Anyway, my own little update. My family don't even believe me when I say I'm gay anymore. :/ They seem to be in denial of the whole idea. It's one thing when they accept it or hate me for it, but when they pretend it doesn't exist... That hurts, in some kind of strange, horrid way. ._.
This all may kinda seem obvious, but I think it still helps to have it all written out plainly.
I think there are two things you can do, the goal being to get them to come out of denial. You can either basically throw it in their face and do something to make it impossible for them to deny it, or you can let them come to gradually. The former would solve the problem quickly, but it more likely will result in them hating you for it or at least getting upset to some degree. You say this would be an improvement over them pretending it doesn't exist, and this indeed would more quickly relieve some of that particular kind of pain; but it'd still likely replace it with another kind.
Letting them come to will be harder. It'll take longer, and during that time you'll still have to endure the pain of them ignoring it - possibly just for them to end up still hating it anyway. However, I think it has a better chance of them accepting, or at least tolerating, it.
Although this sounds rather harsh and unhelpful, I'd just endure for now. Don't force anything on them. Let it sit for a few weeks, maybe a few months - however long it takes to let tensions drop some. Perhaps after that, talk to them one-on-one if you can get a chance. I think you said you were more comfortable with your mom, so start with her. Calmly sit down with her and talk to her about her concerns. Listen to her talk about her; keep the topic away from yourself if you can. See if you can find any common ground. Perhaps you both can't stand flamers. If so, see if you can use that to get your foot in the door. If you need to, it may not hurt to exaggerate your opinion on that common ground. Perhaps flamers annoy you a little, but they piss her off. Exaggerate how much they annoy you, so she doesn't feel too alienated.
One way to look at it is to basically "try again." Try to come out again, just... a bit differently. This time may work better.