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Telling my parents

Besharia

Member
"Mom, dad; I like sexualized animals. I jerk off to them"

Maybe cause I was already pre-disposed to... Not standard ideas? And my mom is just used to my odd personality... I told my family and they just shrugged their shoulders as if to say who gives a shit and went on with their day. I was actually the one who was pissed cause I was trying to start a argument and they just ignored me.
 

Shadowblackwolf

The really tired one....
I never told my parents. And though it can be a bit of a pain sometimes, I never told any girl that I've ever dated either, and I lived with one for a while.
Call it a double life, but it's just not something I feel should be made public.
It's nobody's business but my own. In fact, Only two people in the world who actually know me offlline know that I'm a furry artist as well.
One is my roommate. He doesn't care. He never did. Only reason he knows is he's seen my drawing pad. (which I sometimes fall asleep on.)
The other is a buddy of mine from the Marines. He's also a furry (there's a lot of furries in military by the way. don't ask me why.)
I don't hide my drawing pads, but I don't display them for any schmuck that happens to be in my house to get a hold of.
I just don't see the need to call attention to it. Parents are tricky things, especially when you still live in their house, and their rules.
I guess it's your endgame that matters. What do you hope to get out of telling them? Or do you just have the "urge to confess?"
 
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um_pineapplez

Mage of Void, dammit.
I never told my parents. And though it can be a bit of a pain sometimes, I never told any girl that I've ever dated either, and I lived with one for a while.
Call it a double life, but it's just not something I feel should be made public.
It's nobody's business but my own. In fact, Only two people in the world who actually know me offlline know that I'm a furry artist as well.
One is my roommate. He doesn't care. He never did. Only reason he knows is he's seen my drawing pad. (which I sometimes fall asleep on.)
The other is a buddy of mine from the Marines. He's also a furry (there's a lot of furries in military by the way. don't ask me why.)
I don't hide my drawing pads, but I don't display them for any schmuck that happens to be in my house to get a hold of.
I just don't see the need to call attention to it. Parents are tricky things, especially when you still live in their house, and their rules.
I guess it's your endgame that matters. What do you hope to get out of telling them? Or do you just have the "urge to confess?"
I guess it's more or less the fact that I don't like keeping secrets.
 

quoting_mungo

Well-Known Member
I guess it's more or less the fact that I don't like keeping secrets.
A thing to remember is that "keeping secrets" and "not bringing something up" are two different things. I'm sure there's plenty of things I've never told my parents, that I wouldn't lie about if asked, it's simply not come up.

Practically anything will sound worse than it is if you make a huge deal out of divulging it. By setting up expectations for people to freak out, you're sending them signals that "this is something TO freak out about".
 

SolDirix

Pixel fuzz
Practically anything will sound worse than it is if you make a huge deal out of divulging it. By setting up expectations for people to freak out, you're sending them signals that "this is something TO freak out about".

This X infinity.

The reason anyone gets a bad idea out of the fandom is that everyone makes it out to be controversial when first describing or mentioning it. Nothing is more convincing (and brainwashing), than controversy.
 

TidesofFate

Your friendly neighborhood Executioner
A thing to remember is that "keeping secrets" and "not bringing something up" are two different things. I'm sure there's plenty of things I've never told my parents, that I wouldn't lie about if asked, it's simply not come up.

Practically anything will sound worse than it is if you make a huge deal out of divulging it. By setting up expectations for people to freak out, you're sending them signals that "this is something TO freak out about".
That's exactly what I was thinking.
 

Rin

Here I am the real me.
my advice. Just dont. There is too much stigma about this community, and theres no point trying to make people understand it. If you really feel strongly about it, talk to your therapist first. Theres no way they will say its a problem if they're any good at their job, and they cant tell anyone because of their confidence agreements.
 

Troj

Your Friendly Neighborhood Dino Therapist
Quoting Mungo is exactly right.

There is a difference between telling a lie and maintaining your privacy. There is a difference between neurotically trying to hide an elephant in the room and simply not sharing something because it's not helpful or relevant.

Take a cue from the countless fandoms who don't treat their hobby or interest like a shameful skeleton in the closet.

Granted, some furs do have some reason to be anxious, given that even people who don't know much about the fandom have often heard or seen some negative things about it. Even people I know who aren't geeky or fandom-savvy have at least seen "that episode" of Tyra Banks or CSI.
 

zorua

diet soda
I really have to agree with @TidesofFate. It's not like you're telling them about some big sacrilegious part of you, it's just an interest. I guess if you WANT them to know, that's fine, but more or less I see it as not that important. I guess it depends on how much you tell your parents. Do you explain to them every time you have a new interest in a cartoon, webcomic, video game, etc?

