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Vent Thread

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I broke up with somebody in the past. Somebody who I still greatly adore because of how kind they are to other people, because of how sweet their personality is. I broke up with them because I couldn't handle the relationship. Because of outside reasons that were constantly on my mind, it was best that I leave. But in that leaving I caused pain. Pain to myself, but most importantly pain to my partner. This makes me feel sick, this is the reason I hate myself, is because I hurt people I love and care for. How can I be like this? Why cant I be better for them. Why couldn't I just deal with the pain I was in, so they didn't have to feel any.
And now our friendship is in the balance. I think they might hate me. Whenever I message I get short responses back, and it just feels as if they want to get away from me. And, while I deserve it it hurts me to my core. That somebody as genuinely amazing as them doesnt want to be with me, doesnt even want to see my face. It makes me feel like worthless trash, because I did this, and im too stupid to figure out a way to fix this. I am a failure, in more ways that just relationships (Though I've fucked almost all of those royally). I just wish I could become better to make the people around me genuinely happy, to not cause hurt or pain. sometimes it just feels like it would be better if I weren't here. Again, I am sorry for my absence, i want to be here but just other things on my mind, not having the energy. I'll be more present. Though, I dont know how I will be able to do much. I want to help y'al whenever I can, to be there for all of your needs. But I've been failing at that as well.
 
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Attaman

"I say we forget this business and run."
I must say it is rather frustrating seeing a smart, talented person get hounded to hell and back by their ex- and said ex-'s group of friends. It's bad enough seeing them actively - continuously - be gaslit by this group, their perspective and recollection of their relationship constantly called into question by using the mental trauma inflicted against them as evidence of why they can't be trusted. But it's even worse seeing the ex- and company actively crowdsource efforts to harass them, manipulation by the ex-'s friends to scum up information by pretending to still be their friend specifically so as to feed information back to the ex- to use against them / further hammer home the trauma, knowing that the person was milked for oh so may things (time, emotional support, money, content) whilst actively being thrown under the bus behind closed doors... To say nothing of the more... intimate, abuses of trust.

What I'm saying is the FK situation is fucked up and I sure am glad it seems to be one of a kind.
 

Miles Marsalis

The Last DJ.
I broke up with somebody in the past. Somebody who I still greatly adore because of how kind they are to other people, because of how sweet their personality is. I broke up with them because I couldn't handle the relationship. Because of outside reasons that were constantly on my mind, it was best that I leave. But in that leaving I caused pain. Pain to myself, but most importantly pain to my partner. This makes me feel sick, this is the reason I hate myself, is because I hurt people I love and care for. How can I be like this? Why cant I be better for them. Why couldn't I just deal with the pain I was in, so they didn't have to feel any.
And now our friendship is in the balance. I think they might hate me. Whenever I message I get short responses back, and it just feels as if they want to get away from me. And, while I deserve it it hurts me to my core. That somebody as genuinely amazing as them doesnt want to be with me, doesnt even want to see my face. It makes me feel like worthless trash, because I did this, and im too stupid to figure out a way to fix this. I am a failure, in more ways that just relationships (Though I've fucked almost all of those royally). I just wish I could become better to make the people around me genuinely happy, to not cause hurt or pain. sometimes it just feels like it would be better if I weren't here. Again, I am sorry for my absence, i want to be here but just other things on my mind, not having the energy. I'll be more present. Though, I dont know how I will be able to do much. I want to help y'al whenever I can, to be there for all of your needs. But I've been failing at that as well.
I mean, how they feel about you has no bearing on your worth as a person and from what I've seen seen you're a pretty exceptional individual, so it's their loss.

It's nice that you still want to maintain a friendship with your ex, but you need ask yourself if they don't seem to not care about you as much as you care them and don't seem to want to keep in contact, is it really worth it and is this really someone you want in your life? You definitely have friends here who do want to spend time with you and appreciate you, so it might be better to be around them (or us, since we're friends) then with someone you feel wants to get away from you.

Ultimately, maybe this person might come around, maybe not. But you're still appreciated and you've fam here, so don't sweat it.
 
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ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I mean, how they feel about you has no bearing on worth as a person and from what I've seen seen you're a pretty exceptional individual, so it's their loss.

