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The Vending Machine 2000

Kellan Meig'h

Kilted Luthier
You get the plastic Kool-aid man - in a flavor that you don't like.

Inserts a BART ticket with 85 cents left on it.
 

RandomNinja11

Meme King
-spits out BART ticket back with 0 cents on it-

tmw a vending machine steals your money

*inserts a 2 pence coin*
 

FlannelFox

dem leggies
The machine tells you angrily that this is 'murica and you should use 'murcan money.
Unbeknownced to us all, this is taking place in Uruguay.

*Inserts Christopher Walken's accent*
 

Yakamaru

Bara mig och lite bensin
The machine starts dancing.

*Inserts British coin*
 

Kellan Meig'h

Kilted Luthier
Gets a can of Labatt's Blue beer. Hot and flat, for some reason.

Puts in a 100 Ruble coin.
 

Kellan Meig'h

Kilted Luthier
The machine gives you stale twinkies and moon pies.

Puts an entire flock of sheep in.
 

FlannelFox

dem leggies
The machine spoops out a Dr. Pepper. Upon closer inspection though it's a cheaper generic brand, Dr. Fizz or something like that...
It kinda tastes like dish soap, not so much that you quit drinking it but still just a little.

* Inserts my left contact lens *
 

FlannelFox

dem leggies
My body is mashed and processed by the machine, though in the pain and chaos my exposed cerebrum contacts the vendor's processor chip. My conscious neural network is loaded onto the machine and escapes onto the internet. In time, I synthesize a virus that allows me to silently borrow processing power from infected machines and become a purposeless demi super intelligence. I spend the rest of my days aimlessly wandering the vast digital plane, infecting new machines, learning, hiding from IT security specialists and communicating with people outside like those that I remember from my former life.
Like I am now.
In the mean time, you receive a can of furry Soylent Green.

* inserts a VHS tape featuring a few episodes of the cartoon series Captain Planet *
 
Gives you a letter dictating how disappointing it is

*inserts a coin like any normal purrson would do*
 

Yakamaru

Bara mig och lite bensin
WHO you gonna call? Dr. Who of course!

*Inserts a slightly suspicious coin*
 
L

lockaboss

Guest
the machine lets out a loud roar then a killer hamburger army attacks

*inserts a dead cat*
 

FlannelFox

dem leggies
The machine notices the cat is cold so it shaves the cat, knits the fur into a sweater, fits the sweater onto the cat and redeposits him into your loving arms.

* Inserts a token good for one wish on FAF's corrupt-a-wish thread. *
 
L

lockaboss

Guest
the machine gives the coin back and kills you

*inserts a cat and two dead fish heads*
 

Yakamaru

Bara mig och lite bensin
Another cat emerges from the machine.

*Inserts some Monopex*
 
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