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Did you read all of it?

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Le Chat Nécro

most thugged-out dope hoe
hell in a handbasket, this got long. so long that i'm going to have to break this up into multiple posts. O.O but it's good to get it all down on paper. err, text box. if you have the time, please read through and let me know what you think. i tried to incorporate advice from my first thread so hopefully it shows. i even used proper capitalization and punctuation to make it easier to read. ^.^ and please feel free to ask questions!!!! i love it when people ask me questions cause then i have to think of answers and it just makes everything that much more fleshed out and if i can't think of an answer then i know i need to change something.

many thanks.


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Basic Info:
Name: Edelweiss Schwarz
Age: Late Twenties
Birthday: Nov 5
Species: Feline
Gender: Cis-Female
Sexuality: Undefined
Profession: Necromancer and Med Student


Looks:
General: Edelweiss is, in a word, unimpressive. Her diminutive stature and slight build do little to strike any emotion in those that meet her other than perhaps pity at how seemingly frail she is. Though she will insist that she is taller, she stands at a scant 63" and has a very thin frame that only accentuates her smallness. Her fur is short and soft, its blinding whiteness the only thing that might make this girl stand out in a crowd. A mess of white hair sits atop her head, with shaggy bangs that skim her piercing yellow eyes which are framed in black; half from sleep deprivation and half from the kohl liner she smudges on every morning. The one thing that she wears all day, every day without fail is a small pendant of awakening given to her by an old friend.

Everyday: It is very clear from her attire that Edelweiss grew up sometime in the 90's as she never quite got out of her grunge phase. This is not the stylized grunge of today- which she will rant endlessly about if given the chance-but actual grunge that favors cheap but sturdy pieces that are meant to last. Warm flannels, plain jeans or cutoffs, work boots, and simple t-shirts are her everyday go to. The definition of low-maintenance, she will either do absolutely nothing with her hair, or take the two seconds to tie it up into a messy poof of a ponytail. Or cut it into a ragged pixie cut during the hot summers when she simply cannot be bothered with it. Only slightly more time is spent on her makeup, culminating in a bit of "smoky" liner around the eyes and maybe some nail polish if she’s feeling fancy.

Student: As a med student, when she can’t wear her everyday clothes, Edelweiss spends most of her time in scrubs. While some might find fun or cute patterned ones, Edelweiss opts for plain pairs in muted colors. If her hair is long enough, she will always tie it back, as it is not ideal to have hair in your face while examining a patient, though her bangs make it a bit of a moot point. She'll also go in with a lighter hand on her eyeliner, but only just so as to not make any patients feel too uncomfortable with her.

Necromancer: One does not need to dress up to perform necromancy, and Edelweiss does often practice her craft in any outfit that she happens to be in at the time, but that does not mean that one cannot have fun dressing for the occasion. When she decides to make a show of it, Edelweiss paints the entire top half of her face black, the pigment smeared on by hand over her fur. Paired with a black hood that covers most of her head, the effect is striking; only her eyes and mouth peeking out through the darkness. She wears the traditional robes of her family- pitch black with iridescent blue-green stitching, intricate embroidery that weaves together the runes of their work with the sigils of their line.


Background:
To understand Edelweiss’s unique experiences, we must first go back to a time before the Schwarz’s were Schwarz’s. The patriarch of the family and the one who started it all, Aleifr, began to delve deep into the necromantic arts. How and why he did this, exactly, have been lost to time, but what the family does remember is the curse that all this brought upon them. For his crimes of tampering with the afterlife, Aleifr and all his descendants were fated to never find their final rest, but become living undead themselves upon their demise.

To this Aleifr basically said, “That seems fair,” and continued his work, passing down his knowledge to his offspring and their offspring after that. And sure enough, when he died, during the next new moon he rose again, as did his children and theirs. While there have been some family who have tried to find a way around this curse, the prevailing attitude was one of acceptance. In fact, many made pacts and promises with their relatives to look after each other after death and use each other in ways befitting each. Some, like Edelweiss’s grandfather, even used his unique fate to basically prank the local university after donating his body to them for science. And so the legacy lived on.

