Quick! Grab the object that is standing to the right of you! It will serve you as a weapon!

[Cyanomega]

An empty pack of Marlboro 100's.

Yeah, I'm gonna die.

 

[Kit H. Ruppell]

A full 22oz bottle of Guinness. Whip it at their head!

 

[TR273]

A BIBLE!!!

(Guess I better hope my opponent is a demon in need of an exorcism, or has a shockingly weak skull.)

 

[Minerva_Minx]

My PS4 controller! Have at thee, Bible thumper!

 

[TR273]

GameCube controller!

-Insert witty retort here-

 

[Leadhoof]

Since the super aggressive attack cockatiel is ignoring me, this kickass flyswatter will have to do.

 

[Guifrog]

A glass of water. STAY AWAY, YOU UGLY GROX.

 

[Rystren]

a 15Lb fire bottle. great for conkin' and blowin'

 

[Minerva_Minx]

A My Little Pony lamp.

*rips out electrical cord*

Electrical cord. Better.

 

[Ravofox]

Stay away, I've got a pair of briefs and I'm not afraid to wedgie ya with them!

 

[cerulean_blues]

Hah! I shall beat you about the head with my shiba inu mouse pad!

 

[Cyanomega]

A half full bottle of old Rasputin.
just hold still while I slowly drink this.....

 

[Arthurtheshepherd]

I swear to HECK if you come any closer i will hit you with a lego F-16!!!!

 

[Wabbajax]

*picks up M-Audio KeyRig49*
I dare you.

 

[Arthurtheshepherd]

Ill hit you with my flat cap
*aggressively whistles God Save the Queen*

 

[Arthurtheshepherd]

A full 22oz bottle of Guinness. Whip it at their head!

How did you get my dog in a bottle? And can i have him back?

 

[Captain TrashPanda]

*aggressively yeets a copy of the original Assassins Creed*

 

[Arthurtheshepherd]

Im going to hit you with my Minecraft poster if you get any closer

 

[Keefur]

*Douses you with an ice cold cup of Mountain Dew... then is sad because... Mountain Dew!" Why couldn't it have just been water?!

 

[DarkoKavinsky]

I feel good about this.

 

[Arthurtheshepherd]

View attachment 72271
I feel good about this.

That works to i guess

 

[Rystren]

View attachment 72271
I feel good about this.

I think I got you beat there. *stares at computer system next to me* very beat

 

[DarkoKavinsky]

I think I got you beat there. *stares at computer system next to me* very beat

 

[Rystren]

Much longer range. Over the horizon.

 

[foussiremix]

You won´t stand a chance against my nintendo switch.