Gator

Uncledaddy
I read on a men's magazine that cow's milk is not designed for human consumption. Studies shows that 1 out of 4 children develop allergies to it.


BUT FUCK IT! I'M STILL USING MILK FOR EVERYTHING!

you need to switch to almond milk like us civilized people, mara
 
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