I missed this thread when it was happening because I was busy all weekend, but I'm sorry for all you've been through, Harb. Feel free to reach out to me if you feel like talking to me of all people for whatever reason.
It's unfair to lose a pet when they're so young, and putting down a pet can definitely lead to doubts about having another. However, they can add so much to our lives (and we add to theirs), and in the end, it's usually worth it. You questioned whether you can cope with things like this or worse, but you will cope. Coping doesn't mean a lack of pain. It just means that at some point you adapt in such a way that the pain doesn't control everything else. You have community support. You have family. You have Yuki. Those things don't negate the loss, but they can help temper the pain.
By the way, Yuki's reactions right now make sense, and as much as it may be hard to watch her go through this, it will pass. Cats have a good understanding of death when they see it, but they don't get it otherwise. Eventually, she'll learn that Luna's not coming back, and she'll stop the whole "looking behind doors and under couches" thing. In the mean time, it's up to you guys to make sure your surviving cat is taken care of.
Thanks for the support everyone, its been nice to speak to people with this. She was put down shortly after i mentioned it, we've only just got over putting down Belle when feline HIV i think it was took her within a week. Still hasnt sunk in yet, want to let it out but havent had the chance yet today, my mums on the way back home with her now, we've been living here for so long im not even sure where I can bury her yet, had to bury Belle because my dad was too much of a wreck, as hard as it is i'll do it again to relieve him. Just not ready to see her again after the accident. I still cant get the images out of my head of the blood on the mats or the diarrhea all over the side, only 3 days till my fucking birthday aswell. Just been avoiding the kitchen where it happened like the plague. Mums going to be here any minute, the moon is out though which is nice.
Harb, I own 3 cats in pretty attached to. My grandma's boyfriend used to own a dog until she had to be put down. I was heartbroken then, but I'm not sure how well I could handle my cats needing to go. I'm very attached to them, and its very clear all 3 sisters love me as well. It would be a nightmare if they had to leave.
Feel free to talk to me however you like, Harb. Messaging, Skype, doesn't matter to me. Whatever is easier for you. I understand what you're going through. It is a nightmare to lose animals that you love and love you back. Dump whatever you want on me, I can take it.
Thanks both. My mum just came back, she just looked like she was sleeping, she just looked perfect and as soft as she always has been, my mum found her a spot by the flowers and buried her herself, i offered but she wanted to do it.
Ugh...that just sucks man -_-. I read a study that ranked stress levels once. Actually said it was worse to lose a pet than a relative...and I know all too well. As others said, try to comfort your Dad, and the other cat, and yourself. At least she won't be in pain anymore *hug*.
That's terrible I've never witnessed such a thing and I hate it that you did. Try your best to think of positive things and not to replay what happened in your head over and over again. My best wishes to you and condolences . I hope you're doing much better now!
Thanks everyone, i know its still pretty early but every days only feeling much worse so far, i cant help but thinking of all the stuff she didnt get a chance to experience, and it does replay in my head seeing her in the state she was in every time i go into that fucking kitchen. Been trying to stay with Yuki throughout the day but i just keep thinking of Luna when Yuki goes off wandering and crying for someone to play with, its hard just to look at Luna's toys she was playing with only last week.
Feel like shit, sick and achy all over, half of the time none of this even feels real, not blaming anyone but if the slightest fucking thing had been different, she would be alive and playing with Yuki, it just downright shouldnt have happened, sometimes it feels like it didnt happen, like it was just a nightmare, but then it actually did.
Im just not coping well, my dad seems ok i guess, i wasnt sure if he was just hiding it though, like he juts kept saying "you get used to it". But whats only making things worse is my fucking sister fucking off with her mormon "friends". She's constantly out all the time which makes my dad furious who then stresses out my mum about it. Maybe she's using her friends to cope i thought but then again she was doing this before it happened, and in times like this everyone needs each other, im not holding it together and everyones arguing like nothing happened/
Got in touch with a bereavement helpline and listened to advice but i just cant stop feeling bad and thinking of her, havent been able to eat properly since it happened and now im starting to lose sleep, was planning on going up town for my birthday tomorrow but thats the last thing i want now.
I just found this thread and I'm so sorry for your families loss. I know from personal experience that loosing a pet is just as traumatic as loosing a human family member. I know that nothing that I can say will help you feel better, but I hope that you can find comfort in something. Hang in there.