The family was never strictly open about their knowledges- preferring not to be tried as witches and heretics- but as time passed and the world became ever smaller, they became even more secretive until they eventually took to full seclusion. Most found homes far away from cities and opted to keep their children out of the public sphere so as to teach them far away from prying eyes. Their craft became less about raising countless minions or creating armies and whatnot, but more about tradition and the culture of knowledge that their heritage bestowed. It was in this kind of environment that Edelweiss was born and raised.

Like her cousins, she was homeschooled until she was 18, with a curriculum consisting of both modern knowledge and ancient teachings. She became well versed in both, and particularly keen on biology. Their house was large and imposing, sitting in the countryside far away from town, which resulted in young Edelweiss having precisely one friend, a neighbor boy named Emir. Their relationship wasn’t exactly smiled upon, but her parents tolerated it for the sake of their daughter and eventually came to approve of him as a friend and, with time, a suitor.

It was with Emir’s help that Edelweiss was able to persuade her parents to let her go to University with him where she intended to study biology. During their first year there, Emir became ill and eventually passed away; an event that would forever change Edelweiss’s path in life. On the next new moon she raised him from the dead and first thing next semester she changed her major to pre-med. Such a profession was unheard of in her family, but she did not care. Her intimate knowledge of life and death propelled her to the top of her class and after graduation she submitted her applications to the best med schools in the nation.

And this is where the story truly begins.
 
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Le Chat Nécro

most thugged-out dope hoe
Relationships:
Emir Falk- first the boy next door, then childhood friend, then high school sweetheart, and now undead manservant; Emir has been in Edelweiss’s life for a long time. Being homeschooled for most of her early education, she never had much contact with kids her own age outside of the young bison who lived up the road. Most people stayed away from their house out of an innate sense of unease, but not Emir. He waltzed right up to their yard at the ripe age of 7 and introduced himself. Edelweiss was hesitant at first but was desperate for a friend, and when Emir declared her to be his best friend after five minutes of talking to her, she eagerly accepted.

They were nigh inseparable since. Edelweiss always counted on him to be a bridge to the outside world and he readily showed her all he knew, including this cool new sound out of Seattle. And in return, she shared her world with him. Even after she told him about her families “proclivities” Emir never wavered in his friendship. Instead he embraced it and eventually made Edelweiss swear that if he happened to die before her that she would raise him from the dead so she wouldn’t be alone.

Unfortunately, that day came sooner than either expected. When they were both in college- and quite the item by that point- Emir died from illness. It hit pretty hard, sending Edelweiss into a deep depression. But as soon as the first new moon came around, she went to the cemetery to fulfil her promise. And once again the two were inseparable. Now the bison acts as her servant, looking after her home and helping her with her work. She often talks to him, however no one else has ever heard him speak and it’s debatable whether only she can hear him or if she has just gone crazy with loss.

Claire Monroy- possibly the most stressed person ever, but also the most caring, Claire is Edelweiss’s one [living] friend. Narratively, Claire acts as the audience stand-in, experiencing the wild and crazy life of our leading lady as the reader does and reacting in turn to each new hardship and insanity that comes with being a necromancer in med school.

A fellow med-student, Claire and Edelweiss met during orientation. Not put off by her general disheveled appearance, and feeling a bit sad for the poor girl sitting alone in the corner, Claire struck up a conversation during one of the various parties both were attending. Edelweiss, previously feeling very out of place and quite a bit drunk by that point, welcomed the company of the rabbit and was perhaps a bit too honest as they began talking about their various lives and interests. Most of which Claire brushed off as drunken foolery until she ended up walking Edelweiss home only to discover that she lived in the local murder house and was greeted by the animated corpse of a large bison when she opened the door. Despite having drunk considerably less, it was Claire who ended up passing out that night.

