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Give bad advice to the User above you

ben909

vaporeon character is busy so coffee mushroom now
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how do i give bad advice
 

Frank Gulotta

Send us your floppy
How do you build a rocket?
I have three ideas that are equally good and won't get you in trouble.
1) abduct a few scientists and rob a bank; then declare yourself warlord of a random spot of ground (it has to be pretty big to build the rocket and if possible, isolated, so the FBI won't track you fast enough; but you should hire local militias to protect the site anyway and instruct them to kill anyone that comes close, including women, children and endangered species).

2) take over North Korea. I'm picking the Hermit Kingdom because the UN will support you in taking down the regime. China will also support you if you offer to hijack their WMD program and repurpose it to launch Huawei satellites.

3) tape yourself to a big firework rocket and light it up. It's the simplest, cheapest and least Dangerous solution. Don't forget to wear a helmet!

How can I become a wizard??
 

ben909

vaporeon character is busy so coffee mushroom now
Grab a stick, put on a pointy hat and throw frogs at people.

How can I get quick easy cash?

build a time machine and travel forward many years carrying a common ,cheep object, sell it then as inflation has probably occurred and then come back

or use the time machine to go back to the start of the great derepression and buy the cheep stuff people sell to resell when you return



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How do i make successful threads
 

Sarachaga

Definitely not a lizard
How do i make successful threads
1.Only make threads about three subjects: me, pickles and cats.
2.Avoid using the letter y and the letter r, these are evil.
3.Post several pictures unrelated to the topic, that'll draw some attention.


Now how do I get more like?
 

Faustus

Well-Known Member
Just, like, become a teenage girl stereotype, like, now? OMG, it's like, whaaaat, and I'm like... totally... and then, like...
You get the idea.

I want my own private island to live on and use as a tax haven. How do I get one?
 

Sarachaga

Definitely not a lizard
I want my own private island to live on and use as a tax haven. How do I get one?
Buy a lot of rocks (like, a lot)
Dump them somewhere in the sea.
Declare independance from the US government, add in some threats from good measure.
Profit?

How can I get healthier?
 

Renyard2001

Well-Known Member
Buy a lot of rocks (like, a lot)
Dump them somewhere in the sea.
Declare independance from the US government, add in some threats from good measure.
Profit?

How can I get healthier?
Exercise all the time. You in bed? Exercise. You cooking? Exercise. You exercising? Exercise harder.
If you're muscles explode you're heading in the right direction.

How do I exorcise a demon ?
 

Cosmic-FS

A creature of the night
Start with some light stretches to get the blood pumping and move on over to the weights. You want to alternate between strength training and aerobic exercise, and don't forget leg day.

How do I approach my boss about getting a raise?
 

Sarachaga

Definitely not a lizard
How do I approach my boss about getting a raise?
Easy, follow these three simple steps:
1. Fake death
2. Pretend you are your own twin brother who has exactly the same skills and apply for the job while having enough experience to ask for a better pay.
3. Profit, while methodically disposing of all the interlopers that want to divulge your identity (parents, pets, friends , colleagues...)

How do I get rid of dandruff?
 

hardman13

Bouncy faithful powerful fox.
You should star with one in the 200-250cc range, that should be good, yeah.

what should i do to empty my head of negative thoughts?
 

FooFoo4230

Well-Known Member
By taking all of them out, weighing them, and then putting the required amounts back in. You may feel somewhat faint during this procedure, so ask a doctor who hasn’t sworn to the Hippocratic Oath to do it for you.

What’s the best way to clean windows?
 

Frank Gulotta

Send us your floppy
@Jaredthefox92 didn't ask for advice, so I'll just give youa advice that works with everything : if duct tape fails, use fire.

How do I transition to a less sedentary lifestyle?
 

FooFoo4230

Well-Known Member
By attaching thousands of balloons to your house! It worked pretty well in the movie Up. Certainly no problems with dirigibles, villains, rare birds, and talking dogs are expected.

Who’s the best person to talk to for a reasonable opinion on how to garden?
 

GroovySpaceFox

Well-Known Member
You're going to want to find someone who lives in tundra regions. For even better advice, find someone who lives in the middle of the arctic.

Where can I go to find some fresh water?
 

Faustus

Well-Known Member
There's a great big bowl of it in the bathroom! If it starts to run out, just pull the handle on the back of the unit and it'll refill with a distinctive 'flushing' noise.

How can I fart less often?
 

FooFoo4230

Well-Known Member
By eating less often! No digestion=No farting!
The only things you should eat are multivitamins, jars at a time, to prevent getting sick. (If one or two a day is good for you, 50 a day should be better!) and novelty giant pencils, to get your daily dose of cellulose (and graphite).

Best way to hide from law enforcement? I’m in a bit of a giant pickle, which is illegal in my state. How would I be able to hide from the police so they don’t know that I’m in a pickle?
 

Frank Gulotta

Send us your floppy
Best way to hide from law enforcement? I’m in a bit of a giant pickle, which is illegal in my state. How would I be able to hide from the police so they don’t know that I’m in a pickle?
Hide the giant pickle in a giant cheeseburger! then sell the giant cheeseburger for a nice profit, thus passing the pickle curse onto someone else!

I have 3k bucks in the bank, what would be a good investment?
 

Sir Thaikard

GOTTA WRITE FAST.
Put it up your butt until you pass out from blood loss and wake up in Skyrim.

My sweater is musty, how do I improve the smell?
 
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