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Mental Distortions

LuciantheHugmage

The Mistbinder
Does anyone else have issues with these?

I mean, say you're just hanging out with someone, do you ever get the idea that maybe they don't like you? Or that they secretly think you're stupid?

It's something that happens to me a lot, as well as a few other things. It's really starting to get me stressed, because I know it's not true, but still...
 

zyther kaldrok

the strange hyena
yep its kinda like the angel and devil on your shoulder. i would call it our minds thinking but we can here its normal its just sometimes its more acute
 

AppleButt

Well-Known Member
I have them too.

Doesn’t matter how nice people are to me.

They hate me. Even though they 100% don’t hate me. They do.
 

Dongding

The sheep
I used to but I still don't know if I was mistaken or not. In my case I feel like it's commonly more accurate to say the person is simply being selfish/inconsiderate rather than hating me.

People are self centered and two-faced generally. Genuine people are immediately recognizable talking to a single time. It's obvious.
 

Astus

Well Known Foxxo
I have those type of thoughts quite regularly. It plays into my social anxiety a bit and is usually associated with people I care about. For example; if me and my BF are talking about... idk... pizza. And I have told him a few times about a month ago that I really like plain pizza, and he asks me what type of pizza I like because he forgot... well then my brain immediately jumps to "see he wasn't listening, he just doesn't care that much". Then it goes to "well its not very important" and then "well even if it's not important, if he's not listening in general doesn't that mean he could miss out on important things? Is he trying to help you be happy or is he mooching off you?" And it basically goes on and on...

You can rationalize all you want about it, but in the end it's not really possible to get those thoughts out of your head unless you distract yourself with something else so long as you know that you're being irrational yourself
 

Inkblooded

Him...
Banned
paranoia is my entire life
fun fact i never truly feel alone, i always feel like im being watched or broadcasted somehow. it sucks but you get used to it
 
S

Scales42

Guest
I usually think the worst of other people. Sometimes even family, I just constanstly feel like everything and especially everyone in the world is a threat to me.
 
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lupi900

Guest
Online friendships are horrid for that. When i just stop posting in that group, come back much later with them arguing over my flaws. But when there called on there bullshit they lash out like self unaware pricks.
 

Friskyaa123

狐を殺すのに、兎を寄越すな。
eh I definitely maybe worry about biphobia in real life, like dear God can I maybe just not look at either sex without even an element of 'checking out' and if no 'squick' is detected with either sex am I instantly Basic Instinct or one of those other movies? lol I'm kind of avoiding Starbucks at the moment maybe :(

there's a woman there who might be bi, and she's like active in church stuff too and they just say she's 'her' or something? I dunno how to negotiate that just being like 'good for you' without being gros either
 
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Infrarednexus

Guest
I have a problem of always assuming the worst about what people think about me. I feel like everything I say and do is an embarrassing mistake that pushes others further away from me. I even feel this way about my own family, even though they tell me it's not true. I keep telling myself it's just paranoia, but words alone don't get far. Your not alone. A lot of people feel the same way.
 

Telnac

Fundamentalist Heretic
I have a problem of always assuming the worst about what people think about me. I feel like everything I say and do is an embarrassing mistake that pushes others further away from me. I even feel this way about my own family, even though they tell me it's not true. I keep telling myself it's just paranoia, but words alone don't get far. Your not alone. A lot of people feel the same way.
Oy. Been there. It took me a while to stop caring what others think. What's important is being comfortable in your own skin. Don't let the opinions of others drag you down.
 
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Guifrog

Blue Frog | Avatar by Lenago
Not so long ago I've learned about my Asperger traits. When I was 3, my mother took me to a neurologist as I demonstrated a "different language" to which I'd communicate, but the autism hypothesis had been discarded at that moment.

Up to recent years, though, I'd gradually gotten more bothered and anxious about my inability of getting the cues of social interactions when I'm in a group (mostly in a face-to-face situation, but it can happen on an online chat too). It's easier to talk to one person only, but having more people than that can get overwhelming to the point that I can't follow the conversation and, if I force myself too much, I can get sick.

It's been 3 years or so that I go the therapist. I've been trying to resignify things ever since, as she mentioned how different my pace is from most people. But if people feel okay about my occasional far away stares (I've already heard TONS on how it looked like I was not paying attention even though I was) and silent behavior, I think I'm okay too. :D
 

Skychickens

Late Healer Ferret
There's a term in psychology for it...and I can't remember what it is. Mystical thinking? My most recent therapist says it is an issue I have.