After a night of careful observation and a morning full of long explanations and expertly made pancakes, a new friendship was formed. Edelweiss is still a bit distant towards Claire at times, understandably so after what happened with Emir, but their relationship is solid. As for herself, Claire can have a hard time swallowing the truth of what Edelweiss is and does, but she is determined not to let it sway her. She spends a lot of time covering up for Edelweiss when she’s being extra weird, helping her study for exams, and reminding her that raising the cadaver from the dead to ask it how it died is technically cheating. Edelweiss in turn shares her knowledge, stands up for Claire against any assholes- med school is full of them- and provides wonderful breakfast foods courtesy of Emir.

Eliza Schwarz- Edelweiss’s mother and current matriarch of the family. Her title requires a certain prestige and propriety from her, but underneath the stern demeanor is a loving mother and wife. While their relationship is a bit strained- after years of dealing with the dead, it can be hard for Eliza to interact properly with the living- Edelweiss loves her mother and looks to her for guidance and support. They disagree on many things, like Edelweiss’s choice of career, but at the end of the day it is her daughter’s happiness that matters most.

Lucas Schwarz- Not originally a Schwarz, Edelweiss’s father took on the name after marrying his wife in order to keep the legacy alive. A descendant of the Putnam witches, he was a favored candidate for Eliza’s hand by her father, Edelweiss’s grandfather. He is a stubborn man, who has passed on that trait to his daughter along with his rather odd sense of humor. Being an outsider and having a rather strong work ethic, he approves of his daughter’s life plans more than her mother does. He is definitely Edelweiss’s favorite parent, though she can feel just as stifled by his old school way of thinking as by her mother’s fretting over appearances.
 
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Le Chat Nécro

most thugged-out dope hoe
seems that writing a metric fuck ton is not the way to get people to respond to you. surely if i write more things will get better!

Personality
Knowing exactly what is going to happen to you after you die is very freeing in a way. Indeed, most of the Schwarz family took it as an opportunity to really explore who they were as people without any religious or existential minutia holding them back. Edelweiss is no different, though more often than not this manifests as a teenage rebellion style disregard for authority, despite the fact that she has not been a teenager for many years. When you know we're all just dust and corpses in the end, you become disinclined to really care that much. Pair that with her sizable ego and an inherited sense of elitism, and she can be quite the handful. She knows more than you do, knows she knows more than you do, and knows that if you cross her she can kill you and then raise you from the dead to serve her for eternity. As you can imagine, she's a hoot at parties.

That's not to say that she doesn't have any insecurities lurking in the background of her mind. She gets quite flustered about her size, particularly how small and unassuming she looks. Most of her grungy look, aside from practicality, is meant to evoke a sense of danger and toughness. In reality, she is neither dangerous nor tough. If you call her on that or best her physically in any way, she will get very embarrassed and also very angry; usually falling back on old threats of curses to save face. Those threats are usually empty and she almost never lashes out physically, but when she does it's kind of hilarious how ineffectual her attempts at violence are. Her bark is much worse than her bite, so to speak.

She can also get anxious about interacting with others. Illusions of grandeur aside, she knows that she is not good at peopling. Just like her mother before her, being raised as the heir to a secret society family away from the public eye hasn't done much for her social skills. Most people are already innately put off by the vibe around her- death is a hard thing to wash off no matter how far away you get from it- but it is worsened once they hear her speak. She is blunt, almost painfully so, with little feeling or empathy behind her words. It is all cold and matter of fact and she says everything in such a deadpan way that it is hard to tell when she is being serious or joking. It's not unsurprising that she's only had a few true friends in her life, and that can leave her feeling very alone and anxious around large groups of people who aren't family.

