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Does anyone know how to get over a deep period of loneliness

Kope

Artist?
Banned
Been alone all my life and was wondering if anyone has a good strategy to counteract the despairing feelings that come along with it.
 

Raever

Chaotic Neutral Wreckage
I've always been good at amusing myself and keeping myself entertained, but even I occasionally get lonely - though I theorize it doesn't happen as much to me when compared to the average individual. Normally when I feel that way, I start watching really nostalgic cartoons or playing a really engrossing video game. It may not be the healthiest thing to do, but it does make me feel better and allows me to enjoy something. Which to me, is better than just sitting around and being sad.
 
D

Deleted member 127940

Guest
Make friends or acquire a significant other. The former is typically done by meeting people through work or a recreational activity of your choosing; the latter is done by finding someone who you fancy. Significant others are usually happened upon by using online dating mediums or IRL channels. Trying to mute feelings of loneliness with gaming, drinking, or excessive drug use are not viable long-term solutions. If you're actively combating your feelings of loneliness by doing one or more of the aforementioned things (or even something that falls within the "blissful distraction" category), stop doing that thing immediately and change up your strategy.

Honestly, this is one of those questions that has one or two direct solutions but the methods one has to employ to reach those solutions are multifaceted and "user-specific".
 

KnightsSorrow

Well-Known Member
I know that it's easier said than done, especially if you're an introvert, but try to get involved with a small online community, a discord server or a message group. Having any sort of regular interaction with others, even if it isn't face to face can help reduce feeling of loneliness. Though I hazard a guess that you might have tried that.

If you're into online gaming, perhaps find a social guild within the game. Not only will that help the loneliness, but online gaming is infinitely more enjoyable with other people.

The only other things that I can suggest is to bury yourself in a hobby that speaks to your core. Something that intrinsically makes you feel like you. An activity that not only occupies your time and thoughts, but will help revitalise your soul. It might not ease the loneliness, but it will distract your thoughts while help you feel at ease.
 

Punkedsolar

Never say never
For a different solution, if you have the time and money - consider a pet as well. This will help you get used to interacting with someone who is happy to see you, and your resulting happiness will make it easier to have the energy to find friends.

This may sound stupid, but I also grow a lot of plants, and my plants make me happy. I have all kinds of orchids, roses, bromeliads - I learned how to take cuttings and grow from seed and I have a huge garden that has cost me almost nothing. Just being out there amongst all the life is good for me.
 

Raever

Chaotic Neutral Wreckage
If you're into online gaming, perhaps find a social guild within the game. Not only will that help the loneliness, but online gaming is infinitely more enjoyable with other people.

This is a perfect suggestion!
Some of my longest friendships were made through Guild Wars 2 and other online MMO's where I could just spend hours playing with others and talking about who knows what. :3
 

Minerva_Minx

Explosion loving skooma cat
Just start talking here as a start;)
 

Kit H. Ruppell

Exterminieren! Exterminieren!
This year? No idea.
 

Minerva_Minx

Explosion loving skooma cat

Vesper The Coyusky

Well-Known Member
All of the above are great suggestions. For meLike what @KnightsSorrow said, find yourself a hobby you enjoy or wanting to do. Definitely helps alot. When I'm lonely. I try to find something that really interests me and is something I want to tackle, it gives me motivation to find out and think about how it would be done. For example, I felt lonely after the semester ended and having nothing to do other than work and not to mentions friends were very low for me or mostly busy. I discovered fursuits and wanted to make one on my own for a long time and even though my lonely thoughts are still there, it's not as serious as it was once I started doing the project, not to mention learning something like sewing has been beneficial for other projects. Also even saying hi on someones page on here helps alot. Most of us have time to respond to conversation and talk.
 

KnightsSorrow

Well-Known Member
This year? No idea.
Admittedly I was also going to mention joining a small social club, gaming group or short courses on things... and then I remembered that social distancing/isolation guidelines can greatly vary from country to country at the moment.

But seriously, when I was living in Canada years ago, I was seriously depressed and lonely. Joining a small weekly D&D group really helped me stay sane back then.
 

Kope

Artist?
Banned
Thanks for all the replies I'll try to do stuff online like talking to you peeps for example and maybe some social gaming.
 

TyraWadman

The Brutally Honest Man-Child
Turn people into money- wait. Don't do that.
But if we turned all the racist people into money, we'd never know debt!

To answer the question though, I just keep myself busy, whether it be daydreaming or working on my writings/art. Sometimes it's hard to stay motivated but I just accept it.
Finding someone to talk to isn't hard, but finding and making a friend is. At least for me, since I don't just automatically believe someone that reciprocates a friendly greeting is my friend.
Just try to remind yourself that this rut is only temporary. As long as you continue to try, and get back up whenever you fall down, you'll eventually get there.
 

Kope

Artist?
Banned
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