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Greatest cartoon quotes of all time.

Judge Spear

Well-Known Member
I am the cheese. I am the best character on the show! I am better than both the salami AND the bologna COMBINED.
-The Cheese

I can't stop thinking Eddy. How can my feet smell if they don't have a nose?

Who you callin Pinhead? (it was the face really)


She do a blep
Wakko (playing with a bust of Dr. Scratchansniff): "Ooh, a giant Pez dispenser! Want one?"
Yakko: "Please!"
Dr. Scratchansniff: "Stop playing with my bust!"
*Awkward silence*
Yakko (to audience): "Good night, everybody!"

Let's just change this from "Greatest Cartoon Quotes of All Time" to "Greatest Animaniacs Quotes of All Time". That show spawned so many of them. Like this:

Beethoven: I am Ludwig Van Beethoven! Vorld famous composer, und pianist!
Yakko: You're a WHAT?!
Beethoven: A PIANIST!
Yakko: (smooch) Goodnight everybody!
Beethoven (confused): But zat is vat I am! A pianist!
Yakko: I think we've heard enough out of you! (proceeds to wash out his mouth with soap)


--Kaneda, AKIRA

"You don't pay us. We don't even exist; we're just a clever visual metaphor to humorously personify the abstract concept of thought."
--Spongebob, Spongebob Squarepants

"They also claim that the Om's ancestors on the ancient planet Terra were quite intelligent. Of course, seeing how they destroyed their entire civilization, I doubt that's correct."
--Master Kaa, Fantastic Planet

"How much thalidomide did your mom take?!"
--The Monarch, Venture Bros.

"End of first sequence and fade to black!"
--Ed, Ed, Edd n' Eddy

  • "Don't be so mellow-dramatic you and your illusions of of grandeur,I'm not getting in that filthy, grimy garbage can with you!"
  • "Okay, go fuck yourself."

--Fritz The Cat


Aaaaaaand more.

- "Mooooom! I'm god of the sea people!"
- "That's nice, poopie!"
--South Park

"Wow, I knew that book was good, but I never knew it could drive a pony to petty theft!"
--Twilight Sparkle, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

"You're talking absolute shit again, Karl..."
--Ricky Gervais, The Ricky Gervais Show


Sandy: Oh, it's easy if you approach it scientifically, SpongeBob. Now, what is laughter?
Spongebob: The thing that used to give my life meaning and purpose but now mocks me with its cruel indifference.

(From "Spongebob Squarepants", a' course.)


Posing school graduate
"It don't matter, none of this matters." Carl, from ATHF

Arshes Nei

Masticates in Public
"A waste is a terrible thing to mind" Janine from The Real Ghostbusters.


Prosecutor: "Are you Captain Lincoln F. Sternn?"
Stern: "I am."
Prosecutor: "Lincoln Sternn, you stand here accused of 12 counts of murder in the first degree, 14 counts of armed theft of Federation property, 22 counts of piracy in high space, 18 counts of fraud, 37 counts of rape...
[pauses to check rap sheet]"
Prosecutor: "... and one moving violation. How do you plead?"
Stern: "Not guilty."

Heavy Metal

Butters Shikkon

Patron Saint of Queers
"A waste is a terrible thing to mind" Janine from The Real Ghostbusters.

I didn't know that's where you got that phrase from. Interesting.

Here's a few more I like:

"I am not an entity; I am a time. My time is now. The Word is Chron." Daemon,"Reboot"

"I will never abandon my dream...Alright! I will continue to live alone. Forever by myself! I will live young and I will live beautiful!" Queen Nehelenia, Sailor Moon SuperS.

"You know, Bart, some cultures don't believe you are born with a soul. You have to earn it, through thought and suffering...like you just did." Lisa, The Simpsons. (The not shitty years.)


Characterless sack of potatoes
The first 3 seasons of Spongebob are ridiculously quotable. Especially the stuff Patrick says:

"East? I thought you said Weast"

"It should be set to 'W' for wumbo"

"Is mayonnaise an instrument?"

Possibly not the greatest quotes of all time, but I reference spongebob quotes way more often than I should.

EDIT: The Simpsons too, is very quotable:

"In this house we obey the laws of thermodynamics!" - Homer

"Water, water everywhere so let's all have a drink" - Homer

"It sounded like a silo tipping over" - Lisa
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More quotes:

"They are bandits - they are evil! They live on the other side of the park."
--Om, Fantastic Planet

"This is a crib. It is only to be used for napping, sleeping and on occasion, with permission, to be used as a pretend old-timey western fort."
--Pinkie Pie, My Little Pony: Friendship is Magic

"I'm going to dial 911 right on his FACE!!"
--Buck Tudrussel, Time Squad

"I'm goin' to tan yer head into a FLOORSIFTER!!!"
--The Scotsman, Samurai Jack


"I've been up and down the four corners of this big old world. I've seen it all and I've done it all. I've fought many a good man, and I've laid many a good woman." Fritz, from Fritz the Cat.


Living a Boy's Adventure Tale
Sandy: Oh, it's easy if you approach it scientifically, SpongeBob. Now, what is laughter?
Spongebob: The thing that used to give my life meaning and purpose but now mocks me with its cruel indifference.

(From "Spongebob Squarepants", a' course.)

Good Lord that's a good one!

Anyways, I found this gem and just had to post it:




New Member
"Girls are like a piping hot slice of pie with a scoop of confusing on top."
- Hugh Neutron from Jimmy Neutron


Barely Alive
"I'll tell you what the news of the world is! WE'RE IN A LOT OF GODDAMN TROUBLE!!!"
-Stewie Griffin


" Dude, Sucking at something is the first step of being sorta good at something!" Jake From Adventure Time.

"I love food more than I love people." Jake From Adventure Time.

" I see now that the circumstances of one's birth are irrelevant; it is what you do with the gift of life that determines who you are." Mewtwo from The first Movie.

I'll probably post more later :3


The Real Wheels of Steel
Puffy:" Gee, sure was mean.. of the bad giant to chain Pierre to this.. atomic bomb!
(Wuz-Wuz pops a giant gum bubble)
Pierre: "PLEASE Wuz-Wuz, would you QUIT it with the popping?!"
Professor: "If I could just determine the sequence of wires to cut I could defuse this device. Hmm..." (holds up red wire) "This one..." (holds up blue wire)"...Or this one".
Kozy: (reading "Bomb Defusing for Bears") "It says right here to defuse this kind of atomic bomb, first you cut the red wire, then you cut the blue wire".
Pierre: "You must be absolutely positive, mon ami, my life, she depends on eet".
Kozy: "Well cheese and rice Pierre, 'course I'm positive, that's what it says right here, red wire then blue wire".
Pierre: I am sorry my friend. The pressure, eet is too much. Please proceed Professor, cut the red wire".
Puffy: "Way to go Kozy, you did a great job reading that bomb manual"
Wuz-Wuz: "Hee hee yeah, especially for someone who's dyslexic"
Kozy: "That's liz-dexic Wuz-Wuz..."
(Puffy and Wuz-Wuz look at each other in horror)
Puffy and Wuz-Wuz "CUT THE BLUE WIRE!! CUT THE BLUE WIRE!!" (everyone disintegrates)

--Eek the Cat, "Cape Fur"
(The punchline of the above was edited out in the Jetix rebroadcast)

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Posing school graduate
"Oh if only my hand was my penis" - Kintaro, Golden Boy


"DEEE DEEEEE!!!! GETT OUT OF MY LABORRRATORYY!!!" - Dexter's Laboratory. Classic cartoon.