Despite outward appearances, she is not quite the cold and heartless bitch she comes off as. When she loves, she loves deeply. When she hurts, it's to her core. While she might have a hard time expressing them, she still has feelings. Losing her best friend was perhaps the hardest thing she has ever had to experience and it sent her into a deep depression that she is still working through, even with him back by her side. There are things she can't let go, emotions she tries to bury but can't. It takes her a long time to open up about her feelings to anyone, but when she does it's clear that those waters run deep and vast. There are a few people in her life that she deeply cares for- Emir, Claire, her mother and father- and those few are the ones that get to truly know her.

From her father she inherited an iron will and steadfast stubbornness which is one of the few reasons she was able to get as far as she has despite her literal and metaphorical short comings. Once she has a plan, she goes for it tooth and nail, never to be dissuaded unless she herself comes to that conclusion. It was never a question for her of if she would be able to make it into med school and become a doctor. Only when. It is this steely determination that pushes her through all the all-nighters and grueling tests and awkward social interactions on her way to the top. Not even the innate hypocrisy of her plan, being a necromancer studying the healing arts, caused her much pause after she had decided that that is what she wanted to do.



 

lacelamb11

Member
I found the profile to be logically sound, in the sense that her motivations match up with her backstory and both affect and are affected by her personality. I like to think Edelweiss could be that comically deadpan character in a humorous rp, surrounded by a goofy cast and resigned to the role of the straight man. I'm no expert on writing, but here's some stuff I thought about while reading:
*Her interest in grunge fashion struck me at first as something purely utilitarian, but I found it curious that she is passionate enough about the style to rant about grunge-posers. Did she take part in the grunge subculture at one point? Listen to grunge music? Is that possibly a hobby of hers, even a way to relate to the outside world? You could go all out on that vein if you wanted to.
*Even if Edelweiss accepted Emir's friendship immediately, Edelweiss could've had a rocky relationship with him, at least at first given her background as a necromancer from a secluded family. I want to know more about Emir's personality, is he a flexible person? Does he have a curiosity for the macabre, or did he think their house was bad ass in its dark aura? Is he awkward in that he doesn't sense danger, or a very open minded person, or even very lonely and longing for a friend given that he lives out in the country side? I didn't take away much from reading about their friendship besides the fact that it was Edelweiss's only friendship until Emir's death, and thus important to her. Their dynamic has the potential to be very heartwarming though.
*What stopped Claire from never talking to Edelweiss again after the night she spent over? Or gossiping about her, or any number of possible negative reactions. I know she's an audience surrogate, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to know the appeal Claire sees in Edelweiss. Perhaps they have some common interest that helps them to bond, or Edelweiss's lifestyle is just so fantastical that she wants to learn more about her? I think it'd be really cool if they had a deal going on where Edelweiss agrees to show her more magic in exchange for Claire helping with her schoolwork and helping with her everyday-med-student life, and over time Claire begins to empathize more and more with Edelweiss and Edelweiss opens up to Claire and begins her healing process with her?

I wish you luck on revising and writing Edelweiss, and I hope my comments help you somehow ; w ;
 

Le Chat Nécro

most thugged-out dope hoe
*Her interest in grunge fashion struck me at first as something purely utilitarian, but I found it curious that she is passionate enough about the style to rant about grunge-posers. Did she take part in the grunge subculture at one point? Listen to grunge music? Is that possibly a hobby of hers, even a way to relate to the outside world? You could go all out on that vein if you wanted to.
it's a bit of both. utility is definitely a part of it. gonna need some good sturdy clothes if you're going to be tromping around graveyards all the time. but it's also something that she and emir shared. i tried to allude to that a bit in his portion of the relationships section: "he readily showed her all he knew, including this cool new sound out of Seattle". grunge was born in Seattle (and yes, i had it typoed there as San Fran to start, that was my bad, it's fixed now). it was something emir showed her and she took to it like a duck to water.

