PSA: About "coming out" as a furry

[WolfoxeCrevan]

Like the person in question's parents accidentally found their gay furry yiff stash.

Actually this will probobaly be the one way my parents find a lot out about me

 

[BoxOrphan]

I just wanted to thank you all for making this topic. I was one of the rare people with a childhood in which everything was treated as evil-- Star Wars, Pokémon, DBZ, you name it. I had no friends and therefore no context as to what was acceptable or not. But this sums it up:

On the topic of "You will not be disowned" I feel it worth a mention, some people do come from families who are anti-everything that doesn't fit into some narrow view of what is "normal" and therefore acceptable. I have met furries who come from such families, but they are often in an extreme minority. The real truth here is that if your family isn't going to be okay with you being furry, they probably will have issues with you being anything else, such as into anime, science fiction, etc.

Generally speaking if you treat something like it's nothing to hide, and you act appropriately and responsibly even very narrow mined families can find it within themselves to just not care.

If I don't act like it's a big deal, neither will other people-- especially in my case since sexuality isn't really involved. As long as I remind myself of that, I should be able to lower my anxiety.

(The parents that hated everything are dead anyway, and I'm not in the same state as any of the churches.)

 

[Deleted member 82554]

You know... Looking back on this thread, I was so naive, knew so little. Four years have passed and with all the crap I know about the fandom now I could write a book.

 

[Zaddict16]

You know... Looking back on this thread, I was so naive, knew so little. Four years have passed and with all the crap I know about the fandom now I could write a book.

You are so right. I havent even been a furry for that long (about six months) and I have seen things and heard stories about peoples lives in this fandom, its just heart breaking.

 

[WolfoxeCrevan]

Ok so I watched this. And then I watched the full video. I hate you.
(I don't really hate you but I'm actually scared right now.)

 

[GreenZone]

Ok so I watched this. And then I watched the full video. I hate you.
(I don't really hate you but I'm actually scared right now.)

why stop at just one? there's 6 of them i wont spoil it but it is a good series you then need to do some code breaking and lore finding to understand it all

 

[guy]

Many non children enjoy cartoons and animal people. That said, the fandom as it is is used as an escape for every aspect of life for some, up to and including sex. This spawns a very adult part of the fandom, which to most uninitiated folks, is a huge turn off. I find "Coming out" to people to be hit and miss, nearly always traumatic, and potentially damaging/ruining to my reputation as a professional. So I almost tell no-one about it, and enjoy it privately, writing stories, browsing what amounts to mostly clean art. Be aware this world is imperfect and dying, and no ideal will ever be in force, there will always be stigma for "Furry", that is just the way things are.

 

[WolfoxeCrevan]

Ok so I've never put my honest opinion on here so... well here goes.

Most furs won't agree with this but I think that "coming out as a furry" is really a thing. With the way our world is now, normies view us as a "sexuality." They think that's what it is. I think that when you sit down with someone and just explain the furry fandom, that is "coming out" as a furry.

And that's all I have to say about that.

 

[defunct]

excellent point, if you treat something like it's no big deal then those around you will likely not treat it like the end of the world. The best way to "come out" as something is too casually mention it if the topic ever becomes relevant. That said, however, there are still a lot of people who look down on it. Scott Chaimberlain, a councilman in Connecticut, was recently forced to resign after news of his being a furry reached the public. An important question to ask is if there's really any benefit to letting those around you know that you're a furry. I know definitively that I am never under any circumstances going to let my friends or family know that I'm a furry because I don't see any real reason to. Always keep in mind what others' opinion of you is, and how it could potentially deteriorate if they got the wrong idea about furries

 

[Crimcyan]

Well here's my story,
My mom asked what If i wanted to dress up for Halloween beacuse i was going out with friends and I wasn't paying attention and on my phone so i accidentally said "a fursuit if I get one"
She replied with "oh thats fine aslong as you are going to the conventions with it and not going out in public"
Thats when i realized what i said then i said i was joking but at least she's fine with furries...