It's nice that you still want to maintain a friendship with your ex, but you need ask yourself if they don't seem to not care about you as much as you care them and don't seem to want to keep in contact, is it really worth it and is this really someone you want in your life? You definitely have friends here who do want to spend time with you and appreciate you, so it might be better to be around them (or us, since we're friends) then with someone you feel wants to get away from you.

Ultimately, maybe this person might come around, maybe not. But you're still appreciated and you've fam here, so don't sweat it.
Thank you
 

Firuthi Dragovic

Gamer Dragon, former speedrunner
Spiders do quite a bit to keep the insect populations reasonable around here.

Try telling this to my father, who instead of asking what it is, reacts to EVERY spider with a worryingly calm "swat it dead" attitude.

The only spiders around where I am now that I'd even consider swatting are the yellow sac spider and the (fairly rare for this region I believe) black widow spider, and that's because their bites are harmful to people. The inch-diameter black spider he last swatted was neither of these.
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
My entire life I knew I wanted to be with somebody. Find that one person who will be my world and I theirs. I only had two serious relationships pre furry community. After I've joined I've had 4. The first is no longer on faf, the last three are. and I am in various relationships with the last three. But of all of them my second was the worst. At the end of it I stopped feeling happy with the relationship so I told him I was going to leave. That didn't go over well. there was a lot of anger and animosity towards me. At this time I was feeling a lot of self hatred because I got this person, (who was also a dom for me) who I hurt. So I told him to insult me, to tell me what he really thought of me. Because I was hurting and needed to be punished for being unhappy and unable to continue to be with him. I will show some of what he said, direct quotes but not everything he said because there are paragraphs of it over several days and many posts.

"You're just a useless slut that gets around." "You really are just an attention seeking whore" "You worthless useless slut why cant you just leave me alone after hurting me"

"Just bug off why don't ya? I ment eveything i said the less i interect with you the better,i tried to ignore you for a reason! At the very least respect me on that!"
"
Heh wow, exploring the forums, you DO get around dont ya?
Funny enough that kind of calms my anger over you a bit, kind of proves my point over you in a way. Thanks~"
"Still surprised by you really, i would think you would be more thoughfull"
"Just to let you know, do not think for a second the fact that we "talked" during the morning that my feelings have changed or any sign of frienship is there."

"If you had a problem say it "leave me alone" or anything! You were the one always talking to me in the main forums
Thank you for report Santo! If i didnt hate you, now i really do"
"What is your problem?"

For those who dont want to read it. There are pretty much insults that hit me commenting a lot on the forum, being here, trying to fix things with him, and him insulting me as a person who gets around. Many of which were him trying to get me to leave the forums, saying "ugg why do you have to be here, why cant you fuck off to discord and leave me be" These comments happened over days and weeks, multiple private message threads which ended up clogging my inbox. It hurts and I think is a big problem as to why I see myself the way I currently do. the fact I made somebody feel this way.. i felt disgusting. He still uses the forums, and seeing him scares me, that he will break and do it again, or he will tell people about the sexual things Im into or the things we did together. Im just afraid of getting abused again.

Im saying this because I want to move past this, its been holding onto me since April, and I want to move on to heal and become better. I dont want to be a helpless victim anymore. I wanna move on and grow and become stronger.
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I didn't realize how afraid I was until I started writing. My heart is thumping, fingers trembling and my palms are sweaty. But I want to get past this once and for all. So despite the fear of retaliation, or even loosing my account. I... I want to get better more than anything.
 

KimberVaile

Self congratulatory title goes here
My entire life I knew I wanted to be with somebody. Find that one person who will be my world and I theirs. I only had two serious relationships pre furry community. After I've joined I've had 4. The first is no longer on faf, the last three are. and I am in various relationships with the last three. But of all of them my second was the worst. At the end of it I stopped feeling happy with the relationship so I told him I was going to leave. That didn't go over well. there was a lot of anger and animosity towards me. At this time I was feeling a lot of self hatred because I got this person, (who was also a dom for me) who I hurt. So I told him to insult me, to tell me what he really thought of me. Because I was hurting and needed to be punished for being unhappy and unable to continue to be with him. I will show some of what he said, direct quotes but not everything he said because there are paragraphs of it over several days and many posts.

