Coming Out: The Thread (Continued)
- Thread starter Surgat
- Start date
Arterian21
New Member
Still IN the blasted closet im afraid. Looking for a way to break out but honestly, I have no idea what id be doing then. Not an extrovert, not a bar going guy, dont like dancing, etc. And being the only gay guy ive ever known means I have no gaydar whatsoever.
Theres always an LGBT community center on the other side of the freaking city >.<...maybe one day ill work up the courage to go inside and...well...id...tbh i haven't the faintest idea what I would do after that. Should i? Or just go in and improv from then? oh well, at least nowadays im in a position where i can at least consider HOW im going to come out. Rather than figuring out ways to hide it.
Theres always an LGBT community center on the other side of the freaking city >.<...maybe one day ill work up the courage to go inside and...well...id...tbh i haven't the faintest idea what I would do after that. Should i? Or just go in and improv from then? oh well, at least nowadays im in a position where i can at least consider HOW im going to come out. Rather than figuring out ways to hide it.
Mullerornis
Active Member
Hope you get the confidence you need.
Ranguvar
Member
IDK, I like my closet, it's warm and cozy.
Ricky
Well-Known Member
Usually they host social events.
I'd go to something that looks interesting and socialize with the people you meet, there.
They probably have a calendar. You should go ask ^^
Artillery Spam
Member
Butters Shikkon
Patron Saint of Queers
Deep man. Also, good to see you back on faf again.
Schwimmwagen
Well-Known Member
...what were you dressed like?
Ryuu
Member
Jeans...shirt.... nothing bad considering the job i was applying for was a labor intensive job. She stared like i was wearing a fur suit. hahahaha
CatterHatter
The Grain of Salt
This... this made my night. Oh hell.
CatterHatter
The Grain of Salt
Cool, congrats man!
Alright, I posted on here a long time ago. Here's an update.
I have told a few people now that I am gay in this order: my girlfriend, my twin, a good friend, and my mom.
Just trying to take it a step at a time since I am too shy and introverted to just announce it to everyone. So far the main thing impeding my progress is worries about my father. He's a preacher... so yeah...
As for the other people I have told: my girlfriend took it surprisingly well and we are still really good friends. My twin, well, I only did not tell her sooner cause she does not have the best track record of keeping things to herself. After I told her, she told two of her friends, and then her boyfriend later without talking to me about it. Thankfully, it does not seem to be a big deal. My mom... well that was tougher. She is antagonistic and tells me I am in sin and all that. If that was all, it really would not bother me but she had to go and say that my boyfriend and I CAN'T be in love because it's not natural and it's all about sex and that my boyfriend can support me.
Thanks mom for throwing my nearly five year relationship in the trash. And straight people don't have relationships based only on sex or money? I don't expect her to understand, but it does hurt a little that she would demean my boyfriend and I being together just because she does not approve. She tells me I'm not gay and that this is just a phase I'm going to go through. I told her that it would only hurt her and I both if she stayed in denial. It hurt me for long enough dealing with my own denial.
Anyway, that aside. I'm still dealing with moral ramifications since I am a Christian, but at the same time much of me does not feel like my boyfriend and I being together is wrong. He is the sweetest guy I know and truly cares for me and what is best for me. We are romantic and intimate, and we always work things out if we argue or have any problems. So even with my doubts I can't give him up. :}
I'll just keep trying to choose the right time and right people to tell so I can get out of this damn "closet."
EDIT: Oh, and to add... I do have some trouble dealing with other gay men if they are well... fruity. I'm not a homophobe, believe me I've gotten over that, it is just I personally do not like when people act out. It makes me uncomfortable and this applies to any form of acting out. Talking with a lisp, having floppy wrists, calling other guys "girlfriend," and so on, many times I feel like it is just a form of acting out and calling attention to oneself. So this keeps me from befriending some gay guys.
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Mullerornis
Active Member
Just learn hebrew and greek and you'll see that the Bible originally was not homophobic.
Then again, I fail to see why someone would preffer dogma over free spirituality.
CatterHatter
The Grain of Salt
EDIT: Oh, misunderstood something. My connotation for dogma (specific application of certain rules in a religion by a group) clashed with its denotation in this context. I assume now that you mean dogma as in any organized religion with rules versus free spiritual exploration and growth? I dunno man. I've accepted Christ; simple as that.
