Majority of relationships don't last. You know why? Because it basically takes only one failed relationship per person to break even. Most people I know dated more than one person by the time they graduated high school. I'm in the minority having had only one past boyfriend before getting married. HOWEVER. That's all statistics. You know that saying "lies, damned lies, and statistics"? It's basically pointing out that statistics mean fuck-all for the individual case.
If you want a relationship, go for a relationship. If you don't want one, that's okay. When you are in a relationship, enjoy it. You are likely to get hurt, but you are likely to have some good times, too.
Statistics aren't without errors of sorts. Of course I'm not trying to blanket every woman on this planet. Most? Yes.. although the numbers start to get wonky once you get past the age of 30 and of course there will always be a minority that can control or "shut off" their internal instincts so as to not be attracted to jerky guys or whatever. I'm 27 and one thing I've always noticed after most of my relationships have ended is I'm either "too weird" or "I'm not a man". Literally those two. To me,
that's insulting. That just makes me want to hang myself because I'm not what people desire. I always gave my 110% in trying to make my mate happy, even playing along with stuff that I had little interest in as well as trying new things. I'm rarely ever told what went wrong other than those two vague responses that I just mentioned. I'm not a psychic so please, tell me how I can improve myself. That's how I feel about this.
They who? The people you tried dating in the past? Women? Martians?
Because I can guarantee you wanting an "alpha male" type personality is not something that universally applies to women. I can also more or less guarantee that if you go after women who do want an alpha male, you're going to keep getting disappointed.
My advice would be to stop thinking in terms of what a catch you are, or how whatever partner came after you is a "replacement". It's offputting to a lot of people to meet someone with an attitude of "I am so good my ex couldn't handle it", and it's insulting to everyone involved to imply the role of "boyfriend" is something so vital in a person's life that they have to go from one to the next as though they're patching a leaky roof.
My husband didn't replace my ex. I dated my ex during one period of my life. That ended. I eventually rekindled a spark I'd had with a friend and it turned into engagement and eventually marriage.
1. Yes. (lol Martians?)
2. See my previous quote.
3. Normally I'm reserved about this stuff on a public forum but I am full of mental problems. Aspergers, anxiety, and depression being the big three. I visit a therapist every 2 months for evaluation purposes.
The reason I bring this up is because in actuality, in the back of my mind I really do feel like a worthless individual and that I'm "never good enough" so I finally decided to say "fuck it" and do a complete 180'.
Whether I'm actually being myself or if this is all an act to cover up who I really am on the inside is anyone's guess. As I previously mentioned, I'm full of mental disorders. I am a fucked up mess and the
only thing keeping me from "offing" myself every other week is my medication. It's been a problem since I was 16.
4. I'm happy to hear that you were able to settle down with someone that later created a marriage. I personally don't support marriage simply because divorce rates are ridiculous and it's nothing but legal trouble to file divorce papers, etc. To me it's nothing more than a paper that entitles you to tax benefits.. and as I sign of trust, I guess.
Finally, I want to make it clear that I'm not trying to be rude or aggressive with any person in particular. I'm stating my opinions just as you are. I'm not saying that either of us are right or wrong here. Some people are just going to have wildly different views on this subject matter, such as myself.
