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Fidchell's Constructive Criticism Thread

Fidchell

Time destroys everything.
Or how I learned to stop worrying and love improvement. This was inspired from the other topic, of which I am now incredibly bittersweet about... I was hoping you guys could help me from here on out. I will be making attempts to focus on areas I have to improve on as well as more dynamic poses and such. Redlines would be greatly appreciated, but aren't required. I guess we should just jump right into it with three drawings I've created recently. I'll touch up on how I think I've done first, and then I'll take in what you guys have to say with as much open mindedness as I am able.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/erihu8g66c2pvl5/jai.png

There's nothing much I can say about this one honestly. It was just a simple standing pose in which I had the afterthought of lifting the right arm and giving him the gun. I'm somewhat satisfied with everything but said arm. The forearm perspective doesn't seem to play out very well with the creases on the clothing and of course I still need a lot of practice with the hand when wrapped around a grip. Drawing the gun first would've probably served me better.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/p65vpbxqhqslyli/kazmajump copy.png

This character, King Kazma, is centered around martial arts, so I wanted to do a more difficult, lively pose. I meant to make it look like he's careening through the air and preparing a devastating blow with his left fist. I'm not too happy with the upper body, mostly the positions of the arms as well as the head/neck. I could've also given a better impression of wind direction.

https://www.dropbox.com/s/bv0kovlg456m3fv/eyota.png

A simpler pose of a tribal character. She is the alpha of her tribe, so I tried to give her a pose that communicates both her position as well as her actual personality, which consists of a bit of spunkiness. Aside from the length of her right arm, I can't see much else wrong with this one, in my eyes at least.

I appreciate all criticisms on things that I haven't covered! Thanks for taking a look through.
 

Fidchell

Time destroys everything.

DrGravitas

Member
I have little to offer in the way of criticism, but I can say that you seem to have a good grasp of perspective in your figures. Your coloring has lots of nice little touches and details, as well. I didn't see much in the way of dynamic poses, beyond the second entry of the first post. For that entry, I didn't read 'martial arts move' so much as 'rappelling down a wall'. For this, I think your best bet would be to gather lots of reference photos of martial arts in action. These should help give you idea of the possibilities for the pose. Consider that you are drawing a single frame of a complete action that started with the character in one stance and will end with his fist connecting with his opponent's face. Try to imagine the physics and general necessities of this action. For example, the starting pose of the action informs where the fist can possibly be by setting limits on its trajectory (obviously they're not going to rotate their entire body 90 degrees one way, then pivot in mid-air and rotate their torso another 45 to connect.)

I think your on the right track as far as what parts to focus on in the picture. There's nothing really tying the actions of the arms into the rest of the pose. By setting up the arms so that could conceivably connect with something that the eyes and head are already focused on, you can create that tie-in.
 

Ataraxis

New Member
Hey Fidchell,

I took a crack at redlining/ redrawing bits of the tribal one. Here are the crits:

https://www.dropbox.com/s/pzbeepnplqjl8mm/FidchellTribalCrit.png

I focused a lot on the head, which has some subtle perspective issues that I'm also seeing in some of your other work. Specifically, the main structure of the face looks a little bit more straight-on to the viewer than the muzzle does. I drew a top-view of how it reads above, and I drew two possible corrections to the sides- the left keeps the muzzle and adjusts the head, the right keeps the head and adjusts the muzzle.

The pose looks very symmetrical and firm, which may have been intentional (communicates authority well), but you mentioned wanting "spunk," so I drew up a gesture to the right that might be a bit more emotive. The biggest thing to take from this are the angles of the hips and shoulders- note how they're both horizontal in your original, and tilted quite a bit in mine. It tends to be the case when people are standing that their hips will be tilted up on the side their weight is resting on, down on the other. The shoulders oppose this motion to create balance. (The term for this is contrapposto.) Playing this up will add femininity and and spunk, playing it down will read as more masculine and authoritative.

Generally speaking, your work looks pretty solid to me. Poking through your gallery, it seems like a lot of things you get wrong you have right somewhere else, which seems like a hint that you're on the right track. If you're looking to improve, I think your best bet might be turning to life studies, especially things like gesture drawing if you want to loosen up. I strongly recommend Pixelovely ( http://artists.pixelovely.com/practice-tools/figure-drawing/ ) [NSFW, though very tasteful] as an image resource database for gestures.

Best of luck with it!
 

Fidchell

Time destroys everything.
Thanks a bunch, Gravity and Ataraxis. I haven't had time lately to check up on this topic, but I really do appreciate the time you've put into the criticism. I also must thank you for the Pixelovely website, Ataraxis! It will definitely come in handy.

All I have for this session is a fanart sketch I drew. It's a bit of a strange pose that I did without referencing anything, so there's bound to be something wrong. Tear it up!

https://www.dropbox.com/s/9a3wxq0qh058fup/turner5.png
 
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