Quick! Grab the object that is standing to the right of you! It will serve you as a weapon!

[BubbaDuckChanchi]

NO! Not my favorite coffee cup!

 

[Kit H. Ruppell]

$420 in cash.
Ayyyyyy!

 

[Captain TrashPanda]

A cup of coke
You’re gonna he sticky after I’m done with you
that’s what she said

 

[Ace412]

My helmet.....this gon hurt

 

[Marius Merganser]

A clear plastic spoon.
En garde!

 

[Asassinator]

A big whale plushie!

You can't attack an innocent doggo with a whale plushie, riiiight?

 

[Izzy4895]

I am armed with a copy of Dead Souls by Nikolai Gogol.

 

[Kit H. Ruppell]

A Nintendo 3DS XL. Pokemon battle?

 

[hara-surya]

CH Products Fighterstick. It's shaped like the F-16C's sidestick controller.

Welp, that's kind of what it's designed for. I've killed quite a few ground targets with it. It's fun to roll in with a bunch of CBU-99 Rockeyes and drop a stick on a column of trucks.

 

[Guifrog]

An AC adapter. Well it's quite solid, maybe drop it on the toe of my enemy

 

[Foxy Emy]

A Christmas tree! *Poke*

 

[Borophagus Metropolis]

I force you to drink my can of pale ale.

Now I have to get another beer.

 

[Keefur]

SPOOOOOON! *Holds up spoon in paw over his head*

 

[Borophagus Metropolis]

SPOOOOOON! *Holds up spoon in paw over his head*

Silly cat. You are not The Tick.

I have a pit bull to my right, but I am not going to grab her to use as a weapon. She is snoring.

 

[Keefur]

Silly cat. You are not The Tick.

I have a pit bull to my right, but I am not going to grab her to use as a weapon. She is snoring.

Just TRY to take my spoon!

 

[Axel_is_Crafty]

A figurine of a bowtruckle I got from Warner Brothers Studios in London.

 

[Kit H. Ruppell]

A full bottle of windshield washer. Am I supposed to force the opponent to chug it?

 

[DRGN Juno]

I have a budgie, and I'm not afraid to use her.

 

[Telnac]

My mate @Tayoria is a living weapon.

 

[TR273]

Literally my phone...

*Pings Queen Skittles to Floof my enemies.*

 

[Captain TrashPanda]

I will bludgeon your ass with my old Yamaha keyboard

 

[Skittles]

Literally my phone...

*Pings Queen Skittles to Floof my enemies.*

-Floofs them real good before pounding on them with an office chair!- (I have set up a dual desktop arrangement with @Silvear after all xP)

 

[Leadhoof]

You guys don't stand a chance.

 

[PercyD]

I am sitting next to a teddy bear that is older than I am--

This thing is old enough to be sentient and fight on my behalf.

 

[Kit H. Ruppell]

A ballpoint pen. Not actually mightier than the sword in this situation, but it'll put an eye out for sure.