"You're just a useless slut that gets around." "You really are just an attention seeking whore" "You worthless useless slut why cant you just leave me alone after hurting me"

"Just bug off why don't ya? I ment eveything i said the less i interect with you the better,i tried to ignore you for a reason! At the very least respect me on that!"
"
Heh wow, exploring the forums, you DO get around dont ya?
Funny enough that kind of calms my anger over you a bit, kind of proves my point over you in a way. Thanks~"
"Still surprised by you really, i would think you would be more thoughfull"
"Just to let you know, do not think for a second the fact that we "talked" during the morning that my feelings have changed or any sign of frienship is there."

"If you had a problem say it "leave me alone" or anything! You were the one always talking to me in the main forums
Thank you for report Santo! If i didnt hate you, now i really do"
"What is your problem?"

For those who dont want to read it. There are pretty much insults that hit me commenting a lot on the forum, being here, trying to fix things with him, and him insulting me as a person who gets around. Many of which were him trying to get me to leave the forums, saying "ugg why do you have to be here, why cant you fuck off to discord and leave me be" These comments happened over days and weeks, multiple private message threads which ended up clogging my inbox. It hurts and I think is a big problem as to why I see myself the way I currently do. the fact I made somebody feel this way.. i felt disgusting. He still uses the forums, and seeing him scares me, that he will break and do it again, or he will tell people about the sexual things Im into or the things we did together. Im just afraid of getting abused again.

Im saying this because I want to move past this, its been holding onto me since April, and I want to move on to heal and become better. I dont want to be a helpless victim anymore. I wanna move on and grow and become stronger.
I'm sorry for that Ssaannttoo. If it helps any, my first ex said all manners of nasty things to me both during the break up and years later. Break ups are emotionally gut wrenching for both parties. Though, it never excuses verbal abuse. Especially to this magnitude. You're a sweet and considerate person, you shouldn't feel like you've failed anyone or that you are lesser for it. For both your sake and even your exes sake, you need to block each other. You will both be thankful for it, and it will help reduce the emotional trauma. After 6 months, you can try to connect again, but for now, just block each other and try to move on. The only thing that will mend these wounds for both of you is time. Nothing else at this moment is going to 'save the relationship' or make things better between you two. You need to take time for yourself, and you don't need to endure abuse. You're better than that and deserve better.

Believe me, I know how crushing it can be, to be cut down by somebody you care about, I'm sensitive and soft on the inside, as I've mentioned before. When my first ex started laying into me, I crumbled quick. There was very little I could do other than wanting to cry. Don't let him keep getting hits on you and degrade you. You deserve better than that and his awful attitude. You entrusted him with the core of your person and he betrayed that. There's no reason to continue to play his game.

Stay well and look after yourself first, Ssaannttoo.
 
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ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
I'm sorry for that Ssaannttoo. If it helps any, my first ex said all manners of nasty things to me both during the break up and years later. Break ups are emotionally gut wrenching for both parties. Though, it never excuses verbal abuse. Especially to this magnitude. You're a sweet and considerate person, you shouldn't feel like you've failed anyone or that you are lesser for it. For both you sake and even your exes sake, you need to block each other. You will both be thankful for it, and it will help reduce the emotional trauma. After 6 months, you can try to connect again, but for now, just block each other and try to move on. The only thing that will mend these wounds for both of you is time. Nothing else at this moment is going to 'save the relationship' or make things better between you two. You need to take time for yourself, and you don't need to endure abuse. You're better than that and deserve better.

Believe me, I know how crushing it can be, to be cut down by somebody you care about, I'm sensitive and soft on the inside, as I've mentioned before. When my first ex started laying into me, I crumbled quick. There was very little I could do other than wanting to cry. Don't let him keep getting hits on you and degrade you. You deserve better than that and his awful attitude. You entrusted him with the core of your person and he betrayed that. There's no reason to continue to play his game.

Stay well and look after yourself first, Ssaannttoo.
Thank you Kimber.
 

Erix

>‿‿◕
I didn't realize how afraid I was until I started writing. My heart is thumping, fingers trembling and my palms are sweaty. But I want to get past this once and for all. So despite the fear of retaliation, or even loosing my account. I... I want to get better more than anything.
That’s so courageous and strong of you Santo. Keep pushing forward dude, and don’t let these past experiences hold you hostage.

