Last week my Japanese teacher talked to me about tatemae.
It's the name for Japanese way of not saying things directly in order to avoid conflict.
I've responded to his question on whether I've ever watched Death Note in a very straightforward manner - "No." So he raised the subject and told me of other possible responses I could have given, specially in a context where the asking person might be overexcited about the anime themselves. "Oh, I have heard about it!" "Indeed, I haven't but it does seem very cool!", or the (in)famous "chotto" that can be translated as "a little". I recall having a bit of a hard time figuring the concept, because saying I have watched even "a little" isn't true. I mean, what would I do if the other party started demanding my opinion about characters, episodes and general storyline?
So today I was walking with my long time friend and there was a point when he said "You wanna go back?". Knowing him, I instinctively figured he was tired. But if I look into the nuance of such a sentence, he never told me that directly, instead pointing to me through his wording. Do I want to go back? "Sure!", I said, more concerned about him than myself.
I guess this is tatemae - more about being polite and caring for the other than choosing to say "chotto/a little". Never thought about it, but now I assume every culture has their own. Let's see what my teacher thinks the next few days