Have you ever confronted this peculiar problem or am I the only one?

[SimplyUnknown]

Alright so ill keep this brief for light reading, pure and simple---I cant find my sona.
And I'm not talking like, a just starting out furry sort of problem either---ive been struggling hard for going on 6 years now to find THAT one.
Ive tried all the animals I like the most--all my aesthetics too, ive even tried Mech and undead characters, I even have tried various shapeshifters---none and I mean NONE of them have stuck, ill come up with one that is nice and I like, but then in an instant or even up to a few days later---something feels just VERY wrong and off sending alarms off in my head....
No matter what I try, I just cant find a FACE for my furry self.

Have any of the rest of you ever struggled with this? Did you ever find the right face? How did you cope?

My boyfriend has been a cat forever and he just KNEW and basnt changed his kitty since its creation when he was small--I'm admittedly really late to the fursona race so to speak---but that cant be the ONLY problem right?

I'm just....its been really upsetting honestly, no amount of tutorials or advice from friends seems to help, so I'm really reaching out to the community here to see if anyone else has ever had/has the same problem as me?

Id appreciate anything at this point, advice, stories on how you coped with any species dysphoria type problems ECT---heck if you could even help explain my problem id be so greatful.

 

[Taterbunny]

Don't worry, it's not just you. I also struggled for years to make a sona that stuck, probably around 6 or 7 years.
I went through hundreds of designs, animals. Tried to base them on my physical features, then just physical attributes I liked. Anytime I thought I had one, I started feeling really detached days later (they were lucky to last days). It was frustrating for me as well, I thought I'd never have one that stuck. Other people seemed to "find" their sona so easily. Maybe we're too picky, haha. I eventually had it narrowed to a bunny and lizard, and a fusion of both as far as the species. I tried tooooons of combinations and separations, nothing worked. I just coped with other non-sona characters of mine.
Though one day, it just popped in my mind, that magical "it" moment. A pathetic little blob that was a personification of my problems and insecurities. Rather than trying to make one that looked like me, I made one that looked like a manifestation of how I felt. It might not sound great to have a fursona based on negative emotions, but for whatever reason, she just stuck. Seemed to fit more.

So I guess maybe play around with designs stemming from emotional feeling rather than physical. You can still mix and match attributes until you find something that sticks. Tater's a fat, sad, pathetic little lump, but still has the mixed parts I like (bunny ears, gecko tail paw pads, big claws, etc). It sucks and it's always a hard thing trying to help someone make a sona. It has to be something they themselves feel. And when you find it, you'll know.

 

[ellaerna]

Like your boyfriend, I've been a cat for just about as long as I've been in the fandom, so I can't say I've ever had trouble with species. However, cat species and design has been an ever changing concept for me. I'm indecisive and aesthetically all over the place, so I've never really had a one true design for my fursona. And that's okay. These are fictional beings we run around as on the internet. There's no rule saying you have to have a hard and definitive design.

I think it's important for you not to overthink this too much, or let it cause you too much stress. Fursona's and furry characters are supposed to be fun and letting it get you down is definitely not fun. The more pressure you put on yourself to find THAT one, the harder it's going to be. And don't feel like you need to come up with something. Some people have multiple fursonas and some people have none. Just take a breather and think about what is important to you in a sona, if there's anything at all.

 

[Solapi]

It takes time to feel connected to a character sometimes. If you're too impatient, and don't cultivate your bound with your character it will always feel off. The more you'll draw him, imagine him in different situations, stories, relationship, the stronger your bound will become. I do have character I connecter immediately (like Delilah, on my profile picture) and some others who took more time (like my fursona Solapï!). My main character was a white lady cat, Luna, for YEARS but I wanted to create a fursona. So I created Solapï, a lioness. I played a lot with her design, tried different things etc. My feelings for her became stronger with times. It's something you have to work on, it won't suddenly happen.
By the way, it's just for fun. Maybe you overthink and what it to be perfect and regroup all the characteristics in one char. Instead, create multiple characters ! I find easier to have a neutral Fursona that looks more like me, and to have multiple colorful characters .

Good luck !