Tell a bad joke

[theawakening]

Why did I wear sunglasses?
So the sun doesn't burn you.

 

[Guifrog]

I quit my job after what the boss said to me. What did he say? "You're fired".

 

[TimFox]

One day I went to far...

What happened?

I missed my stop.

 

[Skychickens]

Guess what?

Spoiler

Chicken Butt

 

[Scales42]

What do you call a magic dog?

Labracadabrador

 

[Guifrog]

What do you call a magic kebab.

Abakebabra. (stole that from some image in the pics thread)

 

[ChapterAquila92]

 

[ChapterAquila92]

 

[Xaroin]

A man walks into a bar.
ow

 

[Chaosmasterdelta]

Where does god go to watch porn?

Hollywood

 

[Kit H. Ruppell]

A blonde is on a trivia game show. The next question is "Which is further, the Moon or Florida?"
"Florida, obviously", she says with certainty. "You can SEE the Moon!"

 

[TimFox]

What did the fox say?

Well...

He just asked what did the fox say.

 

[CertifiedCervine]

Interviewer: Describe yourself in one word
Me:Hired

 

[TimFox]

^ That's actually a good one xD

 

[Littlefoot505]

What do you call a blind dinosaur?

Do-you-think-he-saur-us

 

[Rystren]

A man walks into a bar. He woke up several minutes later with a killer headache.

 

[Keefur]

Interviewer: Describe yourself in one word
Me:Hired

I have to vent here... My boss is a real jerk. He curses at me all the time and calls me horrible names. I always get the worst jobs to do. I constantly have to work nights, weekends, and lots of holidays with no set schedule. with no extra pay, and sometimes without any pay at all. He fires me on almost a daily basis, but hires me back because no one else will work for him. I have also NEVER gotten a promotion or a good job review... and sometimes... he touches me inappropriately.






Yes... I'm self-employed.

 

[Xitheon]

I went to a zoo.
There was only one animal: a dog.
It was a Shih Tzu...

 

[Jackpot Raccuki]

Me actually being a social happy being.

 

[Chaosmasterdelta]

"Knock knock"
"Who's there?"
"The delivery guy bringing you the package you ordered."
"Ok. Thanks."

Thats it. Not every knock at the door has to be funny.

 

[Keefur]

Q: How many foxes does it take to change a light bulb?

A: Foxes can't change light bulbs. There isn't a fox in the WORLD that knows how to UNscrew.

 

[David Drake]

Three ducks walk into a bar.

Thet get up to the stools and the barkeep serves the first one and asks "What's your name?"

"I'm Huey!"

"And how are you today?"

"Oh I'm great! I've been in and out of Puddles all day and I just feel great!"

Then he goes to the second duck. "And who are you?"

"I'm Dewy!"

"And how are you today?"

"Oh I'm great! Been in and out of Puddles all day and I'm just fantastic!"

Barkeep goes to the third duck. "Lemmie guess - your name is Louie, right?"

"No. I'm Puddles. Don't ask."

 

[Toby_Morpheus]

Fallout 76

*snort*

 

[HistoricalyIncorrect]

 

[TR273]

So an Englishman an Irishman and a Scotsman walk into a bar, the barman looks up and says;
"What is this, some kind of joke?"