I'm just trying to eschew backwards things I was taught as a child from having a dogmatic preacher for a father. I'd love to learn other languages. Hebrew and Greek would be great, and I also want to learn French and Japanese. Maybe Gaelic, but it seems even more complicated to me than Japanese. Just gotta take the time out to learn other languages. I do know some Latin and Greek, but just a lot of words not how their grammatical rules work.
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septango
ᴓᴥᴓ
im fairly certain thats just a cry for attention, otherwise idk i've only ever met one person like that and most gays i've met are just regular folk
Mullerornis
Active Member
To me, dogma is restrictive to actual growth and even connection to the divine. But do as you please.
What I mean is that in hebrew and greek those verses are hilariously non-homophobic. Learn the languages that build the Bible, and you'll be a much less conflicted person.
Saiko
GTWT Survivor
So... last week my dad linked me to this: http://www.catholicnewsagency.com/r...sexual-condition-can-it-be-changed-prevented/.
I got home Saturday night, and they had me crying withing three hours...
I got home Saturday night, and they had me crying withing three hours...
Ranguvar
Member
"Male homosexuality, though, often involves extremely promiscuous sex; sometimes one mate has hundreds of sexual partners over a lifetime. Male homosexual practices include mutual masturbation, oral sex, and anal intercourse."
Awesome. Oh and fuck this bitch and the pseudoscience she references. I ain't homosex because my parents were failures or I didn't go to church enough. I don't need to be cured nor does any other gay person.
Saiko
GTWT Survivor
Not one thing in that article describes me, and they should know that. :/
Dazreiello
Incomprehensible horror. DRAGON
Yea, it really isn't some choice you pop out of nowhere someday in your life. I believe your estrogen levels determine that from birth and there isn't really anything you can do about that, or rather there isn't anything you SHOULD do about it. Alot of people just need to accept that homosexuality is something that comes with you from birth, atleast more often than not. My brother is a proud homosexual, while I'm practically 100% hetero and raised in christian environments, I've NEVER judged him or anyone for that even when I first found out.
I believe science has a lot to say about how Homosexuality isn't something you just do, or something you can just get out of, and I believe if there is a God, the God I know wouldnt give a damn and love his homosexual children all the same.
BadgerBrox
New Member
Well, I came out rather a long time ago.
I told my Mum when I was 17, apparently she'd known since I was 10 - which is interesting as I didn't know at that time! I didn't tell my Dad til I was 19 cos he'd always made homophobic comments - turned out he did them in jest. I never told my Nana technically but she knows...
I didn't come out at school as the 5th formers and younger really bullied a sixth-former when he came out. And despite my year (the 5th formers) being bad at that time, they've all been fine since; turned out 17 out of a year group of 91 were gay or gay-leaning bisexuals (all boys school)...
At uni I came out in second term in general, although some knew in first term. Never really a problem. It helped that my college chaplain was gay I think.
I am still hesitant at coming out at another church I go to, though many know, because my partner is worried how a lot of people there would react.
And I have found myself of late as a sort of coming-out agony aunt for younger friends.
I told my Mum when I was 17, apparently she'd known since I was 10 - which is interesting as I didn't know at that time! I didn't tell my Dad til I was 19 cos he'd always made homophobic comments - turned out he did them in jest. I never told my Nana technically but she knows...
I didn't come out at school as the 5th formers and younger really bullied a sixth-former when he came out. And despite my year (the 5th formers) being bad at that time, they've all been fine since; turned out 17 out of a year group of 91 were gay or gay-leaning bisexuals (all boys school)...
At uni I came out in second term in general, although some knew in first term. Never really a problem. It helped that my college chaplain was gay I think.
I am still hesitant at coming out at another church I go to, though many know, because my partner is worried how a lot of people there would react.
And I have found myself of late as a sort of coming-out agony aunt for younger friends.
T
TheMetalVelocity
Guest
I actually looked at fursuit pictures with dicks sticking out of them and I liked it. That's really closest I can become to being attracted to guys, but other than that, once the fursuit's off, then it's a turn off.