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Vent Thread

TyraWadman

TyraWadman

The Brutally Honest Man-Child
PhoxSpark said:
Well... My dad is divorcing... Again.

I live with my father and he's been on a relation with my now future ex-stepmom for like 9 years. I've never get along with her, but we learned to tolerate ourselves with the years. She always had the last word and all of his problems were worse than whatever I had to say, I really hated her sometimes.

This Thursday early (6-7AM), I was waken up by a very heated up argument downstairs. Didn't listen to what they were saying, but that morning I asked my dad "what happened?" at which he answered me "just clarifying things". The next days, they were calling lawyers and getting ready for the divorce, and I don't even know why!

To be fair, I hoped for their rupture in the past... But with their real rupture on the horizon, suddenly there will be a lot of people that I will never see again... All my stepbrothers and their relates will be out of my life forever and that just makes me really sad. I know I could still maintain contact with them, but I'm too different from them and I know for a fact that with time, even if I try to be in contact (and knowing the way I am), our relation will just fade...

And then, there is my dad. My dad is a "I don't have feelings" kind of boomer. But I know he have them. When I saw him around the house these days, he acts like if nothing is happening, but lately I barely see him on the house, he just eats and goes to work/bed. I can tell he's not having a good time with all of this and I cannot imagine what made him take this decision.

I was a bit "I don't careish", but I feel like it's really affecting me. I'm having real nightmares, I think slower than usual, I almost don't go out of my room and I have a sensation of sadness over my shoulders all the time... And I can't do anything about it! I'm nobody to speak over who my father should love, and I will respect always his choose.

And lastly, suddenly we will turn from a picturesque alternative family (with my stepbrother and stepsister living here) to an empty big house for just me and my father. I feel bad for feeling like this is bad, but I'm a bit scared of that future scenario. I love my dad and I don't want him to feel bad or heartbroken, but I'm very worried of what he can turn into within some months single... His character will change for sure and I fear it changes for worse.

Anyway, I just needed to throw up this out of my head.
Click to expand...

Things might seem rough right now but that doesn't mean it will always be like this.
Emptying a house also means there will be opportunities to fill it again.

I know it's not fair to ask of you when the moment is still fresh, but try to be strong. I'm not saying you need to be a therapist to your dad, or bend over backwards for him, but try to show subtle ways to say 'I'm still here and I care about you' that doesn't directly tread onto his 'emotionless boomerisms'. Like prepping his morning beverage or something like that, surprising him, small stuff like that. I'm mostly saying this not to dismiss your own wants/needs but because there's a good chance this stubborn man is gonna need it, and this is assuming you're on good/desirable terms with him. If not, and he is despicable, then of course just ignore what I said.

If you ever wanna vent to someone about a dysfunctional family/divorce, I don't mind reading!
 
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Hi-FiWolf95 said:
Lot of pain in damaged wisdom teeth also causing soreness, in teeth, in jaw, salivary glands, and referred pain up to sides of head.
Click to expand...
Wisdom teeth suckn*From what I heard*

I have one coming in actually! Im a big boy. But, yeah *Hugs* Sorry you're not doing so well.
 
Nexus Cabler

Nexus Cabler

\ ( :v ) /
Just wanted to say my tooth ache is gone now, thanks to this antibiotic I got.

I hope everyone else here finds helpful solutions to their current issues in life right now, whatever they are.
 
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Nexus Cabler said:
Just wanted to say my tooth ache is gone now, thanks to this antibiotic I got.

I hope everyone else here finds helpful solutions to their current issues in life right now, whatever they are.
Click to expand...
Thats good :3

but go to dentist >:3
 
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
quoting_mungo

quoting_mungo

Well-Known Member
So frustrating.

I don't particularly like going to the doctor in the first place. I will if I need to, but I'd rather not.
I have been actively avoiding/postponing seeing a doctor for most issues during the pandemic. Because, yanno, pandemic. Don't want to take up doctors' time when people are sick; don't want to hang out in places where people go when they're sick; would like to avoid seeing people whose job it is to see sick people all day; would prefer the option of being able to bring boyfriend.

So of course an issue I've been trying to manage on my own until after I can get my COVID shots (opening to ages 45+ in my region, now, who knows when they'll be down to 36), has flared up to where it's just not tenable to wait. At least it's after health care workers got their shots, so that's better than nothing, but ARGH! Can my damn body not wait another few months after waiting this long?
 
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
quoting_mungo said:
So frustrating.

I don't particularly like going to the doctor in the first place. I will if I need to, but I'd rather not.
I have been actively avoiding/postponing seeing a doctor for most issues during the pandemic. Because, yanno, pandemic. Don't want to take up doctors' time when people are sick; don't want to hang out in places where people go when they're sick; would like to avoid seeing people whose job it is to see sick people all day; would prefer the option of being able to bring boyfriend.

So of course an issue I've been trying to manage on my own until after I can get my COVID shots (opening to ages 45+ in my region, now, who knows when they'll be down to 36), has flared up to where it's just not tenable to wait. At least it's after health care workers got their shots, so that's better than nothing, but ARGH! Can my damn body not wait another few months after waiting this long?
Click to expand...
Your health is something that is very important as well as comfort, if existing is bad enough to the point where you can't do either you should go see professionals. While yes, there are risks involved getting yourself taken care of is very important. And there are things to do to decrease the likelihood of getting it. Wearing masks, social distancing, Hell when I went to the hospital I took a shower just to be sure. Gotta take care of yourself, even if it doesn't seem like fun.
 