I’m not gonna speak as if I know anything about love cuz I don’t, and I wish I did so I could give you some good advice. I’m pissed that a dude would do something like that to you, and I feel very inclined to hate them, but I think at the end of the day they were just a person who was very upset by you leaving. Whether they got upset cuz they just loved you that much or was just deciding to be a petty asshole I’ll never know, but I do know this, you’re 100% better than anything that guy told you, better than all those insults and sleazy remarks, and all of us here know that for a fact.

Don’t sell yourself short and let yourself think otherwise.
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
That’s so courageous and strong of you Santo. Keep pushing forward dude, and don’t let these past experiences hold you hostage.

I’m not gonna speak as if I know anything about love cuz I don’t, and I wish I did so I could give you some good advice. I’m pissed that a dude would do something like that to you, and I feel very inclined to hate them, but I think at the end of the day they were just a person who was very upset by you leaving. Whether they got upset cuz they just loved you that much or was just deciding to be a petty asshole I’ll never know, but I do know this, you’re 100% better than anything that guy told you, better than all those insults and sleazy remarks, and all of us here know that for a fact.

Don’t sell yourself short and let yourself think otherwise.
Thank you Eric. You lovely goofball
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
and retaliation has already started. not by him, but by his friends who know. wanting me to take it down. i probably should, apparently it breaks the rules... i just want too heal
 

L.Rey

Lucas, the wanderer
These wonderful people have already beat me to saying certain things, and no doubt have even more lovely things to add, but I'll try to include my own words:

I know this wasn't easy for you, and that you've been dwelling on it for a while...but I'm proud of you for doing this. You took a stand on such a matter and made this move to help yourself moving forward. This takes courage and strength...which you clearly do have. You're better than what both of you think
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
These wonderful people have already beat me to saying certain things, and no doubt have even more lovely things to add, but I'll try to include my own words:

I know this wasn't easy for you, and that you've been dwelling on it for a while...but I'm proud of you for doing this. You took a stand on such a matter and made this move to help yourself moving forward. This takes courage and strength...which you clearly do have. You're better than what both of you think
Thank you.
 

Attaman

"I say we forget this business and run."
and retaliation has already started. not by him, but by his friends who know. wanting me to take it down. i probably should, apparently it breaks the rules... i just want too heal
Being entirely honest: Looking at several of the spoilered things? There be rule breaking alright, but it ain't from you. One of them looks like a direct attempt to coerce a forum user for dinging somebody in a report (which, in addition to both stalking and harassment, could be seen as a 3.1 violation. Particularly "or retaliate against other users over staff action."), while others are pretty open-and-shut examples of stalking a forum user.

I'm not particularly one to step in with forum relationship stuff (the last time I did it ended with me issuing a formal apology in a PM), but I will say:
1) I wish you the best, and am sorry to hear you've had to deal with even just the fragmented bits I've picked up from you thus far.
2) You may want to bring this matter up with staff yourself if this keeps coming up, as right now this looks a lot like a forum equivalent of "We hit you 'cause we love you".
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Being entirely honest: Looking at several of the spoilered things? There be rule breaking alright, but it ain't from you. One of them looks like a direct attempt to coerce a forum user for dinging somebody in a report (which, in addition to both stalking and harassment, could be seen as a 3.1 violation. Particularly "or retaliate against other users over staff action."), while others are pretty open-and-shut examples of stalking a forum user.

I'm not particularly one to step in with forum relationship stuff (the last time I did it ended with me issuing a formal apology in a PM), but I will say:
1) I wish you the best, and am sorry to hear you've had to deal with even just the fragmented bits I've picked up from you thus far.
2) You may want to bring this matter up with staff yourself if this keeps coming up, as right now this looks a lot like a forum equivalent of "We hit you 'cause we love you".
Thank you.
 

Sappho_Cortez

Canis Centaurus
I didn't realize how afraid I was until I started writing. My heart is thumping, fingers trembling and my palms are sweaty. But I want to get past this once and for all. So despite the fear of retaliation, or even loosing my account. I... I want to get better more than anything.
Santo, we'll always be here for you no matter what happens. You're part of our gigantic family and we'll always welcome you with open arms and love. You will overcome this, and you will one day find that one person who treats you like their whole world
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Santo, we'll always be here for you no matter what happens. You're part of our gigantic family and we'll always welcome you with open arms and love.
thank you taur fwen *hugs tightly*
 

