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Simo

Simo

Professional Watermelon Farmer
backpawscratcher said:
*pads around room looking for secret skunky watermelon stash*

*gives up looking and eats house plants instead*
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*hides melons*

It's the off season or I'd share!
 
connortheskunk

connortheskunk

definitely did not look at yiff last night.
backpawscratcher said:
You were trying to invade Canada not that long ago :D
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:confused: Deja vu?

I must've missed it when Black Burn said it, but someone on a different site made a joke about dominating the world--starting in Canada, and to message him if anybody had any advice to give. Well, obviously he was kidding, but I messaged him anyway with a pretty long (slightly) logical explanation of his best options when trying to take over the world. He didn't respond which makes me think he may have taken me seriously (it is not a close-knit community like this one so I didn't even know him before I sent the message). I swear I'm not crazy though!! *shocked*

Anyway, here is how it went, in case anyone is interested in reading it. It might give you a laugh or two, but I wouldn't be surprised at all if it didn't:

This is what he posted in the forum:
On topic I did the same thing and so far so good our plan is to take over the world I was thinking that we should start with Canada but any recommendations are more than welcome and will be met with some kind of title once we take over
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I responded to this by sending him this in a private message titled "Taking Over the World":
I saw your plan in the GTASC thread of taking over the world. As the ruler of a galaxy in a different dimension, I thought I might help you out. Now, according to ancient Gregorian strategy, you have two ways of approaching this:

1) Start with the small or weak countries, hope nobody notices, build your army and take over the larger countries once you have a large enough army. Become supreme leader of the world, etc etc, you know the deal (disadvantages: takes longer to finish, mutiny and treason more likely to occur)

2) Start with the large countries. Once you've taken over a large country, declare war on other large countries, go from there, then once you've taken all the superpowers, cleanup all the small countries. (disadvantages: a lotharder to get started)

I noticed you mentioned starting with Canada in your post. While this may seem like a good choice due to the low population density and large area, it is likely to gain a lot of attention, especially from the United States, and you likely will be finished before you even get started. If you want to go with this route and minimize attention, I would start with a country such as Mongolia. Large area, weak government yet strong army, and less likely to gain attention from larger countries.

Another option you have is the United States. I'm sure you know the current government breakdown that is happening. Continue to monitor it, and if it isn't resolved in a month or so, you know what to do. Bold, risky, but it'll pay off if you manage to pull it off.

If you are going to go with the first option, I would recommend starting in central and southern Africa. Many countries are currently in a state of civil war, anarchy and/or national poverty, such as Zimbabwe, Sudan/South Sudan, Somalia, Niger, Nigeria, and DRC. Start here and expand. If you manage to take over all of Africa, you will have almost a sixth of the world's population on your side. Countries to watch out for are South Africa, Egypt, Madagascar, Algeria, Liberia, and Morocco. Superpower countries will definitely immediately take note if you try to conquer any of the mentioned countries, so I would recommend staying away from them until you are already noticed.

One last thing, once your army starts to grow to hundreds of millions of people, purge all your high ranking officers. It was one of the main causes of Hitler's downfall, and it worked out alright for Stalin. You can't trust anyone when you start to become an influential leader.

Good luck. I don't expect anything in return for this advice, but I wish you the best on your journey.

--Connor
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Loffi

Loffi

Well-Known Member
How's everyone doing today?
 
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