Game: bad genies

[Kara Kusa]

Granted! All aquatic life has been annihilated. There is nothing left. Seafood trade haults, and the fish stick industry completely collapses.

I wish for a bouncy ball.

 

[Phoxphite]

Granted, but one bounce and the ball bounces straight to space.

I wish for world peace.

 

[Chad Firepaws]

Granted! The world is now a monarchy. Anyone who dissents is executed, but don't worry, we're all brainwashed so we love our Supreme Leader Chuckles McCookie and will gladly build endless cookie farms for him


I wish I didn't have to build cookie farms

 

[Foxridley]

Granted. You now work in a uranium mine.

I wish I could grow a perfect, no-maintenance beard.

 

[Chad Firepaws]

Granted, it's on your butt


I wish to know my purpose in life

 

[Foxridley]

You pass butter.

I wish I knew the winning lottery numbers.

 

[Faustus]

Erm. Granted... you now know last week's winning lottery numbers. (You know you could just go to their website, right?)

I wish for a lever of infinite length and a solid place to stand.

 

[Yakamaru]

Granted, but the lever takes an infinite amount of time to react to any movement. And it goes through your neighbor's house. :>

I wish for one giant octopus named Otto.

 

[Chad Firepaws]

Here's your subby Otto!



I wish for an octopus who can bake pizzas in the back at lightning speed

 

[Foxridley]

He can bake pizza, but it’s soggy and tastes mostly like ink.

I wish for Spiderman to deliver my pizza.

 

[Phoxphite]

Granted, but it's Spider-Man 3 symbiote controlled Spider-Man delivering the pizza. Plus it was 31 minutes late and his place of employment doesn't have a policy to cover for it.

I wish for mandatory pizza time.

 

[Kara Kusa]

Granted. The space-time continuum distorts into new and novel structures throughout the universe as space is replaced with pizza, creating a pizza-time continuum instead.

I wish for a really big bass drum.

 

[Yakamaru]

Granted, but it's too big to carry, well, anywhere. And it smells.

I wish for a good playlist on Spotify.

 

[Phoxphite]

Granted, but it's made entirely of bands by the name "Good".

I wish for seven dollars.

 

[Frank Gulotta]

Granted, here's a seven dollar bill! totally legit. Has the signature of President Harambe

A wish for some more life energy.

 

[Yakamaru]

Granted, but everyone else around you are drained.

I wish for a can of Monster that automatically refills when you're done drinking it.

 

[Foxridley]

Of course it will flood the world if you spill it.

I wish for it to be 70 degrees.

 

[Borophagus Metropolis]

It will be 70 degrees, but the dew point will also be 70 degrees, and the wind speed will be 70 knots.

I wish I had a knot.

 

[ben909]

gives you knotted fishing line to untangle


i wish PLOTTING was easier

 

[Chad Firepaws]

Granted. Now you say it out loud each time, to help you remember better!



I wish I could never make a typo

 

[Frank Gulotta]

Granted! now every time you make a typo, you stub your toe. Soon you'll never make a typo ever again.

I wish life was less complicated.

 

[GroovySpaceFox]

Granted, but your life becomes so uneventful that you will get really board.

I wish I could move stuff with my mind.

 

[Phoxphite]

Granted. However, you move whatever you think of, whenever you think of it, even if it's not what you actually wanted moved, or if you wanted anything moved.

I wish for the bad genie to make a wish

 

[Chad Firepaws]

Wow! Um, I wish for a Nirvana T-shirt. Oh boy!



I wish more people would come to our restaurant, fuel prices are hurting deliveries

 

[Foxridley]

There is a line 6.9 miles long waiting to get in.

I wish to get past the line. It's blocking traffic.