Outré

(o͞o-trā′)
I broke up with somebody in the past. Somebody who I still greatly adore because of how kind they are to other people, because of how sweet their personality is. I broke up with them because I couldn't handle the relationship. Because of outside reasons that were constantly on my mind, it was best that I leave. But in that leaving I caused pain. Pain to myself, but most importantly pain to my partner. This makes me feel sick, this is the reason I hate myself, is because I hurt people I love and care for. How can I be like this? Why cant I be better for them. Why couldn't I just deal with the pain I was in, so they didn't have to feel any.
And now our friendship is in the balance. I think they might hate me. Whenever I message I get short responses back, and it just feels as if they want to get away from me. And, while I deserve it it hurts me to my core. That somebody as genuinely amazing as them doesnt want to be with me, doesnt even want to see my face. It makes me feel like worthless trash, because I did this, and im too stupid to figure out a way to fix this. I am a failure, in more ways that just relationships (Though I've fucked almost all of those royally). I just wish I could become better to make the people around me genuinely happy, to not cause hurt or pain. sometimes it just feels like it would be better if I weren't here. Again, I am sorry for my absence, i want to be here but just other things on my mind, not having the energy. I'll be more present. Though, I dont know how I will be able to do much. I want to help y'al whenever I can, to be there for all of your needs. But I've been failing at that as well.
It’s possible to be friends with someone you break up with, but it’s sometimes a good idea to completely step away from the situation for a while and give each other time to heal. I’m friends with both of my main 2 exes. One of them I really didn’t talk to for at least a year after we broke up. We tried to be friends right away but it didn’t work. The other one took closer to 4 years before we could be friends. I’m not super close with either of them though… they are both married now. But we talk.

Sorry your going through that, it sucks. You should never stay with somebody just to make them happy. Both people need to be happy or it will never be a super strong relationship. It can be tough even if you’re the person who had the end it.
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
t
It’s possible to be friends with someone you break up with, but it’s sometimes a good idea to completely step away from the situation for a while and give each other time to heal. I’m friends with both of my main 2 exes. One of them I really didn’t talk to for at least a year after we broke up. We tried to be friends right away but it didn’t work. The other one took closer to 4 years before we could be friends. I’m not super close with either of them though… they are both married now. But we talk.

Sorry your going through that, it sucks. You should never stay with somebody just to make them happy. Both people need to be happy or it will never be a super strong relationship. It can be tough even if you’re the person who had the end it.
Thank you *Hugs*
 

TyraWadman

The Brutally Honest Man-Child
My entire life I knew I wanted to be with somebody. Find that one person who will be my world and I theirs. I only had two serious relationships pre furry community. After I've joined I've had 4. The first is no longer on faf, the last three are. and I am in various relationships with the last three. But of all of them my second was the worst. At the end of it I stopped feeling happy with the relationship so I told him I was going to leave. That didn't go over well. there was a lot of anger and animosity towards me. At this time I was feeling a lot of self hatred because I got this person, (who was also a dom for me) who I hurt. So I told him to insult me, to tell me what he really thought of me. Because I was hurting and needed to be punished for being unhappy and unable to continue to be with him. I will show some of what he said, direct quotes but not everything he said because there are paragraphs of it over several days and many posts.

"You're just a useless slut that gets around." "You really are just an attention seeking whore" "You worthless useless slut why cant you just leave me alone after hurting me"

"Just bug off why don't ya? I ment eveything i said the less i interect with you the better,i tried to ignore you for a reason! At the very least respect me on that!"
"
Heh wow, exploring the forums, you DO get around dont ya?
Funny enough that kind of calms my anger over you a bit, kind of proves my point over you in a way. Thanks~"
"Still surprised by you really, i would think you would be more thoughfull"
"Just to let you know, do not think for a second the fact that we "talked" during the morning that my feelings have changed or any sign of frienship is there."

"If you had a problem say it "leave me alone" or anything! You were the one always talking to me in the main forums
Thank you for report Santo! If i didnt hate you, now i really do"
"What is your problem?"

For those who dont want to read it. There are pretty much insults that hit me commenting a lot on the forum, being here, trying to fix things with him, and him insulting me as a person who gets around. Many of which were him trying to get me to leave the forums, saying "ugg why do you have to be here, why cant you fuck off to discord and leave me be" These comments happened over days and weeks, multiple private message threads which ended up clogging my inbox. It hurts and I think is a big problem as to why I see myself the way I currently do. the fact I made somebody feel this way.. i felt disgusting. He still uses the forums, and seeing him scares me, that he will break and do it again, or he will tell people about the sexual things Im into or the things we did together. Im just afraid of getting abused again.

