Friend troubles! >;<

[FoxxKelley]

Well, I met a nice little French Dragon back in..April. He was in distress, and was looking for friends. I helped him out, and we became very close over the summer. We were together nearly 24/7 laughing, talking, and playing games.


This past September he fell into a pit of deep depression, and he's gotten worse since. Not even an entire day since then where he's felt better. He feels very alone and distant from people, and he really wishes he had more friends. He even went as far two 'kill off' his own Fursona because no one likes him. He's had this Fursona..years before he had even heard about the Furry Fandom. His Skype picture now is just a black square. I know deep down that he still wants to be a Dragon...

I checked up on him yesterday, as normal to see how he was doing, and he was marvelous! He was so happy, and cuddly, and sweet. It felt like time had re winded back to summer. I thought that..maybe he had found a friend or something. ^^

It turns out that he had just gotten drunk, and it was the Alcohol speaking for him. As nice as it was to see him happy again, Alcohol to make people like you is most certainly not the answer.

I tried explaining to him "You are an awesome person to be around when you're at your highest point! People would love you, Drake! You need just ONE more friend who treats you like I do, and you will be just FINE. You just have to work with me!" But he refuses to cooperate at all with me. He won't even change his Skype picture back..

Grr, I love him and all, but it frustrates me. >;<


Would anyone care to meet him? Maybe hang out with us? Even a little advice on helping him would be greatly appreciated. Throw me a bone. Something. ;3;

 

[TeenageAngst]

The obvious answer is he needs to get tanked whenever he's feeling blue and not driving.

The not so obvious answer is his problems are beyond the help of a furry forum. Specifically there could be a number of things wrong. Since he's been depressed since September, maybe he's depressed about school. Maybe he's really freaking bi-polar. Maybe he's just French and his inevitable existential quandary decided to kick in. We really don't have much to go on. The fact he killed his fursona off though probably means he wants attention.

 

[Cyanide_tiger]

Send him to a therapist.

They get paid to do what you're asking us to do for free, and they're much better at it than we are.

 

[Tabasco]

Where exactly are his problems coming from? Poor social skills? Vastly different personal belief system than everyone around him? Anxiety or shyness? History of depression and isolation?

There's really nothing to go off of to give tangible ideas on how to help him pick himself up and start meeting people, and inviting people to hang out with him out of pity is nothing like having actual friends.

 

[Kluuvdar]

If he's been feeling lonely it could be a plea for attention. If you want him to feel better try getting him active and around people like yourself that genuinely want to be friends with him, not out of pity.

 

[Traven V]

Well he sounds like a decent person. Being depressed could be a clinical condition so I don't think it would be a bad idea to see a therapist. That's nice you are reaching out for him though.

 

[burakki]

Just keep trying to talk to him more. If he feels awful all the time, making him feel less lonely could make a huge difference. Try to get him to receive some type of help or convince him to talk to some type of professional/family/etc.

 

[Conker]

I've a feeling this is more than a problem of having friends. If he's going through some silly shenanigans over a make believe character, then he's either taking the fandom too seriously and should just stopit, he's attentionwhoring, or he's got some issues that none of us can help him with. If you want any semblance of help from here, we'll need more info, but it's just easy to tell him to go seek professional help.

He could just drink more, god knows it's a wonderful way to make ya happy for a short period of time.

 

[Anubite]

As I generally do, I recommend he get another hobby, therapy is always good or perhaps exercise and something to fill his time. I had a time much like that a year ago, felt like garbage and didn't get out much and when I did, I didn't enjoy it. I was very depressed and after an incident, I went to therapy for a short while to deal with my anxiety. Feeling good and wanting change I decided to go to out to a local hobby store and got into wargaming. I made friends, fit in well and got a better sense of who I was around these people.

I feel the best therapy is getting yourself to do something different, something you know will be fun but are too afraid to do because of anxiety. It gives some good confidence and helps.

Good luck to him though, depression sucks and it is hard to get out of. Best of luck to him.

 

[Dreaming]

That sounds like the longest, most painful game of Get Married...

If he's in France and you're in the US there's not much you can do, seriously trying to deal with someone else's depression online is just a no

 

[Neuron]

While other people are right that this sounds like a situation he needs a legitimate therapist for, you and your friend may add me on Skype and feel free to vent at any time.

Although most people on this forum are going to be more liable to laugh at the fact he feels so distraught his character is "dead" and call it attention whoring, I'm not like that. It actually worries me quite a bit, because it's a way of expressing that he feels dead creatively, which I find drives people to suicide more often.