In the end most people are about as interested in someone being into furry fandom as they are with any of those things. You don't "owe" anyone to know your interests. It's not like furry is a lifetime thing like being gay or trans, there's no need to come out.

As an adult I can safely say that people think about furries that they are people who dress in animal costumes to party or especially have sex. I can also say that in my experience just being into certain art doesn't make you that.
 

um_pineapplez

Mage of Void, dammit.
Do you explain to them every time you have a new interest in a cartoon, webcomic, video game, etc?
Yes. I told them when I got into Homestuck. I told them when I got into Zootopia (whilst not mentioning the furry thing.) I told them when I got into Animal Crossing.
 

um_pineapplez

Mage of Void, dammit.
Sounds like oversharing to me then.
Well, it's not like I could hide the fact that I got the movie from them, as well as the fact that one of 'em was there when I bought Animal Crossing. And Homestuck doesn't seem like a topic that's bad to talk about.
 

Troj

Your Friendly Neighborhood Dino Therapist
Reality check: Most of the people I know have zero qualms about the movies they've seen, the shows they've watched, the sweaters and scarves they've knitted, the deer and other animals they've shot and field-dressed, the sports they've played, the sports they've watched, the video games they've played, what their livestock are up to, what their kids are up to, and where they went over the weekend.

I don't buy that a person is automatically committing a heinous social offense if they share their interests to an equal degree. Anyone who shares their interests but freaks out when you mention yours to the same degree and in the same manner is being inconsiderate.
 

Voresh

Member
I don't see why you have to tell them that bad. If you do, just tell them you're part of a fandom that appreciates anthropomorphic characters (explaining what that is of course), show some SFW pictures and be like yeah that's it, just wanted you to know. If they ask about the mild porn image, just tell them you stumbled across it by accident and that rule 34 exists...
 

Rigby

Diaperfurs 4 Lyfe
"Yes mom, YES DAD, I touch myself to pictures of animals!" How do you expect that sort of conversation to go? If you wanna subject yourself to the humiliation, go for it. It's just totally pointless though.

If you wanna stop hiding your "PG rated" furry interests, then you don't need to have an intervention with your parents. Just be yourself and they'll get the picture. They already caught you watching cartoon animals go down on each other, and congrats! They didn't disown you! I've been there and you're incredibly lucky, don't push it. It'll only freak them out if you come up to them bearing your soul about your passion for animal people.

And for FOX-SAKE, don't rush to close everything when they come in your room or w/e, especially if it's completely innocent. You're making them think you're looking at porn.
 

Yakamaru

Cyberpunk musta Susi
I've said this before, but:

Privacy. No point sharing what doesn't need sharing, nor should be shared.

And for FOX-SAKE, don't rush to close everything when they come in your room or w/e, especially if it's completely innocent. You're making them think you're looking at porn.
Porn would be easier to explain though. :p
 

Sergei Nóhomo

Spicey Memes
Banned
I've said this before, but:

Privacy. No point sharing what doesn't need sharing, nor should be shared.


Porn would be easier to explain though. :p

I dunno back when I was younger I normally just had a game running in the background
 

Yakamaru

Cyberpunk musta Susi
I dunno back when I was younger I normally just had a game running in the background
Heh. I didn't give a shit back then. Told'em to fuck off and let me finish beating Junior. I still don't give a shit. But now I can make sure people come in on MY whim, and not theirs. :p

Own apartment ftw.
 

TidesofFate

Your friendly neighborhood Executioner
It's not like I tell me parents every time a sex scene occurs in a novel or show I was watching(it's not often, but sometimes it does). Unless it's actually important for your parents to know, such as if it's school or work related, then yeah sure.
 

um_pineapplez

Mage of Void, dammit.
I understand all o' that, but my parents are.....not very open to gays and lesbians. If I showed them any of the stuff I've found, they'd probably be nervous about me being in a fandom that's mostly homosexuals.
 

FoxInTheCloset

The Over Caffeinated Vulpine
I understand all o' that, but my parents are.....not very open to gays and lesbians. If I showed them any of the stuff I've found, they'd probably be nervous about me being in a fandom that's mostly homosexuals.
I have a solution!
Dont show them gay furry porn. Or any.
10/10 Solution. Everyone wins.
 
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