I don't drink coffee or anything related to coffee, so I don't know what I'd be doing in a cafe unless I was desperate to stay awake. And even then, coffee doesn't help me with that, so it would be a waste of money.
If I needed hydration, coffee would be a poor substitute for water.
I'll take some bacon, every kind of sausage, cheddar cheese and Italian salami in a sandwich (white bread, lightly toasted and slathered in butter) with a side order of hashbrowns and baked beans, followed by some more toast to mop up the bean juice. Then ill have tegliatelli with gorgonzola cheese, chives and cream. Followed by a bag a crisps, a large packet of Maltesers and a bed to sleep off that coma.
Large Drip without any extras in it. If you have to put something in your coffee to fix it, that coffee belongs down the drain. Sorry, military mindset. No time to put something in your Joe, so you learn to drink it straight up. After a while unadulterated is the only way it tastes right.
And, pup a plate of scrambled eggs, hash browns, bacon and wheat toast in front of me. That or a few slices of texas french toast.