PhoxSpark

PhoxSpark

Well-Known Member
TyraWadman said:
Things might seem rough right now but that doesn't mean it will always be like this.
Emptying a house also means there will be opportunities to fill it again.

I know it's not fair to ask of you when the moment is still fresh, but try to be strong. I'm not saying you need to be a therapist to your dad, or bend over backwards for him, but try to show subtle ways to say 'I'm still here and I care about you' that doesn't directly tread onto his 'emotionless boomerisms'. Like prepping his morning beverage or something like that, surprising him, small stuff like that. I'm mostly saying this not to dismiss your own wants/needs but because there's a good chance this stubborn man is gonna need it, and this is assuming you're on good/desirable terms with him. If not, and he is despicable, then of course just ignore what I said.

If you ever wanna vent to someone about a dysfunctional family/divorce, I don't mind reading!
Click to expand...
Today I've talked to my father while eating and I feel a lot better. He told me his reasons and I understand a bit more his decision. He obviously don't like the situation, but he feels like it will be better in the end and I respect his decision. Also I offered myself for anything I could do to help, so he don't have to care for the house (or any other kind of trouble) by himself.
Thank you for your words, they really helped a lot.

lenago said:
*gives you a strong hug*
Very sorry to hear that buddy, i hope things turn out good in the end
Click to expand...
ssaannttoo said:
Im so sorry about all of that, while Im lucky yo never have gone through a divorce with my parents, I can understand the strain you'd be on. And while its unfair that it is forced upon you because of two adults. But you can get through this. A large change in your life is always hard, but just like any other it becomes easier with time.

*Hugs you tightly*

Im always here to talk with you if you'd like dear. We gotta take care of one another.
Click to expand...
I'll hug all of you! Thank you for reading my dramas, I'm feeling a lot better. I actually think that things can turn good in the end. I'm still sad for the situation but I'll for sure move along from this.
 
Lenago

Lenago

Top hatted fox
PhoxSpark said:
Today I've talked to my father while eating and I feel a lot better. He told me his reasons and I understand a bit more his decision. He obviously don't like the situation, but he feels like it will be better in the end and I respect his decision. Also I offered myself for anything I could do to help, so he don't have to care for the house (or any other kind of trouble) by himself.
Thank you for your words, they really helped a lot.



I'll hug all of you! Thank you for reading my dramas, I'm feeling a lot better. I actually think that things can turn good in the end. I'm still sad for the situation but I'll for sure move along from this.
Click to expand...
Anytime pal.
Never lose heart, and keep up hope that things will get better in the end
Hang in there bud
 
quoting_mungo

quoting_mungo

Well-Known Member
ssaannttoo said:
Your health is something that is very important as well as comfort, if existing is bad enough to the point where you can't do either you should go see professionals. While yes, there are risks involved getting yourself taken care of is very important. And there are things to do to decrease the likelihood of getting it. Wearing masks, social distancing, Hell when I went to the hospital I took a shower just to be sure. Gotta take care of yourself, even if it doesn't seem like fun.
Click to expand...
Oh, absolutely. I went today (lucky timing!) and the doctor wrote a script (well, hopefully, pharmacy hadn’t received it when I went in so I may have to check back on that one if it doesn’t come in by tomorrow morning), so that’ll hopefully take care of the issue. I’m just miffed that it got worse so that I couldn’t wait until I’ve had my shots.

(Boyfriend and I have been very cautious, in part in response to seeing how many people aren’t cautious at all, so any in-person interaction becomes a risk assessment. We’re also down to doing groceries every 1.5-2 weeks most of the time.)
 
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
quoting_mungo said:
Oh, absolutely. I went today (lucky timing!) and the doctor wrote a script (well, hopefully, pharmacy hadn’t received it when I went in so I may have to check back on that one if it doesn’t come in by tomorrow morning), so that’ll hopefully take care of the issue. I’m just miffed that it got worse so that I couldn’t wait until I’ve had my shots.

(Boyfriend and I have been very cautious, in part in response to seeing how many people aren’t cautious at all, so any in-person interaction becomes a risk assessment. We’re also down to doing groceries every 1.5-2 weeks most of the time.)
Click to expand...
I see, we've been very cut off as well (Luckily we're vaccinated) But still gotta make sure everything is working properly.
 
ssaannttoo

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
The_biscuits_532 said:
AAAAAAA I CAN'T TAKE THE HEAT ANYMORE I HATE SUMMER BRING BACK WINTER

MY PHONE SAYS IT'S ONLY 23°C WTF

I JUST WANNA GO BACK TO THE -10-10 RANGE WE GOT THROUGH WINTER
Click to expand...
*Sighs before blowing on you as well*
 
Tendo64

Tendo64

Cat With A Guitar
I'm gonna use this thread again because most of my friends are cis/straight and my age, and I feel like I could benefit from getting advice from other LGBT individuals with more life experience than me.

It's only recently occurred to me that I will likely be disowned by the majority of my family once they find out I'm trans if I end up pursuing medical transition (my family is extremely conservative and not LGBT-friendly, DEFINITELY not trans-friendly), and it's a really depressing and frightening thought. I'll be on my own with possibly nobody to help me, maybe even with no warning if i'm outed rather than me choosing to come out myself. What exactly do I do in situations such as this? Should I avoid being close with my family so the day I have to say goodbye hurts less? Are there any recommendations on what I should prepare for or where I should go when that time comes?
 
J

JacobFloofWoof

Guest
My entire life feels like a genuine punishment, always something knocking the smile off my face.
 
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