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Predators and Prey

ben909

vaporeon character != mushroom characters
Puts a potato on the table if we are talking about food
 

ben909

vaporeon character != mushroom characters
Sees if you hat is still a spider
 

ben909

vaporeon character != mushroom characters
Adds celery to the mix because tomorrow is sheep stew day
 

ben909

vaporeon character != mushroom characters
But it was a spider
 
D

Domjoe414

Guest
There are so many things wrong with this I can barely list them all. But I can give it a go:

1. I’m obligated by contract with the Council to remain heterosexual if I wish to remain (or, re-become) a Knight (in order to facilitate the saving of damsels in distress).
1a. I am, in fact, of my own free will and volition, heterosexual anyways.
1b. Incompatible anatomies means that biological heirs will be out of the question, meaning that any children I do acquire will not be recognized as mine by the Council and will not be eligible to all the benefits the title of “Knight” would ordinarily entail.

2. @Guifrog is a rat, and I am not.
2a. Guifrog is naturally a frog, and I am not,
2b. I’m attempting to avoid as much TF as possible, so these are likely not to be rectified.

3. Guifrog secretes hallucinogenic drugs 24/7, preventing physical contact if I’m to remain an upstanding citizen, much less a Knight.
3a. I cannot simply decide I’m totally down for drugs even if I wanted to, because every time I do them, something horrifying happens. For example, the last few hours.

4. @Skittles, @Cosmic-FS and co. seem to be under the impression that I am not particularly masculine and as such would be entirely fine with donning a dress. I am not.
4a. Why would I even wear a dress, in the event I have a wedding I will be the groom and as such will be wearing a tux, or even better, full armor (so I don’t get assasinated).
4b. I do not want to wear a dress, masculinity dismantlement and irregularity of the position as groom notwithstanding!

5. I never proposed.
5a. Neither did Guifrog.

6. They knocked me out and kidnapped me.

7. Before this point, I did like Guifrog, as a friend. Now I’m not even sure that much is the case.

I’d rather die a virgin and heirless than suffer the utter, abject affront to all that is holy and right that this is.

...why did I waste all this escaping time compiling a pointless list?

*runs*
Ah there's no need to object my friend. You knighthood is obviously a lost cause at this point, I'm sure @Guifrog wouldn't mind doing the proposing, and you can always adopt an heir. And as for a dress:
You've worn a tunic before, just think of the dress as a long tunic.
Besides, I'm afraid the Glaceon hair isn't...er...very masculine. And you don't have a beard. In fact, you'd look fine in a dress I'd say.
@Skittles? back me up on that one?
 

Arishipshape

TFed Ex-Knight
B-but I'm j-j-just s-s-sayi-

-mmmmMmMph??! õÒ
Oh no, Guifrog’s incapacitated, guess he won’t be attending any weddings any time soon. Darn. Real bummer.
Ah there's no need to object my friend. You knighthood is obviously a lost cause at this point, I'm sure @Guifrog wouldn't mind doing the proposing, and you can always adopt an heir. And as for a dress:
You've worn a tunic before, just think of the dress as a long tunic.
Besides, I'm afraid the Glaceon hair isn't...er...very masculine. And you don't have a beard. In fact, you'd look fine in a dress I'd say.
@Skittles? back me up on that one?
How. Dare. You.
As of now, me and Ben909’s sinister plots to overthrow the Council are proceeding quite smoothly, and I’m sure the new leadership will be at least slightly less corrupt and give me back my title without incident.
If a dress was a long tunic, they’d call it a “long tunic”, not a “dress”. Call a spade a spade!
What, these? *runs finger through hair strands* These are badass, and you will never convince me otherwise. Even humans are improved by locks like these. And of course I don’t have a beard, I have fur everywhere now, you wouldn’t notice one!
I don’t care how I’d look in a dress!! I’d be too humiliated to notice!
You completely failed to address 1a, 1b, 2, 2a, 2b, 3, 3a, 4a, 4b, 6, or 7.
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Is this a morning that is indeed good, whether I like it or not? Or merely a morning on which to be good?
Would you rather I said bad morning? :eek:

*Head tilt.*
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Indeed. Twould sum up my morning nicely; I’m still on the run from wedding-obsessed maniacs!
Doesn't mean it is bad! You need to look at the positive knight fren!

*nodnod*
 

Arishipshape

TFed Ex-Knight
Doesn't mean it is bad! You need to look at the positive knight fren!

*nodnod*
What positive!? My existence has been naught but drug-addled, touch tormented, title-losing TFing misery ever since I set foot on the diety-forsaken rock that is PvP!!

...

I’ll grant that’s a tad extreme. Maybe there have been the occasional fun time. And I’ve definitely learned a lot about myself and the others here. And I guess the food isn’t half bad.

BUT STILL
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I’ll grant that’s a tad extreme. Maybe there have been the occasional fun time. And I’ve definitely learned a lot about myself and the others here. And I guess the food isn’t half bad.
See mistew knight! It isn't bad! Look at me, i'm fricken tiny!

*Nodnod*

but I'm not all poopy like you!
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I’ve been cursed with small size myself on many occasions.
And how dare you describe me as fecal matter. I should challenge you to a duel!
A knight would challenge a smaller, less capable being to a duel..

*I say in a slight challenge to your honor.*

Anybody who you can easily beat.

*giggles and scurries on.*
 

Arishipshape

TFed Ex-Knight
A knight would challenge a smaller, less capable being to a duel..

*I say in a slight challenge to your honor.*

Anybody who you can easily beat.

*giggles and scurries on.*
I’ll challenge all who affront my honor, great or small. I care not about my foe’s size, for good or for ill! I’ll fight for justice and honor, regardless of the odds of a battle! Have at thee! With what weapons shall our duel be fought?
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I’ll challenge all who affront my honor, great or small. I care not about my foe’s size, for good or for ill! I’ll fight for justice and honor, regardless of the odds of a battle! Have at thee! With what weapons shall our duel be fought?
*Rolls eyes.*

Knights get so up tight sometimes.

Just... find somebody more, sizable. Heard the saying 'fight somebody your own size' yeah, you're picking on a poor.. poor little rat.

*Sobs.*

You're so scary!!
 

Arishipshape

TFed Ex-Knight
*Rolls eyes.*

Knights get so up tight sometimes.

Just... find somebody more, sizable. Heard the saying 'fight somebody your own size' yeah, you're picking on a poor.. poor little rat.

*Sobs.*

You're so scary!!
We need not have a duel where size is an advantage. We could play Chess.
*tries not to smile at being described as “scary”*
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
We need not have a duel where size is an advantage. We could play Chess.
*tries not to smile at being described as “scary”
Whaaaaaaa!!

*Sobs loudly, lick you just kicked me against a wall.*

This meanie knight is picking on a poor little creature! HELP!
 
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