I have a lot of trouble with it with my wife honestly. She is not always the best at showing emotional cues so I can't always tell what's going on. I have enough trouble with it as is and then here she is. With her sad+sleepy+angry+overwhelmed same facial expression and body posture. Seriously I have to manually read these. I don't just get it. So if you sit badly or you have a sort of mixed signal I haven't the FAINTEST idea that you mean this. All my research says you mean that. Then I am low on natural human empathy (or something like that. I can panic over animals but I kinda sit awkwardly when someone is trying to use me to feel better you know?)

So yeah. I know how it is...
 

WithMyBearHands

Smudge and arrogant
Yes, yes, a hundred times yes. I can't ever shake the feeling that everyone has ulterior motives. Really makes interaction bleak for me, though I've gotten good at playing it off. It's super frustrating always having to question my perception because I know I'm overthinking everything, I know that can't be why people do or say things--but what if it is--NO, it is not. But I can't tell what is a "gut instinct/bad feeling" about someone and what is me making crazy assumptions.
 

Friskyaa123

狐を殺すのに、兎を寄越すな。
Yes, yes, a hundred times yes. I can't ever shake the feeling that everyone has ulterior motives

I have the opposite view that people are caught up in their own world sometimes :( So I just try to say stuff that's really just saying 'life isn't dull/crushing /all/ the time', hopefully it doesn't come across as talking about myself, I'm more talking about amazing stuff you can read on the internet if you don't just stick to Facebook etc.
 

Troj

Your Friendly Neighborhood Dino Therapist
I think almost everyone does to some degree or another.

After all, we see ourselves and the world through a glass darkly, so we have to draw inferences or jump to conclusions that may be wrong.

When we have a pattern or a habit of drawing inferences or telling ourselves stories that are so distorted that they actively hurt us and/or others and negatively affect our ability to function in the world, that's when it reaches the level of an actual illness.
 

Friskyaa123

狐を殺すのに、兎を寄越すな。
eh I actually /got out/ for the first time in a while, I think I've inferred here I had a 'fluid' moment recently and it weirded me the heck out, definitely feeling much better about real life sexual stuff, for one thing. But yeah it was making me worry about biphobia stuff :xxxxxx
 

Izar

MadeFurYou sheppy boi.
Does anyone else have issues with these?

I mean, say you're just hanging out with someone, do you ever get the idea that maybe they don't like you? Or that they secretly think you're stupid?

It's something that happens to me a lot, as well as a few other things. It's really starting to get me stressed, because I know it's not true, but still...


I sometimes feel like that but I’m really good at going for casual bluntness. For example if I get a weird look at something I say, I might say, what? Why are you looking at me like that? Lol people can lie but it’s kind of easy to tell. If I feel someone is treating me odd on an ongoing basis, I’d probably say it’s a compatibility issue and move on past the relationship lol
 
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Decem

Guest
It's called paranoia and being insecure. Talk to someone about it.
 

kranch

Mysterious stranger
well it's good to read that i wasn't the only one, when i was a teen i remember having some "friends" and talk with them a lot but one day when i really needed them they just ignore me and it was horrible to me because it was in front of everyone, that made me paranoid about the people around me for years. These days i really dont care as much about what people think of me because now i know how to recognize the people actually care about me
 

Rant

Haters Gonna Hate
I have it too, I've always been suspicious of anyone nice to me because of severe bullying. Like I always think it's a trap and it takes a long time before I willingly reach out.
 

AppleButt

Well-Known Member
I have it too, I've always been suspicious of anyone nice to me because of severe bullying. Like I always think it's a trap and it takes a long time before I willingly reach out.

Fortunately, I was never bullied.

However, I don’t take compliments seriously much anymore because I would get those sarcastic/fake compliments a lot when I was younger.
 

DarkoKavinsky

ʎʇʇɐq ʇıq ɐ
Frequently. Granted I've noticed where I'm at people genuinely don't give a shit. It helps reinforce very negative ideas of world being exposed to people who honestly aren't good at all.
 

Gronix

Catless Cat Lady
This is pretty much wishful thinking, except that you're subconsciously wishing for something bad to happen to you, it would be associated with low self esteem I assume.
On the other hand, it could just be an unlucky chain of bad events in your life that lead you to have distorted 'expectations' of people and society.

Either way, that's not good at all, the background for it doesn't matter because it shouldn't be excused, it's a form of self-harm without justification.
Y'all need optimism, realistic optimism at that.

Not saying that shitty people don't exist, but immediately assuming the worst before someone proves themselves as such is really bad for your mental health.
Also, it's good to learn how to judge people correctly, which can greatly help manage the amount, and direction of your efforts and resources regarding people interaction, most people I've noticed are afraid of judging people, afraid of being portrayed as judgemental, but nothing's wrong with it as long as you're right and keep an open mind about it.
 
S

Some Moron

Guest
I usually think I'm annoying... Despite my name, I try not to be annoying in person.
 
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