I am feel alone and empty inside.

[Rayd]

It certainly won't solve his problem coming to a furry forum full of strangers who won't care by morning. So telling him to basically love and be comfortable with himself certainly can't be the worst fucking thing to respond with.

just my take tho just my take.

while i'm aware, you're very capable of doing that without making assumptions, or blaming them for ignoring said assumptions. if anything it may just discourage them from feeling any different, or trying anything different for that matter. they were feeling a certain way and made a thread about it, which is okay. i don't think it's fair for them to be judged based on a 2 sentence statement under the guise of being blunt and truthful. and if that's all you two were planning on doing, maybe you shouldn't have posted on it.

i only wanted to offer a different view and it's clear to me that i wouldn't have tried had i known neither of you would take to it kindly. knowledge you have doesn't always apply to the things you think it does. that's all i was trying to say. OP is allowed to express their feelings no matter how little context they want to give. it's still valid.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

while i'm aware, you're very capable of doing that without making assumptions, or blaming them for ignoring said assumptions. if anything it may just discourage them from feeling any different, or trying anything different for that matter. they were feeling a certain way and made a thread about it, which is okay. i don't think it's fair for them to be judged based on a 2 sentence statement under the guise of being blunt and truthful. and if that's all you two were planning on doing, maybe you shouldn't have posted on it.

i only wanted to offer a different view and it's clear to me that i wouldn't have tried had i known neither of you would take to it kindly. knowledge you have doesn't always apply to the things you think it does. that's all i was trying to say. OP is allowed to express their feelings no matter how little context they want to give. it's still valid.

Oh my god you're so far up your own ass it's incredible.

Your "different view" is "enable someone in their attempts to feed an unhealthy habit because it makes me look UwU and nice".

If your ability to feel good hinges ENTIRELY upon other people telling you they love you before they even KNOW you, you're utterly hopeless. You're going to run face-first into the brick wall of reality and shriek like a scalded cat about the cruel, uncaring world before retreating back into cheap dopamine fixes from online strangers who don't know you from Adam and couldn't care less beyond the cheap thrill of looking like the nicest person in the thread. At the end of the day, YOU are responsible for yourself, for your emotions and how you act on them, NOBODY ELSE IS, and if you start handing people the ability to determine how good you feel on a given day you're going to be miserable more often than not.

 

[Rayd]

Oh my god you're so far up your own ass it's incredible.

Your "different view" is "enable someone in their attempts to feed an unhealthy habit because it makes me look UwU and nice".

If your ability to feel good hinges ENTIRELY upon other people telling you they love you before they even KNOW you, you're utterly hopeless. You're going to run face-first into the brick wall of reality and shriek like a scalded cat about the cruel, uncaring world before retreating back into cheap dopamine fixes from online strangers who don't know you from Adam and couldn't care less beyond the cheap thrill of looking like the nicest person in the thread. At the end of the day, YOU are responsible for yourself, for your emotions and how you act on them, NOBODY ELSE IS, and if you start handing people the ability to determine how good you feel on a given day you're going to be miserable more often than not.

i think you just take yourself too seriously man. i'd rather get a "thrill" from being considerate than thinking you're giving tough-love when really you're just being an ignorant dickhead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

 

[Ennui Elemental]

i think you just take yourself too seriously man. i'd rather get a "thrill" from being considerate than thinking you're giving tough-love when really you're just being an ignorant dickhead. ¯\_(ツ)_/¯

You're a shallow, emotionally stunted edgelord. And a Californian, but I fucking repeat myself so much these days.

 

[Rayd]

edgelord.

well now, isn't that the pot calling the kettle black.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

View attachment 121357
View attachment 121358
well now, isn't that the pot calling the kettle black.

>uses light mode
Never mind you're just sick

 

[Rayd]

>uses light mode
Never mind you're just sick

not normally a light mode user, the day dark mode was released i turned it on and thought it was uglee. not enough shades of grey/black in some areas, too many in others. lots of weird design choices too. also not a fan of the random yellow here and there. a rare case in which i find solid glaring white easier on the eyes.

 

[TyraWadman]

not normally a light mode user, the day dark mode was released i turned it on and thought it was uglee. not enough shades of grey/black in some areas, too many in others. lots of weird design choices too. also not a fan of the random yellow here and there. a rare case in which i find solid glaring white easier on the eyes.

