Are you some kind of therapist?
Given his posting history, I'd wager a giant "NO" there.
I was sad, friends helped me see i was looking only
at one option the, worst one.
Saw my error and am making a real effort to not do
the same mistake again.
I do have a mental ilness too, chronic depression and anxiety. Diagnosed by doctors, not by myself at the internet lol.Ummm...I'm a little too ashamed to discuss my personal experience with depression and mental illness
Me said:There is a reason I try not to talk to people.
To me, all conversations are basically defusing bombs. I feel like I have no free will in social settings. Because in most incidences where I try to speak with my own words, I end up "triggering" them and I get outed by the entire group for being "offensive". Then I usually wish I could just kill myself then and there. And it not just irl either. Hell, there are times even on this forum that I wanted to blow my skull in half.
If you knew. God, if you knew the feeling. The abyss in your stomach, the lump in your throat, the tightness in your jaw. Reading negative responses to my freedom of speech only gives me three little words to have liberty to think:
I hate myself. It's true. It's something I think daily now. But do you know the punch line to this joke, though? I have it all going for me. Eagle scout, honor student, plenty of money, popular kid in high school, confirmed lutheran. Hell, Buzz Aldrin sent me a letter to come to Boston for some elite science programs.
And you know what?
I'm starting to not care.
Because this world has become toxic. This world has become a place where I can get offended by everyone around me, but if I do the same to someone else, I become demonized and banished. All I can do is watch as my confidence in whats "right" diminish.
Eventually, no wait, less than that, I might lose it. I want to lock myself away in a room somewhere. Where I don't have to be with anyone, where there won't be anyone to offend by accident. A place where I can think freely, without you people turning my mouth against me.
Fuck, why am I writing this?
Why am I breaking my personal silence?
And posting it to a confessions thread?
This isn't a statement, not even a rant.
It's just me, arguing with myself.
I'm not advocating for (omitted)'s rights nor your rights to be angry at him. It's just that I've been in times where I feel that everyone hates me because I say something out of the norm. Because I don't fit their expectations as a human being. Because I sometimes want to have a little fun.
I can talk about rape and rape humor casually.
There, I said it. Go ahead, destroy me. Call (omitted) or I disrespectful. It's not like I'm going to be listening.
Or be even here to hear it.
Sparta said:Because this world has become toxic. This world has become a place where I can get offended by everyone around me, but if I do the same to someone else, I become demonized and banished. All I can do is watch as my confidence in whats "right" diminish.
Battlechili1;5173766 [/I said:[/COLOR][/COLOR]Holy shit. This is sort of how I felt earlier today. I got really down in the dumps over some Tumblr post that made me upset and I tried to reasonably argue about it and then got attacked for it. I felt awful.
I pissed off some people, got harassed and junk. Later I responded with something like "I'm done, goodbye," stopped posting and changed my user title to DEAD for the weekend. I cried myself to sleep that night.