 

[Telnac]

excellent point, if you treat something like it's no big deal then those around you will likely not treat it like the end of the world. The best way to "come out" as something is too casually mention it if the topic ever becomes relevant. That said, however, there are still a lot of people who look down on it. Scott Chaimberlain, a councilman in Connecticut, was recently forced to resign after news of his being a furry reached the public. An important question to ask is if there's really any benefit to letting those around you know that you're a furry. I know definitively that I am never under any circumstances going to let my friends or family know that I'm a furry because I don't see any real reason to. Always keep in mind what others' opinion of you is, and how it could potentially deteriorate if they got the wrong idea about furries

IMO I think it was more his comment that he tolerated rape than the fact that he was a furry that forced his resignation. Public officials need to realize that everything ever said on the Internet is archived forever so it’s best to treat all messages as if they have your name & face attached to them. That applies to everyone, not just furries.

If openly gay ppl can serve in public office why not furries? It will happen eventually. I know a conservative Christian Republican who’s a furry & is considering running for office. He’s not “out of the closet” to anyone but his closest friends & family tho. I think he should make his status as a furry public before running for office. Be upfront about it and it’s far less of a scandal.

 

[BahgDaddy]

A common topic that seems to be brought up in here people "coming out" as a furry to their friends and family. This is a really bad idea. Here's why:

-Furry is not a sexuality.

We can debate until the end of time about whether or not furry is a hobby or lifestyle. However, it is certainly not a sexuality. As a result, there is no need to treat it as such. It only makes things weird.

-You will not be disowned for being a furry.

People seem to act like being a furry is this massive taboo that will get you disowned, like being homosexual in a homophobic family. However, this is not the case. Not only do the majority of people not even know what a furry is, nobody really cares.

-It will only make things awkward.

If you're worried your parents or friends will think you're a weirdo because you're a furry and its negative stereotypes, then coming out will only make it worse. That just makes it seem like you have something to hide, and that furry is a bigger deal than it really is.

In closing, just calm down and relax. The fandom isn't a big deal. Your parents are not going to throw a bible at you and toss you on the streets because you asked to go to Anthrocon. You'll be fine, I promise.

If you'd like to discuss this topic, or think anything should be added to the OP, post in here.


Edit: In the words of the glorious Trpderp:

Hi,
I'm new, i kinda think furry is sexuality, as least it is to me. Not to everyone certainly. Seems like a lot of people, even furries, have something against furry porn, which is kind of unfair. (esp since like ½ of FA is porn.) Um but I can come out easily, that's not a problem for me, but I dunno.

 

[Jay98]

John:
my family's pretty alternative anyway. i just mentioned it off the cuff once they were just 'how very interesting' in a hugely sarcastic manner.

 

[Yakamaru]

Well here's my story,
My mom asked what If i wanted to dress up for Halloween beacuse i was going out with friends and I wasn't paying attention and on my phone so i accidentally said "a fursuit if I get one"
She replied with "oh thats fine aslong as you are going to the conventions with it and not going out in public"
Thats when i realized what i said then i said i was joking but at least she's fine with furries...

Sounds to me she kinda knows what's up. xD

Well, at least yout mom doesn't seem to care much, though going by her reply, she does care about your social and public image. Furries in general don't exactly have such a good image in the US currently.

 

[Crimcyan]

Sounds to me she kinda knows what's up. xD

Well, at least yout mom doesn't seem to care much, though going by her reply, she does care about your social and public image. Furries in general don't exactly have such a good image in the US currently.