Can verify I use lightmode and am sick.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

Offering (at the most UNCHARITABLE of interpretations) neutrally-toned advice about self-improvement and learning to get along with one's self and being the kind of person people want to have as a friend in the first place and getting shrieked at for being a meaniehead giving "tough love" as a result makes me want to pull people's teeth out with fucking channel-locks
I care NOTHING for internet hugs and UwU I WUB U because it's hollow meaningless tripe, when I offer advice I AM TRYING TO BE NICE you fucking tool

 

[Deleted member 127940]

If I had a dollar every time some furry made a "i r lonley" post on FAF I'd have my own private island by now.

Or maybe I'm not being considerate enough of people's feelings here. This is going to sound edgy to the max but loneliness is legitimately an emotion that I don't really recall ever feeling in any meaningful capacity so the idea of loneliness being akin to literal torture is just a bizarre concept to me.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

Unless you are rural as fuck and have no Internet you are surrounded by possible interpersonal connections and your unwillingness and/or inability to forge and maintain relationships of any sort should never be considered someone else's problem if for no other reason than you likely won't enjoy their solution

 

[TyraWadman]

I do believe a lot of people tend to stretch the truth. But if anyone's had the same luck as me, I'd also understand their struggle. XD
Maybe OP is desperate for romance. Maybe they just want to find their place in a social group.
Maybe they forget they even made an FAF account!

 

[Ennui Elemental]

I do believe a lot of people tend to stretch the truth. But if anyone's had the same luck as me, I'd also understand their struggle. XD
Maybe OP is desperate for romance. Maybe they just want to find their place in a social group.
Maybe they forget they even made an FAF account!

Romance, actual romance, is a bit of work. Arguably worth it, but that's not the kind of investment people typically put in via the Internet. Quick, fun cyber-rolls in the hay will fall into your lap in the fandom, but that's not the same thing.

Socialization can also be a bit of work, and I find socialization via the Internet to be shallower if not just outright warped in its dynamic, but you have to REALLY be an incredibly disagreeable person to not find a spot for that. If I can manage that both IRL to an extent and on the Internet, I struggle to imagine what kind of person cannot (beyond folks on the spectrum who have varying degrees of difficulty with that from the outset).

 

[TyraWadman]

Romance, actual romance, is a bit of work. Arguably worth it, but that's not the kind of investment people typically put in via the Internet. Quick, fun cyber-rolls in the hay will fall into your lap in the fandom, but that's not the same thing.

I can agree with that. 100% of my online dating has always been based on urges and lies. Now that I look at it, I suppose a lot of them were actually furries (if not closeted ones at the time). I don't do online relationships because I don't expect anything from them anymore. XD

Socialization can also be a bit of work, and I find socialization via the Internet to be shallower if not just outright warped in its dynamic, but you have to REALLY be an incredibly disagreeable person to not find a spot for that. If I can manage that both IRL to an extent and on the Internet, I struggle to imagine what kind of person cannot (beyond folks on the spectrum who have varying degrees of difficulty with that from the outset).

It's incredibly easy to talk to someone online, but at the same time, it's not like I don't get social interaction with customers at work. It's just not satisfying. I don't care for random small talk or whatever holiday is coming up. I don't care if the sun is out or not. I want something more fulfilling and I don't want to have to pretend to be something I'm not, just to try and fit in somewhere. I'm not sure about OP, but for a long time, that was something I struggled with. You can be surrounded by so many people and still be/feel so very alone.

Nowadays, for me, it's just 'people be craycray in a bad way'. Anyone who has the guts to strike up a conversation IRL with me is (more or less) mentally disturbed and I'm one of the few new people in town that is oblivious to their history. Any time I do try to be friendly and strike up pleasant conversation (even at geek/game stores) I get rejected by their social group via awkward silence/watching them shuffle off to a new location. Then of course, there are SO many people out there just looking for some action/romance, they won't even consider befriending you unless you match their sexual interests.

Whether or not OPs post was genuine is still debatable of course, but to vent something like this is easy for me to sympathize with. Life is whack, yo, and the process of elimination is exhausting. Sometimes people just need a gentle push in the right direction (towards something they might not have even known about) or a bit of networking.

 

[Outré]

I think it’s okay to get to know someone a bit online and even become friends. I probably have 1 or 2 friends that I’ve known forever but never met. People seem a lot less afraid to be themselves online. I’m no different myself either. I guess a way a person talks and their personality can change your persecution of them though but I don’t think it would stop me from wanting to be friends with someone. When it comes to romance and having a relationship. I think it’s okay to meet someone online, but I think it’s better to meet before entering into a relationship. There is a lot you miss about a person from only talking online… it can be easy to develop a psychological attraction to someone if you talk to them online long enough though, so you have to be careful.

For me it think I would only want a relationship with someone who I could be best friends with. I could care less about sex as it relates to the relationship.