Even if Edelweiss accepted Emir's friendship immediately, Edelweiss could've had a rocky relationship with him, at least at first given her background as a necromancer from a secluded family. I want to know more about Emir's personality, is he a flexible person? Does he have a curiosity for the macabre, or did he think their house was bad ass in its dark aura? Is he awkward in that he doesn't sense danger, or a very open minded person, or even very lonely and longing for a friend given that he lives out in the country side? I didn't take away much from reading about their friendship besides the fact that it was Edelweiss's only friendship until Emir's death, and thus important to her. Their dynamic has the potential to be very heartwarming though.
i didn't want to go too far into his character since this is supposed to be about edelweiss and not the side characters, but yeah. his pre-death personality could use some building. i imagine him as being a bit dark- we all go through that angsty teen phase- and very curious. while he would call himself brave, he's actually probably closer to stupid, not truly grasping how dangerous things could be and being rather cavalier about various issues including his own death. it was curiosity (and possibly a dare) that brought him to edelweiss's house in the first place, and an ultimately pure heart that made him friend her. he's a good guy, very devil-may-care, and incredibly flexible in contrast to edelweiss's firmly structured family and home life. it's what made him so alluring to her aside from being the only kid who bothered to talk to her. he also probably fed into her rebellious nature and distaste for authority.

What stopped Claire from never talking to Edelweiss again after the night she spent over? Or gossiping about her, or any number of possible negative reactions. I know she's an audience surrogate, but it doesn't stop me from wanting to know the appeal Claire sees in Edelweiss. Perhaps they have some common interest that helps them to bond, or Edelweiss's lifestyle is just so fantastical that she wants to learn more about her? I think it'd be really cool if they had a deal going on where Edelweiss agrees to show her more magic in exchange for Claire helping with her schoolwork and helping with her everyday-med-student life, and over time Claire begins to empathize more and more with Edelweiss and Edelweiss opens up to Claire and begins her healing process with her?
so i can definitely see some potential blackmail during that morning. just like "if you tell anyone, i will murder you then enslave your corpse so no one will ever find the body". but that is a little dark compared to the relatively snarky, sitcom feel that i'm feeling for the rest of the story. i definitely want them to be a sort of odd couple- good friends but coming from very different lives and moralities and personalities. so maybe the blackmail will be something more along the line of "go ahead, tell. who is going to believe you? nope, they're just going to think you finally snapped under the pressure." i don't necessarily want claire to get into necromancy herself, i actually like the idea of her being a little grossed out by the whole thing, but i can see her being incredibly interested in this whole magical side of the world that she never knew existed, this secret history that was never taught in schools. and she's just a good person and it's very clear that edelweiss needs a living friend.


i'm glad that you read through it all and left some comments. they were all very helpful and i'm always happy to talk more about this. ^.^
 

Mewmento

[Yₒᵤ ₐᵣₑ ₜₕₑ ₒcₑₐₙ'ₛ gᵣₐy wₐᵥₑₛ.]
Went through and just read the whole thing.

Characters that come across as relatable, tend to be more understandable and come cross better to any type of crowd. And Edelweiss provides a relatable character. Despite the unique quirk of being into necromany and in med school. I feel that brings in a well needed contrast with her personality as she is a pure white figure with qualms of black during her delve into the dark arts.

It could provide a myriad of new emotions and internal conflict in getting her to be fully understood to others.

I like what I've read so far. :3 Keep up the great work!
 

Le Chat Nécro

most thugged-out dope hoe
Went through and just read the whole thing.

Characters that come across as relatable, tend to be more understandable and come cross better to any type of crowd. And Edelweiss provides a relatable character. Despite the unique quirk of being into necromany and in med school. I feel that brings in a well needed contrast with her personality as she is a pure white figure with qualms of black during her delve into the dark arts.

It could provide a myriad of new emotions and internal conflict in getting her to be fully understood to others.