She also told me to go to a anime convention a few times beacuse it would be cool to see all the costumes. I don't even watch anime that much, just DBZ.
I guess I just have one of those W̶e̶i̶r̶d̶ *awsome* families XD

 

[Yakamaru]

She also told me to go to a anime convention a few times beacuse it would be cool to see all the costumes. I don't even watch anime that much, just DBZ.
I guess I just have one of those weird families XD

You misspelled "Awesome", mate. xD

 

[Pinkaap]

I still haven't told anyone in real life that I'm a furry yelp

 

[Yakamaru]

I still haven't told anyone in real life that I'm a furry yelp

Unless you know how people will react, I'd recommend you don't.

 

[JustSomeDude84]

I still haven't told anyone in real life that I'm a furry yelp

I haven't either. Personally, I don't really care how others would react, but no one I personally know has shown an interest in it so I've never found it relevant to bring up. Kind of wish I did know someone like that though, it'd be a fun topic to discuss IRL.

 

[Fuzzylumkin]

Unless you know how people will react, I'd recommend you don't.

pfft fuck what people think... if they don't like it they can go kick rocks... be who you are, and don't hide who you are or apologize to anyone for who and what you are! If you want to dress up in a mascot costume and tell everyone you are a furry, do it, and be happy about it. There are far too many sheep in this world, be a wolf!

 

[Crimcyan]

I dont try to "come out as a furry" it just happens.
Fucking this time it was beacuse my older cousin wants to see what i draw all the time and i usually draw my fox or wolf, but i never said it was a furry just "something random I drew". But i guess she caught on beacuse she asked me today if i drew any more furries...

 

[Fuzzylumkin]

I dont try to "come out as a furry" it just happens.
Fucking this time it was beacuse my older cousin wants to see what i draw all the time and i usually draw my fox or wolf, but i never said it was a furry just "something random I drew". But i guess she caught on beacuse she asked me today if i drew any more furries...

id like to see some of your art

 

[Yakamaru]

pfft fuck what people think... if they don't like it they can go kick rocks... be who you are, and don't hide who you are or apologize to anyone for who and what you are! If you want to dress up in a mascot costume and tell everyone you are a furry, do it, and be happy about it. There are far too many sheep in this world, be a wolf!

Yes, because damn personal responsibility and accountability for your own actions, am I right? "I told my parents I am a Furry and now I got disowned and kicked out! They are the ones at fault here!". No, YOU are. For telling them something they do not need to know and probably didn't WANT to know. It's called consequences of your actions, and as an individual you kind of have to take responsibility for your own actions and words. No one else is responsible let alone accountable for YOUR actions. However, people are free to do whatever they want, and as such will have to take responsibility for it, whether they want to or not.

Be who you are without being up on other people's faces about it. Being a Furry is not a sexuality, religious belief, cult or any other form of important trait. Treat it like an interest at best. Don't talk about it with people who may not even give a shit, or in some cases, react negatively to it.

 

[Troj]

You should consistently strive to be considerate and polite with people, and treat them as you'd like to be treated. So, in addition to everything else, this means you should generally be mindful of not causing other people needless inconvenience, irritation, or suffering.

But, if you've done everything you can do to be be appropriate, and someone still has a problem with you for reasons that have more to do with them than with you, then yeah, I'd say, "Fuck the haters" is an acceptable attitude to have.

Of course, if these "haters" just so happen to be your boss, your parents, or someone else you want or need to impress, appease, or keep happy, it may be prudent to alter your behavior accordingly.

 

[Yakamaru]

You should consistently strive to be considerate and polite with people, and treat them as you'd like to be treated. So, in addition to everything else, this means you should generally be mindful of not causing other people needless inconvenience, irritation, or suffering.

But, if you've done everything you can do to be be appropriate, and someone still has a problem with you for reasons that have more to do with them than with you, then yeah, I'd say, "Fuck the haters" is an acceptable attitude to have.

Of course, if these "haters" just so happen to be your boss, your parents, or someone else you want or need to impress, appease, or keep happy, it may be prudent to alter your behavior accordingly.

Have you ever considered changing your status to "Well-Known Anteater"?