Haha, k. Now I think I’m just incoherently replying to bits and pieces of different comments. But, yeah.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

Sometimes people just need a gentle push in the right direction

It wasn't like my advice was harsh. Blunt in the sense of being direct, sure, but conflating telling someone that their best bet is to be someone people WANT to be friends/partners with, with verbally brutalizing them is right the fuck out and tells me that someone present has never been on the receiving end of real harsh shit.

 

[TyraWadman]

It wasn't like my advice was harsh. Blunt in the sense of being direct, sure, but conflating telling someone that their best bet is to be someone people WANT to be friends/partners with, with verbally brutalizing them is right the fuck out and tells me that someone present has never been on the receiving end of real harsh shit.

I didn't think your advice was harsh (there are a lot of people that don't always seem to realize they're the problem, so I think it's important). But I certainly don't have any expectations of anyone picking up advice. People will almost always skip over whatever they don't want to hear and evade important questions they'd rather not admit to.

Not quite sure I understand the last half though. I thought Rayd was just implying that it might be better to get the full story first, before assuming the automatic worst.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

Not quite sure I understand the last half though. I thought Rayd was just implying that it might be better to get the full story first, before assuming the automatic worst.

OP didn't seem to think that was necessary so I worked with what I was given. If they WANT to elaborate, they're welcome to, but if Rayd's accusing me of making assumptions he's throwing stones in his glass house. Assuming I was dunking on OP with a pretty damn milquetoast take all things considered and berating me for being mean and jumping to conclusions when he has the exact same amount of info I do and has even LESS to go on with me is like... the fuck? I'm not going to interrogate OP, if they want to CORRECT me in my assumption that's their prerogative.

 

[TyraWadman]

OP didn't seem to think that was necessary so I worked with what I was given. If they WANT to elaborate, they're welcome to, but if Rayd's accusing me of making assumptions he's throwing stones in his glass house. Assuming I was dunking on OP with a pretty damn milquetoast take all things considered and berating me for being mean and jumping to conclusions when he has the exact same amount of info I do and has even LESS to go on with me is like... the fuck? I'm not going to interrogate OP, if they want to CORRECT me in my assumption that's their prerogative.

The reply he made to Judge Spear might be because this isn't the first time they're unloaded on people like this. Cynics and pessimism as abundant here at times. I don't think it was necessarily (if at all) focused on you. But that's just my interpretation of course.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

The reply he made to Judge Spear might be because this isn't the first time they're unloaded on people like this. Cynics and pessimism as abundant here at times. I don't think it was necessarily (if at all) focused on you. But that's just my interpretation of course.

Judge's assessment wasn't incorrect as near as I can tell and I didn't get "mean" or "harsh" from it. A tinge of bitter fremdscham sure, but if Rayd is just going to get upset about people pointing things out like they have been many times before, I'd remind him that this thread does a good job of vindicating Judge.

 

[Rayd]

Judge's assessment wasn't incorrect as near as I can tell and I didn't get "mean" or "harsh" from it. A tinge of bitter fremdscham sure, but if Rayd is just going to get upset about people pointing things out like they have been many times before, I'd remind him that this thread does a good job of vindicating Judge.

i'm not upset i just think your reaction to all of this is a little silly, that's all. i wasn't aware of how judge is on this forum before someone brought me to the side and told me. i don't come on this forum much. maybe once or twice a month. i gave a fair point of view to somebody else who i thought would react far better than they apparently typically do and then for whatever reason you spent 2 pages attacking me personally. it's just kind of awkward. i have no ill will towards you.

 

[Ennui Elemental]

i'm not upset i just think your reaction to all of this is a little silly, that's all. i wasn't aware of how judge is on this forum before someone brought me to the side and told me. i don't come on this forum much. maybe once or twice a month. i gave a fair point of view to somebody else who i thought would react far better than they apparently typically do and then for whatever reason you spent 2 pages attacking me personally. it's just kind of awkward. i have no ill will towards you.

I don't blame him for being a pessimist or cynic, this fandom gets legit depressing. That said I'm not thrilled about an attempt to advise being framed as armchair psychology. The words OP used are huge blinking neon warning signs, and with no better way to divine intent beyond those words I chose to address it as seriously as they seem to want others to.

 

[Alpha527]

Annnd completely skipped over. lmfao
The advice people need to hear most is what gets ignored or vilified on this forum like clockwork, I swear to god.

They hear what they want to hear unfortunately. The true solution to the problem is never the solution that people want to take.

 

[ArtGirl205]

I need someone ;w;
I just can't stand being alone anymore! It's a torture

Aww I know what it's like to feel lonely
if you need a friend I'm going to be active here

 

[Smalldoggy1010]

Same..