I like what I've read so far. :3 Keep up the great work!
thanks. particularly for reading the whole thing. i know it can be a slog.
i keep thinking of her and her life like a sitcom or prime-time tv comedy. decently relatable character but in a situation that's just quirky and odd enough to keep the audience invested. she's just like every other struggling twenty-something trying to figure out their life, but she just also happens to know how to raise and communicate with dead people ^.^
 

Mewmento

[Yₒᵤ ₐᵣₑ ₜₕₑ ₒcₑₐₙ'ₛ gᵣₐy wₐᵥₑₛ.]
thanks. particularly for reading the whole thing. i know it can be a slog.
i keep thinking of her and her life like a sitcom or prime-time tv comedy. decently relatable character but in a situation that's just quirky and odd enough to keep the audience invested. she's just like every other struggling twenty-something trying to figure out their life, but she just also happens to know how to raise and communicate with dead people ^.^
Which is what makes it interesting :3
 
D

Deleted member 132067

Guest
I've read that posting in super old threads is rarely appreciated, but since I stumbled over your little post in there: forums.furaffinity.net: Tell me your fursona's backstories!! I hope it's still somewhat appropriate.

Honestly, this was a really good read while I was enduring an hour long bus drive. I'm really glad I read through all of it, not only because it was an effective time killer but more importantly, because I thought it was well written. I mean come on, you even made use of semicolons. That is practically a universal sign of writing skill.
While your Edelweiss (Which, by the way, is a very funny name to me- A German.) is succeeding with most of the things she's doing, I absolutely don't mind it. I think you found a very pleasant and believable balance between an aspiring student and gifted necromancer - And a sometimes socially weird person to be around without a lot of friends. Which is another part I liked reading. She is not "weird" just for the sake of being weird and lacking empathy for added edginess, she's "weird" because of how she grew up and how past events made her. There's this neat model within developmental psychology that states that your Environment, your family and friends, your genes and your own active engagement with your environment all together form what you are. I think you gave an explanation to all of these aspects, as well successfully creating a cohesive conclusion for how all of these things made your character into what she is today.

Now, that's a lot of positive stuff. I would have loved to add something negative as well, since I believe that constructive criticism is the thing that helps people the most, plus it's a thing you asked for.
But, this is just great. Thanks for putting it out here, even if it is a lot to digest. It even inspired me to try something similar in the future, writing is fun!
 

Le Chat Nécro

most thugged-out dope hoe
I've read that posting in super old threads is rarely appreciated, but since I stumbled over your little post in there: forums.furaffinity.net: Tell me your fursona's backstories!! I hope it's still somewhat appropriate.

Honestly, this was a really good read while I was enduring an hour long bus drive. I'm really glad I read through all of it, not only because it was an effective time killer but more importantly, because I thought it was well written. I mean come on, you even made use of semicolons. That is practically a universal sign of writing skill.
While your Edelweiss (Which, by the way, is a very funny name to me- A German.) is succeeding with most of the things she's doing, I absolutely don't mind it. I think you found a very pleasant and believable balance between an aspiring student and gifted necromancer - And a sometimes socially weird person to be around without a lot of friends. Which is another part I liked reading. She is not "weird" just for the sake of being weird and lacking empathy for added edginess, she's "weird" because of how she grew up and how past events made her. There's this neat model within developmental psychology that states that your Environment, your family and friends, your genes and your own active engagement with your environment all together form what you are. I think you gave an explanation to all of these aspects, as well successfully creating a cohesive conclusion for how all of these things made your character into what she is today.

Now, that's a lot of positive stuff. I would have loved to add something negative as well, since I believe that constructive criticism is the thing that helps people the most, plus it's a thing you asked for.
But, this is just great. Thanks for putting it out here, even if it is a lot to digest. It even inspired me to try something similar in the future, writing is fun!
:oops:
You are legit making me blush right now. Thank you so much for the kind words. I'm really glad you enjoyed my ramblings and that I was able to really convey who Edelweiss is.

And I totally picked that name cause I had just watched the Sound of Music. And the irony of her full name basically being "White Black" haha
 
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