Im saying this because I want to move past this, its been holding onto me since April, and I want to move on to heal and become better. I dont want to be a helpless victim anymore. I wanna move on and grow and become stronger.

Honestly, it's reminiscent to one of my online exes. The insults, at least. A real dom wouldn't be out to hurt/kill you like this, and they'd know about this thing called 'aftercare'. It's one thing to be rough, but to try and manipulate you and discourage you from even existing in the same corner of the internet is what a lot of people call 'toxic'. The ignore button is there for a reason. They don't HAVE to be bothered by your posts, they CHOOSE to be. And there's nothing you can do to control that.

So do what is best for you, take a deep breath, block them on any/all socials you might have had them on, and do the same with any friends they try to send your way. Blocking someone that has said some really shitty things doesn't make you the 'loser' or 'weak'. If you keep inviting them in to talk and try to reason with someone that doesn't want to be helped, you will never be able to truly move on. You don't have to explain yourself.

The forum doesn't just belong to one person. If someone really wants to call you a 'slut who gets around' just because you know how to have fun and post often in a forum, they are clearly incapable of handling their own emotions. Again, not your fault. You shouldn't assume responsibility for their own suffering.

Emotions can be an overcomplicated and overwhelming thing. I've been there. I know what it's like to fall in love so easily and have my heart ripped out. I know what it's like to love someone that it hurts so bad, moreso knowing you'll never be the one to make them happy. I can tell you it does get easier with age. You are young (and I'm not saying that to be dismissive, I promise!). In order to learn you will have to make mistakes. As long as you keep learning and find a silver lining wherever you go, you will do great in life. Make that mistake again? Discipline yourself but NEVER shame yourself. Two very different things. Eventually, you'll hit your head hard enough and it'll stick!

I know a lot of this is easier said than done, so take some time to cool off and unwind. Just make sure you come out of this on top, aight?
 

Outré

(o͞o-trā′)
I can tell you it does get easier with age. You are young (and I'm not saying that to be dismissive, I promise!).
I think it gets easer with experience more so than with age... just my opinion though. I say that because I had no desier to start dating until I was in my 30's. Even though I was a bit older it wasn't easer. It was more just learning to deal with stuff. The first time you are truly hurt can be traumatizing at any age.

Probably better to learn those things at a younger age though. get past it.
 

ssaannttoo

Joy Boi
Honestly, it's reminiscent to one of my online exes. The insults, at least. A real dom wouldn't be out to hurt/kill you like this, and they'd know about this thing called 'aftercare'. It's one thing to be rough, but to try and manipulate you and discourage you from even existing in the same corner of the internet is what a lot of people call 'toxic'. The ignore button is there for a reason. They don't HAVE to be bothered by your posts, they CHOOSE to be. And there's nothing you can do to control that.

So do what is best for you, take a deep breath, block them on any/all socials you might have had them on, and do the same with any friends they try to send your way. Blocking someone that has said some really shitty things doesn't make you the 'loser' or 'weak'. If you keep inviting them in to talk and try to reason with someone that doesn't want to be helped, you will never be able to truly move on. You don't have to explain yourself.

The forum doesn't just belong to one person. If someone really wants to call you a 'slut who gets around' just because you know how to have fun and post often in a forum, they are clearly incapable of handling their own emotions. Again, not your fault. You shouldn't assume responsibility for their own suffering.

Emotions can be an overcomplicated and overwhelming thing. I've been there. I know what it's like to fall in love so easily and have my heart ripped out. I know what it's like to love someone that it hurts so bad, moreso knowing you'll never be the one to make them happy. I can tell you it does get easier with age. You are young (and I'm not saying that to be dismissive, I promise!). In order to learn you will have to make mistakes. As long as you keep learning and find a silver lining wherever you go, you will do great in life. Make that mistake again? Discipline yourself but NEVER shame yourself. Two very different things. Eventually, you'll hit your head hard enough and it'll stick!

I know a lot of this is easier said than done, so take some time to cool off and unwind. Just make sure you come out of this on top, aight?
*gives you a tight hug* I needed to hear something like that, thank you tyra
 
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